Thoughts on Life

NFL Championship Weekend

2012-01-22T11:54:00.000-08:00

Straight up 4-4 throughout. I missed on what team would lay an egg (although Baltimore came close anyway).

Important thing to remember here: Destiny doesn't exist. The two matchups that the media is dreaming about (Super Bowl 07 rematch; Harbowl) aren't going to happen. This isn't a sports movie that will line up at the last second.

So, seconds before the first game:

I like New England (but not by 9) and I like San Fran (over three).

NFL Divisional Weekend

2012-01-13T10:21:00.001-08:00

2-2 Last Week. Lions should have no shame in getting blown out by the Saints.

On to this week...

One home team is blowing it. Let's be honest. That's whats happening. The obvious (and therefore not happening) choices are San Fran and Green Bay. I think San Fran may still lose, but the narrative won't be "sluggish and hurt by the bye." The choice for that narrative will be between Baltimore or New England, which both have a recent history of not showing up at times in the postseason. We'll figure it out shortly!

Saints at 49ers (NO by 4): Overhype alert: New Orleans. No respect for a team that won the bye. I'll take the 49ers. I think if you can rattle Drew Brees in the first half and play good defense in the second half (the Lions were halfway there), you have a good shot. San Fran will slow down the game, and that will frustrate Brees. I like San Fran to win here.

Broncos at Patriots (NE by 14): New England does have our potential blown potential narrative, and when we combine that with possibility of the "miraculous Tim Tebow comeback that in retrospect shouldn't be credited to Tim Tebow but rather to some dumb luck and mistakes by the other team" narrative, we could have a compelling story. However, I just don't see that. It's too obvious. Whenever something is obvious, swing the other way. I like the Patriots here by a mile.

Texans at Ravens (Bal by 9): Here it is. Our sleepy bye team, combined with the team that no one is really giving a shot to win. If you look at all the games, the Texans are probably the eight most popular pick. People are making legitimate cases on both sides of the San Fran/New Orleans and Green Bay / New York games. New England is favored, and Tim Tebow has Tebow magic, so they're probably closer to fifty fifty picks. But really noone is picking the Texans. And so I will. Second games between teams are generally closer, so that's my justification if I need one.

Finally, New York at Green Bay (GB by 9). It's a little too obvious for New York to pull an upset here, and so I will swing for Green Bay to win handily.

A Weird Note I Just Noticed: 5/8 of the teams have two word place names (Green Bay, New York, etc). That's 62.5%. Only 10 of the 32 teams have two word place names (31.2%). I don't know what that means, but it's interesting. Or perhaps just dumb. The only game that pits the two against each other is New England/Denver.

NFL: Wildcard Weekend

2012-01-05T14:19:00.000-08:00

I rested my starters the last two weeks. Sorry. That's life.

Anyway, let's look at the playoff matchups.

My playoff picking rules:

1. Momentum Matters.
2. One team is overhyped, one team is underhyped.
3. When in doubt, take the home team. But pick at least one road team.
~~4. Destiny Exists.~~
5. One team is kryptonite.

These have served me well the last two years, as I have gone 0-8 in the wildcard round. I'm feeling it this year though, so let's get to the picks.

The Coin Flip Games:

Cincinnati Bengals at Houston Texans (Hou by 3)
Atlanta Falcons at New York Giants (NYG by 3)

A 50/50 bet either way. I wouldn't put money on these games. None of the teams qualify for overhype/underhype; the two teams with positive momentum are playing each other; the two teams with negative momentum are playing each other; and it's too early to identify a kryptonite.

I listened to Aaron Schatz the other day and he said that Atlanta is the most consistent team in the league - you know what you're getting. But New York must be the most inconsistent team (well, maybe the most inconsistent team not named Baltimore). So either good New York (smoked Dallas last week) or bad New York (lost to Washington the week before) shows up. I don't think Atlanta hangs, and I think we see good New York here. I like the Giants +3.

As far as Cincy/Houston, it's a game of two rookie quarterbacks. Anything could happen. And so we refer to rule 3 - when in doubt, take the home team. Houston +3.

The Predicted Blowouts

Detroit Lions at New Orleans Saints (NO by 11)

I'm jumping all over this one and taking Detroit to cover the spread and win the game outright. Fanboy, who cares. Here are the relevant facts:

Detroit outgained New Orleans four weeks ago, not accounting for penalty yards.

Detroit was missing three or four key defensive players four weeks ago, and still held New Orleans to it's lowest home point total.

Matt Stafford was at the very end of his funk four weeks ago, and is now playing out of his mind.

New Orleans is definitely the most overhyped team coming into round 1. Remember when they blew that stinker to St Louis? This is not the second coming of Touchdown Jesus.

I'm taking Detroit. I'm so confident that I emailed Bill Simmons and told him he was messing with a "Nobody believes in us" team because he was podcasting about whether the weather in San Francisco would mess with New Orleans.

And yes, I may have just doomed my team.

Steelers at Broncos (PIT by 9)

I'm flip flopping on this game. I already have one road team winning, so I don't need to take Pittsburgh. Ultimately, I'm going to take Pittsburgh, unfortunately, and here's why - I can't possibly go 0-4 3 years in a row. But now, if I do, I will have missed on two coin flip games (shrug), on my home team winning, and on Tebow. That' seems defensible for next year.

Go Lions!

NFL Week 15

2011-12-13T11:20:00.000-08:00

With the latest Tebow heroics, the Lions have a shot at a playoff game. They have no shot once they're in the playoffs though... Here are the teams that Detroit could potentially face:

Green Bay (Stompgate, part 3)
New Orleans (Who embarassed us on National TV)
San Fran (Handshake Gate redux)
Dallas (remember, the team we pissed off by coming back from 17 points down, or something)
Atlanta (the team that accused us of making fun of their wussy quarterback)

Each one of those teams will relish knocking us out of the playoffs in their stadium.

On to the picks.

week 14 correct picks: Houston, Minnesota, New Orleans, Philadelphia, Atlanta, Jacksonville, Indianapolis, San Diego,
week 14 incorrect picks: Pittsburgh, Jets, New England, Denver, San Fran, Green Bay, Dallas, Seattle
week 14: 8-8

overall: 101-96-10

week 15 picks:
Jacksonville vs Atlanta (ATL by 12): Jacksonville gets no respect! 41 points last week, a sneaky good defense, and a suddenly beastly MJD? And ATL doesn't really blow out teams, and they play down to their opponent, and I'll take the Jags here.
Cowboys vs Bucs (Dal by 7): Yikes. This will be a goodbye game for Raheem Morris once Dallas takes out their Sunday Night frustration and beats em by 20.
Dolphins vs Bills (Mia by 2): I'm going to take Buffalo here. Home dog playing a team that just fired their head coach.
Seahawks vs Bears (Chi by 4): I will take back every mean thing I said about you Pete Carroll if you can beat the Bears this week. I'll take Seattle and maybe actually watch this game.
Titans vs Colts (Ten by 7): Can't pick the Colts.
Packers at Chiefs (GB by 14): Green Bay dismantles inferior teams. I turned off the Oakland game last week because it was boring. This will be the same.
Bengals at Rams (Cin by 7): I hadn't even seen the line before I was typing "take Cincy."
Saints vs Vikings (NO by 7): I think New Orleans is going to win. I think we're on the road to a rematch of the first game of the season - New Orleans and Green Bay. Won't get any better than that.
Redskins vs Giants (NYG by 7): My secret hope? That Dallas and New York lose out, and Philadelphia somehow gets the NFC East title. I don't think it happens, but it would be fun. New York should win this game.
Panthers vs Texans (Hou by 7): The king of the back door cover may rear his head this week. I'll take Carolina.
Lions vs Raiders (Det by 2): Is McFadden still out? Probably not, since he's already cost me two fantasy leagues. I was going to hedge here, but Carson Palmer is TERRIBLE. The Lions should win. They better win.
Patriots vs Broncos (NE by 7): Here's the thing: Tebow can score a few. He put up 35 on Minnesota, right? And NE has a pretty bad secondary, right? And ultimately, if the game is within 7 at the end, Tebow is going to win, right? I'm gonna take Tebow as my upset.
Jets vs Eagles (Phi by 3): Jets are in their infuriating end of the season run, and Philadelphia just won a game they weren't supposed to. I'll take the Jets here.
Browns vs Cardinals (Ari by 7): Thats a high line for a team that won it's last two by an average of 1.5. I'll take Cleveland to keep it close.
Ravens at Chargers (Bal by 1): A curiously low line. I think Baltimore wants to win and stay in the drivers seat for their division, and I'm also thinking we're one monster loss away from the end of the Norv Turner Era. I'll take Baltimore.
Steelers at 49ers (SF by 3): Oh god. Pittsburgh wins this game and suddenly San Fran will be the 3 seed... Playing the 6 seed in round one... Are you ready to see the handshake 4000 times?

Fantasy:
I just missed the playoffs in both Go Lions and CRISTAball. Ultimately, McFadden being out and not having a solid QB cost me CRISTAball, and Go Lions was lost because Dave couldn't beat Crazy Keith in the last week. That hurts, Dave.

I'm in the playoffs in the Emerald City Eight, and have a couple of dilemmas. Here are my four running backs:

Rashard Mendenhall (playing San Fran, 1st against run)
Chris Johnson (Playing Indy, 30th against run)
MJD (playing Atl, 6th against run)
AP (playing NO, 20th against run, and coming back from injury).

My three receivers:
Vincent Jackson
Marques Colston
Julio Jones

Pick 3 from the first and 2 from the second...

(oh, and I'm playing Gonzalez over Gates this week).

NFL Quick Picks

2011-12-11T08:44:00.000-08:00

quickly now:

week 13 correct: Seattle, Titans, Chiefs (Upset), Miami, Denver, Pittsburgh, Jets (lock), Texans, Baltimore, San Fran, New Orleans, San Diego

Week 13 incorrect: New England, Tampa, Green Bay, Dallas,

Week 13: 12-4

overall: 93-88-10

I'll take a hit for the Pittsburgh game; I don't know what I would have taken so it's a loss.

I like:

Texans - 3: TJ Yates... not bad!

Detroit -10: Don't think Detroit blows em out, but still get the win.

Saints +4: Not buying Ten anymore.

Eagles -3: I'm selling Miami, as they are going really high right now.

Jets -11: Don't think Sanchez has it in him to blow them out.

Patriots +9: I'll lock this guy down!

Falcons +3: As many touchdowns as will be in this game, it won't come down to three points, and I think that favors Atl.

Jacksonville -3: Dumb game, dumb teams. Take the Jags as an upset.

Ravens -17: Uh, why would I pick the team that has a history of playing down to their opponents to win by 17?

Denver +4: Tebow!

SF +5: That's basically free money, right? (I'm not taking a page out of Bill Simmons book and trying to curse San Fran, trust me I'm not!).

GB -13: I think they win here, but it's not going to be a blowout. This is probably the trickiest game for GB - two weeks in a row of games they could have lost, followed by a game they should win... Something smells funny.

SD +7: I think Buffalo might be done. And San Diego is trying for that patented "just when you thought we were out, Oakland and Denver lose this weekend and we are suddenly only one game back..."

Dal +3: No idea why. Home team I guess.

Seahawks -10: Don't think Seattle has a blowout in them.

Week 13 Picks

2011-12-01T11:55:00.000-08:00

Week 11 Record: 5-9

Week 12 Record: 7-3-5 (I meant to take New Orleans).

Overall Record: 81-84-10

Week 13 Picks:
Eagles at Seahawks (Phi by 3): Qwest over Young. (That means I pick Seattle).
Titans at Bills (Buf by 3): I'm taking Ten here, because they have something to play for.
Chiefs at Bears (Chi by 7): I can't pick Hanie to win by 7! I'll take the Chiefs as an upset.
Raiders at Dolphins (Mia by 3): Miami is frisky, and I'll take them here. Oakland is about due for a loss.
Broncos at Vikings (Min by 1): How can you pick against Tebow right now? Especially without AP?
Colts at Patriots (NE by 21): When does Brady get pulled? Second quarter, right? That should be enough to get 24 points, which should cover the line.
Bengals at Steelers (Pit by 7)
Panthers at Buccaneers (TB by 3): Tampa, I would hope. I think. I dont know.
Jets at Redskins (NYJ by 3): I will take the Jets as a lock. Don't look now, but we're headed for another 6th seed for the Jets, who will then win two games and get blown out in an AFC championship.
Falcons at Texans (ATL by 3): Go TJ Yates! I'll pick Houston - the home dog.
Ravens at Browns (Bal by 7): Someone said this on a podcast the other day: it's not a trap game when it's every other game. I'll take Baltimore.
Packers at Giants (GB by 7): Intrigueing to look at the Giants. But I hear they have some injuries, so I'll take the Packers. But the Giants have a tendency to win games you don't expect.
Cowboys at Cardinals (Dal by 5): Dallas? I guess?
Rams at 49ers (SF by 14): I'm never picking the Rams again.
Lions at Saints (NO by 9): Big game for the Lions. They need to go 3-2 to make the playoffs. Minnesota is probably a win, SD certainly looks doable. So we need to either pick up a game here, at Oakland, or at Green Bay (week 17). If New York could pull off an upset this week, then Detroit probably takes week 17. I dont think Detroit wins this week, but I think we might still limp into the playoffs.
Chargers at Jaguars (SD by 3): Wow, SD has quit, hasn't they? But Del Rio got fired, so SD will win this one.

Fantasy Records:
Emerald City Eight: 7-5 for 3rd place. Should make the playoffs (Which I guess are in week 15 in this league?

Cristaball: 6-4 for 4th place in my division, currently. I need a win and two people to lose, and I might still not make it based on the tiebreakers. I think the playoffs start week 14 and are two weeks a round? What a weird league.

Go Lions: 7-5 for third place. I have a rough game this week, but I'm also hopeful 4th place will lose to Dave. I seem to be in good position for the playoffs, which are week 15.

Week 12 quick picks

2011-11-27T09:24:00.001-08:00

Thanksgiving blah busy blah here are the picks blah blah oh god the quick picks:

I took Detroit, Dallas, Baltimore. 1-2 so far.

Falcons +10

Bengals +7

Ten +3

Indy -4

Rams +3

Bills -10 (upset)

Texans +7 (lock)

Raiders +3

Seahawks +3

Eagles -4

Broncos -6

Chiefs -11

Week 11: Congratulations

2011-11-17T10:13:00.000-08:00

Major congratulations to my good friend Dave, with the birth of his daughter Emaline this last week. Not that Dave birthed Emaline (as far as I know, that was Allison). Readers may know that I recently beat Dave soundly in fantasy football (121.12-121.06), so I'm glad he's able to have some sun in his life.

Week 10 Correct Picks: New Orleans, Pittsburgh, Dallas, Tennessee, Seattle, Chicago (I intended to pick them but did not write it, and I'm taking the credit), Patriots,
Week 10 Incorrect Picks: San Diego, Cleveland, Indianapolis, Kansas City, Washington, New York Giants (Lock 4-5-1), Philadephia, Buccaneers (Upset 5-5), Vikings

Week 10 Record: 7-9
Record Thus Far: 69-70-7 (Ah, below .500!)

Week 11 Picks
Jets at Broncos (NYJ by 7): It's either NY by 30, or Denver by 1. So I'm unsure. I had to pick up Sanchez and Burress in one league, so I'm gonna imagine it's NYJ by 30.
Jaguars at Browns (Jac by 1): Can Cleveland score touchdowns? I'm not sure. I like Jacksonville here, as I don't think Cleveland will get over 6 points.
Panthers at Lions (Det by 7): I'm pretty sure that Detroit will blow out the Panthers this week to set up the game against Green Bay on Thanksgiving. And I'm pretty sure the league will make sure that the narrative for Thanksgiving is the 7-3 Lions versus the 10-0 Packers rather than the Packers Versus the Lions-who-have-lost-4-of-their-last-5.
Buccanneers at Packers (GB by 14): Jeez, is GB gonna get double digit points every week? I have to take them here too.
Bills at Dolphins (Mia by 1): I like Buffalo. Everyones a little too quick on the Miami bandwagon.
Raiders at Vikings (Oak by 1): I have no idea. I guess I'll pick Oakland.
Cowboys at Redskins (Dal by 8): I tried to talk myself into Washington here, but I'm gonna pick Dallas. There's a more sane upset pick later in the round.
Bengals at Ravens (Bal by 8): Ravens. They play good against good teams.
Seahawks at Rams (STL by 2): Don't pick NFC West teams on the road! St Louis. Lock!
Cardinals at 49ers (SF by 10): I don't like SF by 10 over anyone - they just don't blow teams out. I'll take Arizona as an upset - only because I think the final game will be deceptively close.
Titans at Falcons (Atl by 7): Titans could sneak back into the AFC South if Leinart blows up Houston. I think I'll take Ten here, at least to keep it close.
Chargers at Bears (Chi by 4): If I rewrote my bias rankings, I would absolutely rank Chicago 32. (Edit: I did already). I hate them. And to see everyone jump on their bandwagon as the third best team in the NFC - it's ridiculous. Let's compare the wins/losses for Detroit/Chicago. They split their series, so Chicago has losses to New Orleans and Green Bay. Detroit has losses to San Francisco and Atlanta. These teams are even - even down to the brittle quarterback under a lost of criticism. Chicago runs, Detroit throws. The bottom line? Screw Chicago. I'll take San Diego.
Eagles at Giants (NYG by 4): I can't really pick against New York, and I can't pick Philadelphia anymore.
Chiefs at Patriots (NE by 15): New England. Don't be silly.

Week 10: The Carnage of the Quick Picks

2011-11-10T10:50:00.000-08:00

Note to self: never make quick picks again. I went a stunning 3-11 this week, the highlight of which was missing on each and every early game. Clearly I need to actually put thought into the picks.

Week 9 Correct Picks: Denver, Giants, Baltimore,
Week 9 Incorrect Picks: Bills, Cowboys, Colts (Upset 5-4), Chiefs, Bucs, Redskins, Cleveland, Titans, Rams, Chargers, Eagles

Week 9 Record: 3-11
Overall: 62-61-7

Week 10 Picks
Raiders at Chargers (SD by 7): No McFadden, and the Chargers finally started to look like a good team last week. It was like they clicked into gear or something. I'll take San Diego here.
Saints at Falcons (NO by 1): I wrote off Atlanta earlier this year, and I'm not quite ready to pencil them back into being real yet. So I'll take NO.
Steelers at Bengals (Pit by 3): Hard to know what to make of the Bengals. Ultimately, I think they are a schedule fraud, and I'll take Pittsburgh.
Rams at Browns (Cle by 3): I desperately want to pick against Cleveland, but the safe money is to not bet on NFC west teams that don't rhyme with "Fan Trancisco." So I'll pick Cleveland...
Bills at Cowboys (Dal by 6): I like Dallas to bounce back here and shut down Fred Jackson, so I'll take Dallas.
Jaguars at Colts (Jac by 3): Indy has some breathing room in the Luck sweepstakes now; so all they have to do is not screw up and win here. I do predict a close game though, so I'll pick Indy.
Broncos at Chiefs (KC by 4): Weird game. Not sure what to think. Will take KC; Arrowhead should rattle Tebow much like Ford Field did.
Redskins at Dolphins (Mia by 4): Unsure of either of these teams. So in that case, I'll guess Washington keeps it close?
Cardinals at Eagles (No line): No line (Kolb?), but I'll take Philly.
Texans at Bucs (Hou by 4): I'm so uneasy about supporting Houston. They're a good team with deep flaws that will crumble when they meet any of the AFC powerhouses in the playoffs. I'm gonna take the Bucs as my Upset.
Titans at Panthers (Car by 4): I like CJ to finally get out of his funk here, and for Ten to win.
Ravens at Seahawks (Bal by 7): Quest stadium trap game. I'll take the Seahawks.
Lions at Bears (Chi by 3):
Giants at 49ers (SF by 3): If the NYG win this game, they get to be Number 2 in everyone's power rankings, right? I think the Giants will finally unnerve Alex Smith, and I'll Lock it in.
Patriots at Jets (NYJ by 1): Great game, great rivalry. Strangely, Rex Ryan has been silent(!) this week. I'll be taking the Patriots, as I'm not ready to believe Belichick and Brady will lose 3 straight grudge matches.
Vikings at Packers (GB by 14): Can't pick against GB, but 14 points is awfully high... And haven't the Vikes been playing well? Aw, I'll take the Vikes.

Fantasy Review
I can retire happy in Fantasy Football now. No, I haven't won a league yet. But I did beat my good friend who knows way more about football than me... Dave Morgan. Final Score? 121.12 to 121.06. I beat Dave by 6/10ths of a yard. Stunning.

Week 9: Quick Picks

2011-11-04T07:54:00.001-07:00

Week 8 Correct Picks: Titans, Miami (Upset 5-3), Buffalo, Detroit, Pittsburgh, Philly,
Week 8 Correct Picks: New Orleans, Minnesota, Ravens (Lock 4-4-1), San Francisco, Cincinnati, Chiefs
Week 8 Push: Houston

Week 8 Review: 6-6-1
Year Thus Far: 59-50-7

Week 9 Picks:
Bills +2
Dallas +12
Colts -8 (Upset)
Chiefs +5
Bucs -9
Washington -4
Cleveland -11
Titans +3
Denver -9
Giants -9
Rams -2
Chargers -6
Bal -4
Eagles +8

I may have my plusses and minuses mixed up, but those are my picks.

Fantasy:
Still doing well, but I have another big divisional game against Dave this week, and I just traded my mvp - McFadden. Picked up Mendenhall and a good backup QB in Matt Schaub.

Week 8: SeeSawing through the picks

2011-10-24T11:01:00.001-07:00

Prepare for a week of seesaw games. Good teams lost bad, and bad teams lost bad, and thus some of these lines may be jacked.

Week 7 Correct Picks: Atlanta, Denver, Carolina, Pittsburgh (Lock 4-2-1), Minnesota, New Orleans,
Week 7 Incorrect Picks: Tennesee, San Diego, Tampa Bay, Oakland, St Louis (Upset 4-3), Baltimore
Week 7 Push: Cleveland

Week 7 Record: 6-6-1
Record Thus Far: 53-44-6

Week 8 Picks
Colts at Titans (Ten by 9): Two teams that were embarassed last week, but only one that can do something about it. I'll take Tennessee.
Saints at Rams (NO by 14): Sean Payton is a classy guy. After going ahead by 40 points, the Saints just ran, no passes. They weren't trying to run up the score. But, I'll stick with New Orleans again.
Dolphins at Giants (NYG by 10): This is a classic "did we learn anything" game. The Giants are favored at home by 10 to a crappy team. Just like Seattle two weeks ago. And I'm no sucker, so I'll take Miami as my upset. Geez...
Vikings at Panthers (Car by 4): I liked Ponder last week, but I think he'll regress a little here and Carolina will win.
Cardinals at Ravens (Bal by 13): Angry hornets. Thats what I imagine the defense of Baltimore will be like this week. I don't imagine that Cardinals will get points, so I will take Baltimore as the lock. As a side note, here's what I wrote about Bal/Jac:
"This feels like a classic Flacco crap game, doesn't it? Don't they always have one or two losses that leave everyone scratching their head and wondering what the heck happened? But even then... I'm not brave enough to pick it, so I'll take Baltimore."
Jaguars at Texans (Hou by 10): Chicken and the egg: was Jacksonville's defense that good, or was Baltimore's offense that bad? I think it was mostly Baltimores offense, and I think Houston will win here, and by 10.
Redskins at Bills (Buf by 6): I'm off the Washington train. Bills!
Lions at Broncos (Lions by 3): For the first time here, I will pick the Lions. I don't think Tebow will do well against the Lions defense.
Patriots at Steelers (Pats by 3): The Patriots always win against the Steelers, but I don't like them here. I think if they win it will be by a little, so I'll take Pittsburgh.
Browns at 49ers (SF by 9): I watched a ton of that Cleveland/Seattle game because I'm a sadist. I think SF wins here, but I'm concerned that this will be a crappy Alex Smith game, so I'm not giving them 9 points.
Bengals at Seahawks (Cin by 3): I'll pick Seattle (shudder). It's a home game, and that's a 5 point swing in favor of Seattle.
Cowboys at Eagles (Phi by 4): Tough game to pick. I think I'll take Philadelphia (home team).
Chargers at Chiefs (SD by 4): There's still a lot of talk about Kansas City winning this game outright and taking a share of the division lead. I don't think so. San Diego is better than they've been trending, and Kansas City isn't as good as they've been trending. I'll take SD.

Fantasy Review
Go Lions: I scored 64 points last week... and won. Going into Monday Night, I was ahead by 6 points with no players left, and my opponent had Ray Rice left. I was ecstatic about the Baltimore loss. Currently, my record is 5-2 which is second in the Barry Sanders division.
Emerald City Eight: Won my last game, for a record of 4-3. I'm in fourth place.
CRISTABall: Lost badly, for a record of 4-2. I'm third in my division, but both people ahead of me have played one more divisional games.

Week 7: The Curse of Bobby Layne gives way to the Curse of....

2011-10-19T09:13:00.001-07:00

Bobby Layne once famously cursed Detroit to fifty years without winning a Superbowl. That curse culminated in the 0-16 season exactly 50 years later (and no Superbowls). The Lions are now (theoretically) free of that curse... But I wonder if we aren't suffering from another, unknown curse. The Curse of... Barry Sanders.

What? The Detroit hero? The most famous Lion of all time? One of top three running backs of all time?

Yeah. Him. Since Barry unceremoniously retired after the 98 season, the Lions have had the worst run imaginable of runningbacks. I did a little statistical research (crazy, I know). Here's the summary:

Since 98 (where Barry finished 4th), the highest a Detroit running back has finished in yards gained is 14th, by James Stewart in 2000.

Since 98, our leading rusher has been on average the 27th best rusher (26.5 to be exact).

I don't think the blame can be entirely on the offensive line, either. We've had some success in passing - Jon Kitna, for crying out loud - but never anything in the running game. Additionally, we have been drafting so high for a few years that I'm willing to bet that any of the top 10 runningbacks this year went behind our other draft picks. Detroit just doesn't do well with runningbacks any more.

And now we find out that Jahvid Best may be done for the year and we have traded for... Ronnie Brown. He of the goal line fumble a few weeks ago against San Fran.

Somehow I don't expect the curse to break anytime soon. Are we to expect 50 years of futility on the ground?

Week 6 Correct Picks: Bengals, 49ers, Packers, Eagles, Bucs (Upset: 4-2), Jets

Week 6 Incorrect Picks: Panthers, Steelers, Ravens, Patriots, Minnesota

Week 6 Push: Giants, Raiders (Lock: 3-2-1). I count the NYG pick as a moral victory.
Week 6 Record: 6-5-2
Record Thus Far: 47-38-5

Week 7 Picks
Seahawks at Browns (Cle by 3): Never pick the seahawks on the road.
Falcons at Lions (Det by 4): My streak was broken (It's my fault; I forgot to wear my lucky red wings hat), so I'm no longer constrained to picking against Detroit. However, I still have a bad feeling about this matchup and will take Atl.
Texans at Titans (Ten by 3): I believe in Matt Hasselbeck... Uh, what? Eh, he's my quarterback this week in one league (wait til you hear who my other quarterback is!). I think Tennessee handles this and vaults into the front running for the AFC South.
Broncos at Dolphins (Mia by 2): The first Suck-for-Luck game. Tebow isn't going to give up, but Miami is actively going to. I'll take Denver.
Chargers at Jets (SD by 2): At New York, huh. I don't know what to make of these two teams. New York (and Sanchez) have looked horrible. But San Diego and Philips have not been outstanding. I guess I'll take San Diego here.
Bears at Buccaneers (Chi by 1): Um, totally ridiculous line. I like Tampa Here.
Redskins at Panthers (Car by 3): John Beck alert! Time to bench your Santana Moss's (why were you playing him anyway?) and start anyone else. I'll take Carolina even if Cam let me down last week.
Chiefs at Raiders (Oak by 4): I like the Raiders this year. I don't have any idea what Palmer will do for them; but I do know that he's going to give it to McFadden 40 times this game, and that should be good enough to beat the Chiefs by a lot. I would lock this game, but I did that with Oakland last week, so I'll pick a different team.
Steelers at Cardinals (Pit by 4): Ooh, here's a good Lock. Pittsburgh, and do we see a Kevin Kolb benching? I think maybe we do!
Rams at Cowboys (Dal by 13): I don't like Dallas to beat anyone by 13, so I guess St Louis is my Upset. Wait, what? They're an NFC west team... But I'm going to stick with it.
Packers at Vikings (GB by 9): It's at Minnesota and I think it will be close. I'll take Minnesota.
Colts at Saints (NO by 14): The other Suck-For-Luck team is Indy. I think Indy will be better at hiding it than Miami (to avoid the inevitable crapstorm that will brew), but I still think they get blown out here by an angry New Orleans team.
Ravens at Jaguars (Bal by 8): This feels like a classic Flacco crap game, doesn't it? Don't they always have one or two losses that leave everyone scratching their head and wondering what the heck happened? But even then... I'm not brave enough to pick it, so I'll take Baltimore.

Fantasy Review
Went 2-0 this past weekend. The big news of the week? Eli Manning is on a bye for my CRISTABall league, so I went to the waiver wire.

And yes. I picked him up.

Go Tim Tebow.

Week 6: Some Rules Emerge

2011-10-10T10:41:00.000-07:00

I've discovered a few things this year, and have developed a new rule system for how to pick games against the spread. Here's the new set of rules (listed in descending order of importance (so the last rule trumps rules before it)).

4. Cam Newton covers spreads.

3. Don't back the NFC West on the road.

2. If you think the Giants should do well, pick the other team. If they should do poorly, pick the Giants.

1. Continue to pick against the Lions until they lose (don't break the streak).

Week 5 Correct Picks: Kansas City (Upset 3-2), Minnesota (Lock 3-2), Carolina, Oakland, San Francisco, San Diego, Green Bay
Week 5 Incorrect Picks: Philadelphia, Seattle, Tennessee, Jacksonville, Chicago
Week 5 Push: New England
Week 5 Record: 7-5-1
Year Thus Far: 41-33-3

Week 6 Picks:
Panthers at Falcons (ATL by 4): See above and take Carolina.
Colts at Bengals (CIN by 7): Cincinnati has a really good defense, who should cover this spread themselves.
49ers at Lions (Det by 5): See Rule 1 above. I pick San Fran.
St Louis at Green Bay (GB by 16): A few things warring in me here: don't back crappy nfc west teams on the road... but sixteen points is a lot. Green Bay only blew out one team this year, Denver. Is St Louis worse than Denver...? Yes. Green Bay then.
Bills at Giants (NYG by 3): It seems like the Bills are the better team, so I'll take New York.
Jaguars at Steelers (PIT by 13): A really good defense will always super trump an inept offense. Pittsburgh.
Eagles at Redskins (PHI by 2): You know once I stop picking the Eagles or when I sit Vick in fantasy they'll explode for a game they're due for. The Eagles are definitely last years Cowboys; I don't think they have any respect for Reid left. But I'll give them one more try, and take them here. If they don't pull it off here, I'm off the Eagles Train completely.
Browns at Raiders (OAK by 7): Oakland would be the ultimate flip-flop team if not for NYG. But I rather like this matchup, and McFadden should be due for another monster. I'll take the Raiders as my Lock.
Texans at Ravens (BAL by 8): Injuries mounting for the Texans. Sidenote: only in sports can you use the phrase "mounting" and it's not inappropriate. Unless we are talking about Roethlisberger. I like Baltimore in this game, but I don't like them by 8 points.
Cowboys at Patriots (NE by 7): I love it when the Ryan brothers open their mouth and get proved wrong like the idiots they are. Latest example is that the Dallas defense will be bringing the "kitchen sink" to stop Brady. Uh, no. I'll bet that doesn't work and Dallas gets blown out.
Saints at Bucs (NO by 4): Since I like the Bucs to rebound and keep this one close, they are my Upset.
Vikings at Bears (CHI by 3): Intrigueing battle of has-beens in the NFC North. McNabb versus Cutler... It's Sunday Night Football on NBC! I'll take Minnesota.
Dolphins at Jets (NYJ by 7): This is an interesting upset pick. But how far can you ride the Jets downfall? They should win here by a lot, but Miami does weird things in games sometimes.

Fantasy Review:
CRISTABall - I am a wrecking ball in this league, and now I get Aaron Hernandez back! (Bye Tony Scheffler). I won 140-30 this week, and am on a bye this week. This has to be the weirdest scoring fantasy league I've ever been in; Eli Manning had 52 points this week. Also, byes in fantasy? Weird.
Go Lions - Hope is fading quickly. Too many disappointments (Vick, Jackson) to outweigh the brightspots (McFadden, Gonzalez). I lost pretty badly to Dave last week, and half of my team is apparently on a bye this week. We'll see if I can waiver up some replacements.
Emerald City Eight - What an exhilariting ride this league has been... But I'm probably done for here. I lost this week, in the most maddening way... I had two remaining players (Stafford and the Lions D/ST). Stafford gets me just enough points to be two points ahead of the team I'm playing (122-120 at this point), and then the Lions stop throwing all together and go to Jahvid Best to grind out the clock. If Stafford gets 10 more yards, I get a point and probably win. Instead... they punt, and Chicago racks up 90 garbage yards (or however long that last drive was) and I lost 119-120. Unbelievable.

But hey, the Lions still win, so there!

Week 5: The NFL punishes fans because?

2011-10-04T15:33:00.000-07:00

Last week, I got super excited. As I was watching the Seattle game, they advertised that Detroit-Dallas was the game of the week in the early slot on Fox. Seattle was playing in the late slot. I assumed this meant that I would finally get to see the Lions! I caught 45 seconds of the end of the Minnesota game (3 downs: false start by Backus, false start by Backus, sack allowed by Backus), but other than that I've been living on highlights.

Imagine my confusion then when Fox turns off football and goes to infomercials. That's right. Instead of the game of the week, I would have to watch infomercials.

There are some seriously archaic rules when it comes to broadcasting NFL games - for example, when the Seahawks are playing at home, other channels can't play other games during the same time frame! Apparently you are only allowed to support the home team.

Does the NFL realize that all this does is drive people to watch illegally? I found a live stream of the Lions game and watched that, crappy stream and all. If Roger Goodell can explain this in a way that tells me why it's important to the game that I can't watch Detroit, please do so.

Week 4 Correct Picks: Carolina, Tennessee (Upset 2-2), New Orleans, New York Giants, New England (Lock 2-2), San Diego, Tampa Bay
Week 4 Incorrect Picks: Buffalo, Dallas, Minnesota, St Louis, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, Atlanta, Denver, New York Jets,
Week 4: 7-9
Year thus Far: 34-28-2

Week 5 Games:
Eagles at Bills (Phi by 3): Weird line, based on the records. Vegas is still just a little too in love with Philly. Still... I like Philly to turn things around a bit here and steal this one in Buffalo.
Chiefs at Colts (Ind by 3): Another strange line. We're saying these two teams are basically even, huh? I don't know. I like the Chiefs as my upset.
Cardinals at Vikings (Min by 3): If Min is going to win one, has to be here, right? Plus, don't take NFC west teams on the road. I'll even dare destiny and take an 0-4 team as my lock.
Seahawks at Giants (NYG by 10): Don't take NFC west teams on the road. Just don't.
Titans at Steelers (Pit by 4): Thursday Update: Forgot to write anything about this game. Maybe because I don't like the idea of picking either team. Anyway, I like Tennesee.
Saints at Panthers (NO by 7): You can throw on New Orleans, and Cam Newton can cover a spread. I'll take Carolina.
Bengals at Jaguars (Jac by 2): Gross game. I'll take the home team, but I don't feel good about it.
Oakland at Houston (Hou by 6): I don't know that Houston will have as much success running on Oakland as they did Pittsburgh. But I think McFadden will have some decent success. So I like Oakland.
Buccanneers at 49ers (SF by 2): I want to talk myself into not liking San Francisco... But I think the smart money here is on SF. Tampa Bay coming across the country on a short week spells trouble.
Chargers at Broncos (SD by 4): It's like Philip Rivers is messing with me. The spread was 9 last week, and they won by 10. Barely. I think we'll finally see a San Diego blowout.
Jets at Patriots (NE by 9): Dear lord, I'm taking the Jets. Gulp. I think they are a little better than they played the last two weeks, and they always play New England hard. I think it will be a close one though.
Packers at Falcons (GB by 6): I can't for the life of me pick a team that should have lost to Seattle. Atlanta made a old-time-lions mistake at the end which would have been the talk of the league had they lost (well, after the Dallas talk anyway). It was a 3rd and medium just after the two minute warning. Seattle had one timeout left and was down by 2. If Atlanta just rushes here, they guarantee that Seattle has to use their timeout - regardless of whether Atlanta gets the first down. Instead, they threw it, incomplete, and Seattle got the ball back with plenty of time and a timeout remaining. If Tarvaris Jackson wasn't so inept, ATL would have lost because of that play. And thus, I pick the Packers.
Bears at Lions (Det by 6): I actually don't think I would pick the Lions this week even if I hadn't sworn to keep picking against them (as a reverse-jinx). I think there will be a lot of pressure for playing on Monday night; and I think it will be close. So I'll take Chicago hear, but only because I think Detroit will only win by 3. 27-24 final score. Oh, and for the love of God, don't kick it to Hester.

Fantasy Review:
Bleh. Went 1-2 this week; Henderson threw goose eggs in two leagues for me - the same two leagues I ended up playing against Forte. I did win in the Go Lions League to stay even with the top of my division. Have a big division showdown against Dave this week.

NFL Update:

2011-10-01T10:21:00.001-07:00

Go to this webpage.

Here are the unanimous picks:

Chicago over Carolina

Philadelphia over San Fran

New Orleans over Jacksonville

Atlanta over Seattle

Green Bay over Denver

San Diego over Miami

Baltimore over New York

Houston over Pittsburgh

Tampa Bay over Indianapolis

Nine games the experts all picked the same. The experts seem to be picking about 2/3rds of games correct, so we can probably imagine 3 of these picks will be wrong. What scares me is I only disagree in one place - Pitt over Houston is my pick. New York over Baltimore is probably the other best bet, but I still like Baltimore. So what other two teams would you pick to be upset?

What?

2011-09-30T09:14:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to say:

Former Mars Hill Pastor teams up with Former Lost Showrunner to create new spiritual tv series.

Week 4: 85 Million Years Ago, Detroit and Buffalo also went 3-0

2011-09-27T10:05:00.000-07:00

I watched Terra Nova last night, and enjoyed it. I'm a sucker for dinosaurs. That being said, there is one gigantic plot hole I noticed. If the time travel portal/fracture thing is a one way trip to a different universe, how did they discover it? It's not like Stephen Lang could send back a notice that "hey, it's okay, just send some dino-repellent," - it's a one way trip!

Are there similar plot holes in the remaining 3-0 teams? Sure.

Green Bay - Green Bay is winning, most assuredly. But they haven't actually put a team away yet. New Orleans had a chance to win; Carolina kept it worringly close; and Chicago would have been threatening if not for a phantom holding call on that amazing punt return play. Once Green Bay has a 14 point lead, they seem to fall asleep. Keep an eye on Kyle Orton keeping the game close this week.

Detroit - Detroit is 3-0 for the first time since 1980. But the opponents they've beaten are 2-7. Let's not jump out of our seats yet. Dallas should post a good challenge - after all, Dallas has as many wins as the total of the Lions opponents through three weeks.

Buffalo - Buffalo biggest problem is their hype. They (by benefit of beating the Patriots) are the most hyped team in the league right now (which leaves Detroit feeling good). Oh, and they haven't played a defense yet.

Let's move on to the Week 3 Review:

Week 3 Correct Picks: Buffalo, San Fran, Miami, Minnesota, Carolina, Oakland, Baltimore, Green Bay, Seattle, Tampa Bay,
Week 3 Incorrect Picks: Tennessee, Houston (Upset 1-2), Philadelphia, San Diego, Pittsburgh (Lock 1-2), Washington
Week 3: 10-6
Season So Far: 27-19-2

Week 4 Games:
Carolina at Chicago (Chi by 7): We'll read all week long about how Chicago will be going to a more rush oriented offense... and then they're going to throw 90% of the time. I like Cam Newton to keep it close.
Buffalo at Cincinnati (Buf by 3): This has the makings of a classic letdown game; but can you imagine Cincy keeping within 3 of Buffalo's offense? I'll take Buffalo here.
Tennessee at Cleveland (Cle by 1): Wow, Cleveland by 1? Interesting line here. I was all prepared to take Tennessee for quite awhile (and even pick up Matt Hasselbeck in at least one league), but the injury to Britt has scared me off for a little bit. Cleveland is at home, but I can't help but think is the game where CJ takes off. I'll pick Ten as my upset.
Detroit at Dallas (Dal by 2): Last week, I vowed to keep picking against Detroit as long as they were winning, because I'm superstitious. Well, because ESPN.com had the line at 4 for Detroit, I actually made my pick last week. However, I have to keep the streak going and pick Dallas here.
Minnesota at Kansas City (Min by 2): Minnesota and Kansas City - the two unluckiest teams of 2011? Minnesota can hang with good teams in the first half; and I don't think KC is up to mounting a comeback. Although how amazing would it be if Minny bungled another double digit lead? I take Min here anyway.
Washington at St Louis (N/A): I can't find the line for this game, or it's a pick em. Can't quite tell. I like St Louis, because they're at home and in desperation mode.
San Francisco at Philadelphia (N/A): No line, obviously. Either way, take Philadelphia. Just imagine poor Alex Smith trying to throw against Samuel, Asomugha, Rodgers-Cromartie. Not a pretty sight.
New Orleans at Jacksonville (NO by 8): Good line. I like New Orleans in this matchup; ten points feels like an easy score to win by. Gabbert may have a surprisingly good day - 240 yards, 2 tds, 2 picks is my guess.
Pittsburgh at Houston (Hou by 4): I'm a subscriber in the "Houston is a tease" philosophy. Once Pitt wins here, the frantic "Could Houston really have suckered us in again?" blogs will appear.
NY Giants at Arizona (NYG by 1): Don't pick NFC west teams. NYG.
Atlanta at Seattle (ATL by 6): Two contrary impulses in me regarding this game: Seattle wins at home by an average of 5-6 points. But last week they won because Arizona missed two field goals. Tarvaris Jackson couldn't do anything against Arizona's pass coverage - which was horrendous! Here's a new rule: don't back NFC West teams unless they're playing another NFC West team. So I'll take Atlanta.
Denver at Green Bay (GB by 13): Green Bay hasn't put anyone away yet. Kyle Orton isn't bad, and the Bronco's should be able to manage a back door cover.
New England at Oakland (NE by 5): Man, Darren McFadden is looking awesome! I have him in two leagues, and he's pretty much winning me games by himself. New England is probably just a bit embarassed right now, and Oakland a little full of themselves, so I'll take New England as my Lock.
Miami at San Diego (SD by 9): When is Philip Rivers going to singlehandedly start his MVP campaign? I tell you what - if he doesn't blow out Miami here, I'm writing off the MVP and also predicting San Diego's under for the rest of the year. One more chance, Rivers. And no, I'm not bitter that I have your receivers on all of my fantasy teams.
NY Jets at Baltimore (Bal by 4): I'm a little too partial to Baltimore and a little too biased against NY. I like Baltimore to win here, but NY to cover.
Indianapolis at Tampa Bay (TB by 10): Tampa isn't the type of team to blow out another team. So I'm taking the under; ten points is about 4 points too high for me.

Fantasy Review:
CRISTAball: 103-59 victory. In such a thin league, one superstar like Darren McFadden makes quite a difference.
Emerald City Eight: I guessed right that Gates wasn't playing and signed Fred Davis. Didn't end up needing him; as I won by 20 points anyway. I'm not proud, as my opponents highest two scorers were his kicker and his defense. Should I start Fred Jackson over MJD for week 4?
Go Lions: Solid 30 point win here, despite Vick. I have my toughest matchup so far, against 3-0 Iron City. I have some gaping holes in my lineup - I only have 3 starting running backs, and one of them is Joseph Addai. Also, my QB's are Vick and Bradford, so thing's don't look great there. I'm hoping to snooker a sucker into a trade. I don't know what those words mean.

Week 3: What do we know so far? (Hint: Nothing)

2011-09-20T13:01:00.000-07:00

Buffalo and Detroit are both 2-0. Indy and KC are 0-2. Cam Newton has 2000 yards already, and Brady is on pace for 7500 yards.

Wait, what?

Yeah. It's that sort of season. But lest you forget... We know nothing after two weeks. We'll see what we find out this week, as there are some good barometer games.

Week 2 Correct Picks: Tennessee, New Orleans, Pittsburgh, Arizona, Cincinnatti, Houston, Atlanta (upset 1-1), New York Giants
Week 2 Incorrect Picks: Oakland, Kansas City, Cleveland, Tampa Bay, Jacksonville (Lock 1-1), Green Bay, San Diego,
Week 2 Push: Dallas

Week 2: 8-7-1
Total: 17-13-2

Week 3 Games:
New England at Buffalo (NE by 9): I still don't know if I believe in Buffalo, but I'm picking up Fitzpatrick and playing him this week in place of Vick. And because Buffalo can score, I'm thinking New England can't quite cover this week.
San Francisco at Cincinnati (Cin by 3): Knowing my luck, this will be the game on TV, and I'll have to shoot myself. I'll take San Fran I guess.
Miami at Cleveland (Cle by 3): And if SF/Cin isn't on TV, it's a lock that this game will be. Ugh. I'll take Miami, as they are a decent road team.
Denver at Tennessee (Ten by 7): Every year there's one conference that's just weird - A beats B, who beats C, who beats A. Pretty sure it's the AFC South this year. We'll know for sure once Houston has to play Ten or Jax. For now, I'm going to pick Tennessee in this game because Denver sucks.
Detroit at Minnesota (Det by 4): Here's what I'm stuck with: I'm picking against Detroit every week from here on out. Right now they're on a streak and I won't be the one who ruins that. So I take Minnesota here.
Houston at New Orleans (NO by 4): Actually, the Houston bandwagon is pretty quiet this year. Everyone's waiting for the bottom to fall out. And sure, why not this game, right? Except that New Orleans is pretty porous when it comes to defense. So I'm thinking Houston is my Upset of the Week (and then falls apart next week).
New York Giants at Philadelphia (N/A): No line because Vick is probably out. I would imagine the line being PHI by 3 with no Vick, and by 5 or 6 with Vick. I'm taking Philly here.
Jacksonville at Carolina (Car by 4): Sure why, not. Cam Newton over Luke McCown.
New York Jets at Oakland (NY by 4): I just hate the Jets. I don't even care. Aren't they due for a stinker where Sanchez sucks? I'll take Oakland.
Baltimore at St Louis (Bal by 4): The good new is that even if St Louis starts 0-4 they'll only be a game or two behind (and they're starting 0-3).
Kansas City at San Diego (SD by 15): This has a weird trap game feel to it, in my opinion. Everyone has written off Kansas City and also penciled Philip Rivers in for the MVP. But did we all forget that San Diego can't win until November? They nearly blew it to Minnesota and then did blow it to New England. But... KC has been blown out in three or four games straight (going back to last season). I don't know. I guess I'll take San Diego and then laugh if they lose this game.
Green Bay at Chicago (GB by 4): Chicago tends to elicit these weird 10-3 games when they play Green Bay. It's like Rodgers can't quite figure them out. That being said, I like the chances that Cutler is sacked three or four times early and then spends the rest of the game giving death glares to his o-line. So I'll take Green Bay.
Arizona at Seattle (Ari by 4): Eh, I'll take Seattle here, I guess. Homefield advantage. After all, if they don't win here, aren't they going 0-16?
Atlanta at Tampa Bay (TB by 1): Josh Freeman keeps doing it. And Atlanta is coming off the big "phew" game. (Although so is Tampa). But the advantage lies with Josh Freeman over Matt Ryan.
Pittsburgh at Indianapolis (Pit by 11): Man, Pittsburgh got blessed with some pretty easy games to wash that Baltimore stink off, huh? I don't think Indy is worse than Seattle, but I don't even think Pittsburgh played that well last week. So I'll take Pittsburgh here, and throw down a Lock of the Week for it.
Washington at Dallas (N/A): No line because of the Tony Romo injury. I like Dallas a little bit here, with Romo, and lean heavily towards Washington if he doesn't play. And since he probably isn't playing, I'll stick with Washington.

Fantasy Update:

Cristaball: I won 123-100 despite the Oakland D/ST putting up -4 points. This team is certainly turning out much better than I could have hoped for. Flipping Kolb and Manning each week seems to be working - although I'll be keeping Kolb for this week against Seattle.

Go Lions: I won 133-109, despite Lloyd not playing at the last minute and netting me a goose egg. Unfortunately, even in the win, I have issues, as this is my Vick team. I'm hoping to snag Fitzpatrick off of waivers; I don't like Bradford (my backup QB's) matchup this week.

Emerald City Eight: I won quite handily - 147 to 86. This is what I imagined this team doing week one. I'm hoping that was a fluke and we'll continue to rack up a lot of points - and I like this weeks matchup with Jackson and Gates playing KC.

Week 2: The Gods Must be Crazy

2011-09-12T08:12:00.000-07:00

What a strange opening weekend. I think we have no idea what the influence of the lockout will be yet; but look at this: Buffalo and Washington won handily, while Atlanta and Pittsburgh lost badly. St Louis lost not just the game but their three most important players; Green Bay might be unstoppable; and the kickoff rules still didn't help San Diego. Oh, and Indianapolis just became my favorite in the Luck-Off sweepstakes.

Speaking of the Luck-Off, I think we as an internet need to come up with a great name for the contest. When we think of the rhyming possibilities, I think we can do it.

After week one, I have decided to simplify my picks to be against the spread. Mostly because I did horrible in picking game winners. Here are my week 1 results. Note that I'm listing based on the picks I made against the spread, so I have Tennessee as a correct pick even though they lost.
Week 1 Correct Picks: Cincinnati, Buffalo, Philadelphia, Tennessee, San Francisco (lock 1-0), Washington, Dallas; Oakland; New England

Week 1 Incorrect Picks: Green Bay (upset 0-1), Atlanta, Tampa Bay, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis, San Diego
Arizona landed right on the spread of 7, so I get my pick back (it's called a push). Making the record 9-6-1.

On to the week 2 picks! (Tuesday Update: These lines are a little ridiculous. I'll highlight where below.)

Oakland at Buffalo (Buf by 4): Buffalo looked a little too good. I don't know if I believe in that yet. Yes, I know I picked them. But I still don't trust them. Although, when in doubt, take the points. I'll take the over.

Kansas City at Detroit (Det by 9): The first insane line of the day. Detroit is favored by 9 points. Nine! I can't bring myself to that. Not yet. I'll take the under.

Baltimore at Tennessee (Bal by 7): I don't know, man. It's a home game for Tennessee, so I'll take the under here as well.

Cleveland at Indianopolis (Cle by 2): I kept seeing the bottom line scroll across on Sunday, updating me on the Houston/Indy game. Every time I saw it, Houston had scored 10 more points. Was Indy really that inept, or was Houston really that good? I think Indy rights itself a bit here and somebody finally lights that Cleveland bandwagon on fire.

Tampa Bay at Minnesota (Min by 3): I'll take the over. Minnesota nearly beat a really good San Diego team. Tampa Bay wasn't really in the Detroit game.

Chicago at New Orleans (NO by 7): One team that played better than their loss suggested, and one team that played worse than their win suggested. In both of the games week one, it all hinged on turnovers. Chicago went 5/5 on recovered fumbles, including some that frankly changed the momentum of the game. New Orleans fumbled on their first possession, which then required them to go into a shootout starting down two scores (and they still almost pulled it off). This is an easy bet - New Orleans and the over.

Jacksonville at New York (NYJ by 10): I absolutely cannot believe that the Jets won on Sunday night. They seem to do that every week - win games because the other team melts down. I swear on all that is holy that I cannot stand them. My prediction for this game: Jacksonville leads a close game, up by 4, when Luke McCown runs out the back of the end zone and tries to do a reverse Lambeau leap. On the ensuing safety punt, Jacksonville botches the punt, managing to kick it backwards, and New York capitalizes with a field goal to take a 1 point lead and win. No way I'm picking the Jets by 10. I'll take the under. And this is my lock.

Seattle at Pittsburgh (Pit by 15): Here's what I can tell you: I'm writing this first draft on Monday morning without seeing the lines, and I'm taking Pittsburgh and the over. It's a perfect storm of an embarassed good team and a crappy team led by Tarvaris Jackson on the road. If they put the spread at 20, I would still have to seriously consider Pittsburgh. Also: Fantasy MVP this week will be the Pitt D/ST. (Tuesday Update: 15 points and I'm still taking the over.)

Arizona at Washington (Was by 5): It's the redemption of Rex Grossman! I only hope that because Dave has legally agreed to rename his daughter Rex Grossman Morgan if he does well. ~~So in that vein, I will take Wash and the over.~~ Scratch That. Washington beat a hurting Giants. I'll take the under.

Green Bay at Carolina (GB by 11): I'm pretty sure I saw the best team in football last Thursday. And I don't think Carolina keeps up with that. Sorry, I'm taking the points.

Dallas at San Francisco (Dal by 3): Every time I saw Rob Ryan on the sidelines, I flashbacked to Arrested Development, where in Season 2 we were introduced to George Bluth Sr's twin brother Oscar Bluth. Oscar was played by the same actor in a wig. It's the exact same - we had no idea that there was a Rob Ryan until we were already sick of Rex. I'm still not 100% convinced it's not a publicity ploy and Rex isn't running both teams. I take Dallas in spite of Tony Romo.

Cincinnati at Denver (Den by 6): Really? No respect for Cincy? Didn't Denver just lose at home to Oakland, who were supposed to be terrible, while Cincy beat Cleveland at Cleveland? And wasn't Cleveland supposed to be sneaky good? I'll take Cincy here.

Houston at Miami (Hou by 3): A tad too much respect for Miami here. Do you think Henne puts together two games in a row? Me neither. Houston.

San Diego at New England (NE by 7): Great game! I think it's too close to call, and thus I'll take San Diego. I think it's a shootout, 35-33 or similar.

Philadelphia at Atlanta (Phi by 3): Maybe a great game. Certainly would have been amazing last year, but neither of these teams looked special last week. I'll take Atlanta as my upset, because I forgot to pick one until now.

St Louis at New York (NY by 6): The infamous Injury bowl! So early in the season, and all you'll hear next Monday is how beat up these two teams are. It's disappointing, but I'm ready to write off St Louis now, and anoint San Fran as the division winner (at 6-10). St Louis has a brutal schedule, and they won't be winning here. Take the over.

Fantasy Update:

Here's the frustrating thing about Fantasy: no matter how much you prepare, sometimes you just get lucky. Or unlucky. I'm writing this before the Monday night games (and will update after), but right now here's how it looking:

Go Lions: I felt good about this team going in. Right now, I'm down 6 points. I have two players left (McFadden and Lloyd), while he has three players left (Moreno, Welker, Janikowski). Could be a coin flip, although I'm obviously disadvantaged currently. Tuesday Update: I lost by 20 points.

Emerald City Eight: I've lost badly this week, unless Tom Brady doesn't get 3 fantasy points (Tuesday Update: Well, that certainly didn't happen). My team put up 80 points, total. Thats right. My murderers row first five put up 9, 2, 15, 3, and 6 points. I only had three players get to double digits - Stafford, Jones-Drew, and the Chargers D/ST. Thats right. My defense was my third most valuable player. I'm not ready to panic yet; next week should be better.

CRISTABall: And just to illustrate the randomness of Fantasy Football... I have won this game. My autodrafted horror has put up 104 points - with my #1 pick, McFadden, still left to play (as well as two other players). Eli Manning and Steve Smith combined for more points than my opponent . Unbelievable.

Week 1: The NFL is Back... And So Am I, Baby!

2011-09-08T08:55:00.000-07:00

I know you missed me. Life's been crazy. And I've been lazy. Let's just get right to it.

This season, I will be picking the winner of each game, as well as picking against the spread. If you don't know what the spread is, I will explain it now. Vegas predicts who will win by a point margin - so, for example, they might say "Green Bay by 3.5." Your job is to bet on the over or under - for example, does Green Bay win by more than 3.5, or less than 3.5? Green Bay covers if they win by 4 or more, they win but don't cover if they win by 3 or less, etc. If teams are evenly matched, the line is usually three points to the home team. If they are unevenly matched, the line will be higher (or so low that the away team becomes favored, creating a home underdog or "homedog"). If the team wins by the exact margin, then the pick doesn't count and you get your money back. So that's the spread system in an nutshell.

I will be getting all of my spreads from the ESPN.com NFL scoreboard page. Don't know how accurate it is, but it's where I'm going. On to the picks - and a fantasy section at the end.

Saints at Packers (GB by 4.5)
The Lions aren't the only one's with the great bandwagon. I actually saw an article on ESPN wondering if the Packers are a dynasty. Please... I like them as much as anyone else. It was great fun to watch them beat the Steelers. But they won one superbowl. It sounds an awful lot like the year before actually, when everyone was ready to anoint New Orleans the permanent NFL champions forever. Just because they beat a team that we all hate in the Superbowl doesn't mean we should lose our minds. So I'm taking my Upset of the Week here and taking New Orleans to win outright.

Falcons at Bears (ATL by 3)
Not a fan of either of these teams this year, but I don't know that Chicago could keep up with Atlanta if ATL wants to try a shootout with Roddy White and Julio Jones. I'll take ATL to cover.

Bengals at Browns (CLE by 7)
The Annual Ohio Puke-Off. I hope to God this game isn't on TV, even if the Browns are supposedly a decent sleeper team. I think I'll pick Cleveland to win but not to cover...

Bills at Chiefs (KC by 6)
The Bills might actually be sneaky decent. Everyone thinks they should take Luck, but it's not like Fitzpatrick was horrible last year. I like the Bills to keep it close here, but still lose. So I take the under.

Eagles at Rams (Phi by 5.5)
Two pretty good NFC teams. I don't have to play Vick in any of my leagues this week, so I'm feeling confident he won't do very well. But then again, I don't think I can name a player on the STL defense, so I'll take Philly to cover the spread.

Lions at Buccanneers (TB by 1)
Two bandwagons are pretty full: the Lions bandwagon, and the "I just jumped off the Lions Bandwagon because it's too full" bandwagon. I don't agree with this line; I don't think the Lions are two points better than the Bucs. If the line was TB by 4, I would have to think about it. As it is, I'm gonna have to take the Bucs and hope I'm wrong.

As a side note, the last time I was this optimistic about a Lion's season, they had just gone 4-0 through the preseason, and I was excited to watch them tear apart a rookie quarterback - Matt Ryan. They promptly lost badly and went 0-16. The lesson, as always for Lion's fans, is don't hope.

Titans at Jaguars (Jac by 3)
I'm pretty sure this line is incorrect, as it probably doesn't account for Jacksonville's QB situation. But it's what ESPN has today (Thursday) so I'll take the gift and pick Ten.

Steelers at Ravens (Bal by 2)
Everyone's predicting a decline for the Ravens, and I am too. Because I'm sick of Flacco, and his dumb face. So I predict the Steelers to win.

Colts at Texans (Hou by 9)
I think Houston will win, but I'm not willing to bet it would be by 10 points. Collins isn't bad, he's just not Peyton Manning. I think Indy will keep it close, maybe lose by a touchdown.

Panthers at Cardinals (Ari by 7)
Well, so far, I've only picked one home team to cover. Time to start working that average back up. Panthers are terrible, and while I have a sinking feeling in my stomach whenever I think of Kevin Kolb, I'm betting he has a decent coming out party. Who wouldn't want to play Carolina week one?

Vikings at Chargers (SD by 9)
Everyone is predicting that Philip Rivers is going to have a monster game. I wasn't able to snag Rivers in any of my leagues (he was my third ranked quarterback), but I do have Vincent Jackson and Antonio Gates in a couple. I'm hoping that goes well for me. On the flip side, I also have AP, which I agonized about because I hate my first round pick giving me 6 points on week 1. Anyway, I pick the Chargers to win by a mile and cover.

Seahawks at 49ers (SF by 6)
I read an amazing stat today. The Seahawks lose by an average of 5-6 points on the road and win by an average of 6 points at home - a swing of 12 points. They even used that advantage to beat New Orleans last year in the playoffs. But there's your line right there, right? Seahawks losing by 6 on the road. So I'll take San Fran to cover - heck, I'll make it my lock.

Giants at Redskins (NYG by 3)
Who is left to play defense for the Giants? I don't know at this point. I think Shanahan will have the Redskins in decent shape (minus Rexy Grossman), so I don't think NY will cover. I think Washington will win. The whole homedog thing, ya know?

Cowboys at Jets (NYJ by 4.5)
You know, I hate the Jets. I really do. But I'm not a fan of the Cowboys. Here's my thinking in this game: Dallas can be explosive on offense. Jets, not so much. If the Dallas gets ahead (which isn't a surefire possibility with Revis on the field), the Jets can't catch up. So I'm taking Dallas.

Patriots at Dolphins (NE by 7)
Patriots. Would take the patriots at 10. 14 would be a fair place to set the line on bets where I would have to start considering NE not covering.

Raiders at Broncos (Den by 3)
I'm gonna get burned bad by picking so many road teams and stuff, but I don't like Denver this year. I like Oakland here. Jeez, may I never type that again.

Fantasy Football Preview:
I have three teams this year. Here they are:

Cristaball League:
Autodrafted last in a 16 team league:
Darren Mcfadden; Steven Jackson; Felix Jones; Benjarvus Green Ellis; Eli Manning; Steve Smith (Car); Robert Meachem; Braylon Edwards; Donovan McNabb; Mike Williams (Sea); Aaron Hernandez; Nate Burleson; Devin Hester; Kevin Ogletree; Raiders D/ST; Jason Hanson

Well, I hate this team. Quarterbacks suck, receivers are negligible, no real strengths. My RB's aren't bad, but for some reason this league was capped at 4. Weird. I also got two receivers that have the same name as other receivers, but I got the crappy versions.

The good news? In one hilarious turn of events, somebody dropped Kevin Kolb to pick up Carson Palmer(!). I immediately dropped McNabb and added Kolb. Now, I look and they have picked up McNabb. Suckers. This is also the guy I'm playing week 1, and I'm still only projected to win by 4 (and he's sitting MJD for... Ladainian Tomlinson?)

Go Lions:
I liked my team here. Last pick in a ten man league. Note: this isn't the order I drafted them in.

Michael Vick; Darren McFadden; Ahmad Bradshaw; Marques Colston; Vincent Jackson; Tony Gonzalez; Brandon Lloyd; Sam Bradford; Joseph Addai; Michael Bush; Nate Burleson; Devery Henderson; Steve Johnson; Billy Cundiff; New Orleans.

I wanted Vick in this league, and was going to take him wherever I ended up. He fell to me at 10th, which was amazing. And then I just stocked up on RB's and WR's, while stealing Sam Bradford as a great backup.

I'm pretty pumped about this team. Pretty sure I'm one of the top two.

Emerald City Eight:

The jewel of my crown. First pick in an 8 team league.

Adrian Peterson, Rashard Mendenhall, Maurice Jones Drew, Antonio Gates, Vincent Jackson, Marques Colston, Jeremy Maclin, Fred Jackson, Shonn Greene, Santana Moss, Matt Stafford, Julio Jones, CJ Spiller, Kevin Kolb, Chargers D/ST, Mason Crosby.

I purposefully encouraged a run on QB's early, knowing I could get a decent one in the later rounds. Vick went 2nd overall, and Rodgers 7th, and Brady 8th. And so I just sat back and picked up amazing players. Look at my first five picks - thats a murderers row. My only regret is getting two Buffalo RB's (they were the best RB's left on the board, with nothing much else to work with). I'm trying to trade Greene and Kolb for Roethlisberger and Lee Evans to a running back needy team, so we'll see how that goes. I'm risking it a bit by taking Stafford, but I have to be a homer every now and again.

And that's the end, ladies and gentlemen. Let the season begin.

Game 7!

2011-06-15T11:11:00.000-07:00

I return for a brief look at and thought about Game 7's.

Tonight features a Game 7 between the Boston Bruins and the Vancouver Canucks. Winners get their names engraved on Lord Stanley's Cup.

Who I will be rooting for? The underdog Boston Bruins. Vancouver has come across too much like thugs in this series - biting fingers, giving concussions, offering advice, getting their goalie pulled. Boston has been exemplary - the best example being Tim Thomas, a hard working guy from Flint MI who has refused to play the media game and make fun of Luongo (despite Luongo most assuredly deserving it).

I remember three of Detroits recent Game 7's. I was too young for the Game 7 in 1997 with Stevie Y's overtime goal against St Louis. The first Game 7 I remember watching in nervous anticipation was 2002 when Detroit faced their hated rivals - the Colorado Avalanche. It was a nervewracking experience. Detroit had played a perfect game 6, and still only won because of two mistakes by Patrick Roy, a goaltender who didn't make mistakes. I remember thinking how it would go down to the last second, and it would be nervewracking.

We won 7-0, and the game was never in doubt. We chased (Patricia) Roy and started singing "Sweet Caroline" as we started mentally playing the Hurricanes. I smiled for days. Even now, I put in the DVD of that game if I want to have a little mental pick-me-up. Nothing compares to winning a Game 7.

I remember watching two other game 7's. 2009, when Detroit lost 2-0 to Pittsburgh, and 2011, when Detroit lost 3-2. Those were sucker punch games, where everything you fear comes to hit you in the face. 2009 was particularly devastating, as we lost the Stanley Cup to snot-nosed Cindy Crosby. I called in sick to work the next day and don't remember having a single conversation with my then fiance for three days.

My point is this - Game 7 will make or break you. Boston or Vancouver fans, enjoy this moment of reprieve. Because in 6 or 7 hours, the game of nerves will start. Whoever blinks first will lose. The game will stay with you, win or loss.

(p.s. I bet ten bucks Vancouver riots, win or loss).

Madcap NHL Conference Semifinal Picks

2011-04-28T09:16:00.000-07:00

I went 6-2 in the first round, and came within two goals of 8-0. But hey, Pittsburgh is out! Whoo! Although we'll have to listen to them whine about how far they would have gone with Cindy...

Anyway, on to the conference semifinal picks:

Eastern Conference:

Washington versus Tampa Bay - TB should be exhausted. Washington is rested and good, and should manhandle the Lightning in 5.

Philadelphia versus Boston - Another rough series. I see this going seven, and Washington walking through the winner for the finals. I'll take Philadelphia in seven.

Western Conference:

Vancouver versus Nashville - Nashville in 6! Vancouver got pushed to the brink and I don't think they match up well against Nashville.

San Jose versus Detroit - Not even being a homer, but this will be the best series to watch this round. These teams are very close in talent and skill; but I'll give the edge to Detroit (duh) because San Jose barely beat LA. They won three games in OT - not exactly a ringing endorsement.

Sets up Detroit versus Nashville and Washington versus Philadelphia.

Drama Ensues

2011-04-27T09:32:00.000-07:00

Ever feel inundated?

This week has suddenly become "Family Drama" week. Seriously, it's worse than a Lifetime special. Shall we go with bulleted points? I think so:

My father hasn't talked to my brother in months, maybe years? Including not bothering to call or facebook him on his Birthday. Oh, and my dad remarried, which is good but weird
This has led my brother to take to facebook, saying how he "hates my ******* dad"
My 15 year old cousin was recently expelled for drug activity, and refuses to give up said drugs
My 45ish aunt is pregnant, even though she can't/doesn't really take care of her two kids she has. The father used to be married to someone else. Oh, and this was purposeful on my Aunt after she miscarried a baby just last year.
My grandfather Joe is probably dying, but since he has alienated most of his family, no one really cares.
The only people who do care are those he hasn't alienated, who are upset at the rest of the family for not visiting/calling Joe
My 18 year old sister is pregnant, and the father is a guy who has cheated on her multiple times and recently had the facebook status "there's something about a girl saying no that makes me want to rape her lol"

I think that about covers it. Mind you, that's really only my side. I could bring in a few of Jess's family members too, but this seems like a good list.

What do I feel about all of this? Pressure. I'm the guy that my family thinks to rely on. Here's a solid example - I got a call from my cousin Andrea the other night regarding the Grandpa Joe situation. I was expecting her to yell at me because I, like most of the rest, have not called this man that I don't have a relationship with (I can seriously count the number of times I've seen him on one hand, and remember one conversation). I braced myself to be yelled at, only to discover that she was calling me because I was a "peacemaker" and she wanted me to say something to the rest of my cousins, so that they would hopefully visit/call Joe.

It reminds me of when my mom died, and I was the one who wasn't really allowed to break down. I needed to be the strong one, carry my dad, be there for my family. Take the lead, help make decisions, etc. I know that I put some of that on myself, but it was still there, undeniable.

I remember a conversation with a pastor who said that my entire family was "looking to me and wondering, whether or not I was about to break down. Be strong for them."

I don't know that this post has much of a point, other than to rail against that. I don't always want to be that guy. But I will be, as much as I can.

P.S. If you're someone involved in one of those bulleted points reading this, I'm sorry if you feel offended. Feel free to call and talk about it sometime.

Madcap NHL Playoff Picks

2011-04-13T09:13:00.000-07:00

First, a confession: I don't want much NHL these days. It's hard to find in Seattle. I know of one sports bar that shows games, and it's in the U-District. So my observations and picks will be based mostly on wishes and on bias. Pretty much like everything else I do. I'm hoping to catch games online - we'll see how it goes. So here's my Madcap Picks for the first round.

Eastern Conference:

1. Washington Capitals vs 8. New York Rangers - Will the Capitals finally get it, in the playoffs? Will Ovechkin become a great postseason player? I'm thinking the Caps dispose of their playoff demons (for now) and win this in 5.

2. Philadelphia Flyers vs 7. Buffalo Sabres - This is probably the most commonly picked "upset" round this year. A lot of analysts are picking the Sabres because the Flyers are hurting and not playing well. Rule of thumb: anytime most people agree on an upset, it's not going to happen. I'll take Philly in 6.

3. Boston Bruins vs 6. Montreal Canadiens - This promises to be a brutal series, after the hit that Chara put on Pacioretty just a month ago. These two teams hate each other. And that spells a seven game series to me. I'll take Montreal to come in and shock the Bruin's faithful in Boston in Game 7.

4. Pittsburgh Penguins vs 5. Tampa Bay Lightning - I don't know what to expect in this series. Will Crosby show up? I'm pretty sure if Pittsburgh falls behind in the series or faces elimination he'll be there. I'm cheering on Tampa Bay, but it's not a wise idea to pick against home ice and against experience... Pittsburgh in 6.

Western Conference

1. Vancouver Canucks vs 8.Chicago Blackhawks - Ah geez. I hope this goes 7 and these two teams cream each other. I'm picking Vancouver in 5 though.

2. San Jose Sharks vs 7. Los Angeles Kings - San Jose in 5. Kopitar is hurt, and San Jose is a good team.

3. Detroit Red Wings vs 6. Phoenix Coyotes - Rematch, huh? So if Detroit took 7 games to beat Phoenix last year, without home ice and banged up, I think I'll take Detroit in 6 this year.

4. Anaheim Ducks vs 5. Nashville Predators - Sort of the afterthought series, even if it includes probable MVP Corey Perry. Both of these teams fly under the radar. I'll take Nashville in 6.

So that sets up round 2:

Washington vs Montreal

Philadelphia vs Pittsburgh

Vancouver vs Nashville

San Jose vs Detroit (ouch)

Here's the thing... I don't see Detroit winning it this year. The Western Conference is very strong, with too many teams that seem to have Detroit's number. Vancouver, San Jose, and Chicago are teams we definitely do not want, and it's not like Nashville or Anaheim are good for our health. Our best bet is Vancouver wins, LA wins, and Nashville wins first round. Then we draw Nashville and hope that LA can beat up Vancouver. Basically, to set up a cherry second round, we're looking for an LA round one victory - the one thing that's pretty much guaranteed not to happen.

Also, we don't have Colorado to beat up this year. Maybe the Wings are bluffing - they've been coasting for a few weeks and are ready to turn it on for the playoffs (see: 2002 playoffs). Or maybe they won't turn it on in time (see: 2001 playoffs). We'll see.

Writing a Killer Shark Novel (or making a Killer Shark Movie)

2011-04-11T12:17:00.000-07:00

This might be one of my bucket list things. Write a great Killer Shark Novel. I love killer shark books and movies, and I love them even more when they are done well. Jaws is a great read and a great movie, and is obviously the pinnacle of anything killer shark related. At the bottom end, we have schlock like Sci-Fi channel specials ("Mega-Shark versus Giant Octopus!" or my new favorite "Sharktopus!") and we also have the bottom end of literature - Steve Alten's Meg sequels (the first was pretty good, but they pretty quickly nosedive into schlock).

Let's look at two common problems that Killer Shark Novels face, and see if we can't brainstorm a way around them.

1. The Setting. Sharks live in water. Duh. Shark attacks, therefore, happen in water. So the first problem we have to deal with is why don't our protagonists just stay out of the water. We have a few approaches. Jaws, for instance, needs the beaches open for economic reasons. This is the most basic motivation - we can't get all the people out of the water in time, for some reason. So we have a quest to kill the beast before it kills others.

There are a couple other ways to get around this setting issue. For one, we can always go the route of White Shark (by Peter Benchley) - the shark evolves(!) lungs and can then walk and attack on land. Those wacky Nazis!

There's also Deep Blue Sea method - bring the setting to the sharks! In Deep Blue Sea, the laboratory the scientists are working on sinks and the sharks get in. It gets even crazier / cooler in the proposed sequel Deep Red Sea (which never materialized) - where a tower would fall into the ocean and sink partially, allowing the sharks to attack a hotel.

2. The Creature. Generally, we have to start looking at larger sharks for them to be a serious and continual threat to human beings. Sharks under 10 feet, whilst still possessing sharp and dangerous teeth, are not usually regarded as a terrible threat. Under 20 feet, and we may not be looking a repeat or multiple offender. Once we're at that 20 feet threshold, we have a creature that's large enough to do damage and one that considers a human being a proper sized meal. Unfortunately, sharks rarely get that large. When you rule out rather benign species, we're looking at Great Whites, as a rule of thumb.

We could always genetically engineer a smaller shark to be larger (Deep Blue Sea) or resurrect an extinct shark (Meg), but this runs us into other problems. Genetic engineering pigeonholes us into a story about... the perils of genetic engineering. And the extinct sharks we deal with (primarily the Megalodon) tend to be too large. The main shark in the Meg series is 72 feet long; at that point, eating humans is a waste of energy.

I suppose a school or swarm of smaller sharks would be dangerous as well, but thats basically the plot of Piranha. And even small sharks can be dangerous if there's no way to escape them or fend them off (Open Water).

So there we go. The two common stretches that we'd need to make to create worthwhile Killer Shark Story. We need a setting and we need a creature. The setting gives us the excuse for the creature. There are two ways to make the Killer Shark Story memorable - take existing tropes/settings/creature and write it really well - or use a new setting/creature.

A new creature tends to be outlandish - look at all the Sci-Fi specials out there. So what do we have for a new setting? What ways can we think of to bring the humans to the sharks (Or vice versa)?

NHL: Bias Ranking

2011-04-04T12:46:00.000-07:00

In the spirit of my NFL Bias Rankings, I present to you the first ever annual NHL Bias Rankings. As I said for the NFL Rankings:

"They're just like power rankings, but intentionally skewed to the teams that I am biased towards or against. So at the higher end you'll have teams that I hate and thus tend to root and pick against. Lower numbers more directly correspond to teams that I root for."

I'll be inventing whole new divisions (separate from the NFL Divisions). Without any further ado, here we go!

The Turtle Division

30. Pittsburgh Penguins

29. Colorado Avalanche

28. Chicago Blackhawks

Named after this particular fighting style - "The Turtle." As you can see, dirty coward Claude Lemieux has decided to fight Darren McCarty by hiding his head and trying to not get hurt. Epitome of cowardice and disgrace. For this division, we have Pittsburgh, Colorado, and Chicago. Colorado is on principle; as the employer of Claude Lemieux. They haven't really been a rivalry in years - and the last attempt to convince loyal Red Wings that they were a rival was the playoff series where Johan Franzen singlehandedly outscored the entire Colorado team (2008, nine goals to eight). Pittsburgh is on this list for employing Sidney Crosby, who I am willing to bet will not miss a single playoff game. What a weasel. And Chicago had no fans before taking the easy road to the Stanley Cup last year. Nowadays, you have to watch to not get crushed underneath the bandwagon.

The Put Up or Shut Up Division

27. San Jose Sharks

26. Nashville Predators

25. Vancouver Canucks

Seriously. If you can't win a Stanley Cup, don't even try to pretend you're any good. Doesn't matter if you get into the playoffs every year.

The Mel Gibson Division

24. Anaheim Ducks

23. Ottawa Senators

22. St Louis Blues

Can't like them on principle. Might have been cool in the past, but nowadays they're just spewing nonsense. Blue's get here for being a rival; Ducks are here for what I'm sure was black magic voodoo for their cup run (Pretty convinced Giguere had cellophane wrapped around the goal, with the way pucks would bounce out rather than in). And Ottawa... well, they probably deserve to be in the Put Up or Shut Up division, but they're from a province of Canada that comes across as snobby and pretentious. Pretentious Canadians? Unbelievable.

The Contraction Division

21. Florida Panthers

20. Atlanta Thrashers

19. Carolina Hurricanes

18. Columbus Blue Jackets

17. Minnesota Wild

If we combined all of these teams into just two teams, I'd be okay with that. Florida/Atlanta/Carolina become the Southeastern Thrashing Hurricanes. Columbus and Minnesota become the Minnesota Blue Stars. With that, the NHL goes to 27 teams, we put one in more in Canada (for a total of 28), and we can go to 4 divisions. Piece of cake.

The New York Division

16. New York Rangers

15. New York Islanders

14. New Jersey Devils

13. Buffalo Sabres

I can't think of why I don't like these teams, except that they're New York teams. My hatred of Yankees and Giants may be rubbing through. I do like Buffalo and New Jersey, mainly because they've both had amazing goaltenders (Hasek and Brodeur).

The Canadian Division

12. Edmonton Oilers

11. Calgary Flames

10. Montreal Canadiens

9. Boston Bruins

Isn't Boston in Canada? These are teams I wish were better, because they have a good rich history of hockey. Or they're canadian.

The Michael Biehn Division

8. Phoenix Coyotes

7. Philadelphia Flyers

6. Los Angeles Kings

I vaguely remember these teams from the playoffs years ago, and possibly winning the Stanley Cup through them. It was so long ago though that I don't recognize them any longer. It's like Michael Biehn - you certainly remember him from growing up with Aliens and Terminator and The Abyss, but if you saw him today you wouldn't have the foggiest idea who he was.

The Elephant Ear Division

5. Dallas Stars

4. Washington Capitals

3. Toronto Maple Leafs

Guilty pleasures, all. Shouldn't like them, but I do. Dallas had Mike Modano for awhile; perhaps in the top three of classy captains of all time (behind Yzerman and Messier). Capitals were always a fun team (and Ovechkin is a real player, unlike Crosby). And Toronto? I wish they were a team we met in the playoffs a lot. That would be a fun rivalry to reignite.

The Karl Urban Division

2. Tampa Bay Lightning

Surprisingly delightful. I've always enjoyed them, and now that their manager is good ole Stevie Y, I find myself rooting for them. They'll be in the playoffs this year, and that would a great matchup for the Stanley Cup Finals.

The Home Team

1. Detroit Red Wings

Flatout the most dominant team in hockey in the last 20 years. Since 1997, we've had 4 Stanley Cups. We've won the Central Division 9 out of the last 10 years. We're on our 10th straight 100 point season (NHL record, and active). We're also on 20 straight years in the playoffs.

And thus, the NHL Bias Rankings. I realized that because I care more about Hockey, and actually have a team that's worth supporting, there are a lot more villains than there are heroes. In football, it's about 50/50. In hockey, I like approximately 1/6 of the teams. I thought this would be a good primer, and also a good start for my NHL predictions (as the playoffs are only a week away). Go Wings!

Love Wins Review: Part 2

2011-03-25T08:53:00.000-07:00

Another great chapter, and one that many people seem to be skipping in their reviews, in favor of getting to the juicer and more controversial stuff! This chapter is called "Here is the New There" and it's a discussion of heaven.

In this chapter, Rob takes some time to discuss what heaven is. What did Jesus think about heaven? What does the Bible say about heaven? I've heard that it's much like N.T. Wright's "Surprised by Hope" (haven't read it); but I'll summarize Rob for you.

Heaven is right now, somewhere else. This is our traditional understanding of heaven - that it is in fact somewhere, right now, out of our field of understanding.

But Heaven is also right here, sometime in the future. Heaven will be on Earth (Revelation talks of Heaven coming down to Earth). So there is at least potential, where we are, for Heaven.

And finally, the least understood aspect of Heaven, is that we are invited to create heaven here and now, in this moment, in this place.

That's a quick summary of the chapter. One common criticism I have read of "Love Wins" is Rob's use of the greek word "Aion." Aion is most commonly translated as "forever." However, Rob wants to drag us back to some of the other meanings of the word - "eternal" It can also refer to "a particular intensity of experience that transcends time." I know just enough greek to be dangerous, so I can only make a small comment. What some of the greek scholars and theologians on the internet seem to be taking Bell to task for (choosing a meaning based on what fits his thoughts best) can be turned around very easily. I don't know what the correct translation of Aion is in these passages - but I don't think that vitriol or belittlement is deserved either way.

No matter how you define Aion, the rest of Rob's points hold pretty well in this chapter. He hasn't (yet) gotten away from much in the way of orthodox belief; he is simply using words and phrases at this point that we are unfamiliar with.

Two more things I want to discuss about this chapter: Rob talks about the "flames of heaven" and how in the light of perfect love and perfect judgement how uncomfortable we'll feel. Imagine being a racist in heaven, and realizing that 'those' people are here too. Rob talks about how these parts of ourselves, the sinful dark areas, will be burned away by the light of God's love. It's still a learning experience, Rob believes, because we are not instantly an entirely different person upon death. "Heaven is a starting over. Learning how to be human all over again..."

Also, Rob touches on superstring theory a bit, which made me smile, because it's one of my favorite concepts and ideas. For more of my thoughts, and a basic idea of superstring theory and what it means, check this post out.

Next chapter is simply "Hell."

Love Wins Review: Part 1

2011-03-24T09:35:00.000-07:00

After much reading and much talk, I finally got my copy of "Love Wins: A book about Heaven, Hell, and the fate of every person who ever lived" by Rob Bell.

A quick primer, for those of you who didn't catch wind of anything. Rob Bell is the founding pastor of the church I used to go to in Michigan (Mars Hill Bible Church, which is not related to Mars Hill Church/Mark Driscoll). Rob has written a few other great books (Velvet Elvis, Sex God, Jesus Wants To Save Christians). This one achieved a very controversial status after Rob posted a promotional video for Love Wins, with people accusing Rob of heresy and universalism. You can find the gamut of opinions and responses if you look on the internet, but I thought I would offer my thoughts on the book. I'm going to go through the book chapter by chapter and talk about my responses, the controversies as I understand them, and what I think is important in what I'm reading.

The first chapter (What about the Flat Tire?) is in my opinion the best. It reiterates some of the points from the video - "Gandhi's in Hell? Really? And someone knows that for sure?" And then Rob, in typical Rob fashion, goes to town. He just starts asking questions, sharing biblical stories, and highlighting what different stories say about salvation. For example he gives the following list, with each idea coming from how different biblical stories related someones salvation:

“So is it what we say,

or is it who we are,

or is what we do,

or is it what we say we’re going to do,

or is it who your friends are,

or who you’re married to,

or whether you give birth to children?

Or is what questions you’re asked?

Or is what questions you ask in return?”

And that's really all this chapter offers. Stories and the questions that arise from them. And at the end of the chapter, Rob says that this isn't a book of questions, and it's time to start looking at some answers.

One criticism I've heard of Rob is that he asks questions but doesn't provide answers. Well, the end of this chapter was a huge relief in that regard - no, Love Wins isn't going to just poke holes in salvation, ask questions and provide no answers.

I do think this is the most important chapter in the book. Whether or not you agree with the picture that Rob paints from here on out, you have to recognize that the area that we try to plant the flag of our faith on is not as much as a rock as we want it to. There are confusing and contradictory images of how we are saved, and these are in the Bible. We need to recognize that and think about it.

Next Chapter: Here is the New There

Elements of Story: Plot

2011-03-16T08:46:00.000-07:00

I did a recent little series on story telling, where I told three stories and asked you to help me analyze them. I outlined four key essentials to any story - a place, a plot, people, and conflict. Now I'm interested in working through those essentials and would like to start with Plot.

Don't start with plot as the basis of your story, first off. The basis of your story should be your characters - the natural conflict in your characterizations will lead to your plot. I'm starting with plot now because I already have an idea of what to say.

Most plots can be broken down into a plot archetype. There are many ways of identifying the different plot archetypes, and I've narrowed it down to this particular list of seven (By Christopher Booker).

Overcoming the Monster - the protagonist learns of a great evil and sets out to destroy it. (Terminator)
Rags to Riches - the protagonist moves from a place of oppression to a place of glory. (Aladdin)
The Quest - the protagonist learns of something that must be done/received and sets out to do it. (Indiana Jones)
Voyage and Return - the protagonist leaves his calm and peaceful world and enters a place of adventure, only to return as a more mature individual (Inception)
Comedy - the protagonist is prevented from reaching his goal (usually marriage) by the opposition, and is finally allowed to get his happy ending (The Princess Bride)
Tragedy - not the opposite of a comedy, but the opposite of overcoming the monster; the protagonist spirals down into darkness, eventually becoming the monster (Macbeth)
Rebirth - the protagonist begins a downward spiral into darkness (like in a tragedy), but repents and is 'reborn' (Let's go with Star Wars, and Anakin Skywalker in particular)

Obviously, stories can have elements of all these plots in them. The larger the story, the more plots it will contain. "Lord of the Rings" taps on all 7 of these plots at some point; "Jaws" taps on three to five; "Little Red Riding Hood" really only has one or two.

Now we have 7 types of stories. We need to evaluate what stories we are telling and what categories they fit into. This can help us 'lean' down stories and trim the fat of filler. For example, if I was trying to tell a story about a young man who sets out to fight a grizzly bear, I would want to trim the focus from his relationships or his finances, as though are different types of stories.

This can help us focus on our lives as well - what types of stories are we leading? Are we slowly edging into a tragedy - becoming our parents?!? Are we focused only on the rags to riches, trying to climb a corporate ladder? Do we view our lives as a comedy, where everything conspires against us and we must strive to get our happy ending? And if we like the story we're telling, perhaps we need to cut out the parts that don't add to the story, so we can tell a better story.

I want a great story for my life (and for the stories I tell). I want an epic story like "Lord of the Rings," not a cgi-filled yet empty and meaningless story like "Transformers."

Strengths: Communication

2011-03-14T12:39:00.000-07:00

Strength #1: Communication

Wait, what does that mean? I find it easy to put my thoughts into words. I'm a good conversationalist and presenter.I am rarely tongue-tied; and find ways to present my ideas in reasonable, sequential, and methodical ways. I am a storyteller.

How do I use this knowledge? Suggested action steps:

Consider publishing your work.

Volunteer for opportunities to present.

Spend words wisely and monitor their impact.

Develop knowledge and expertise in specific areas.

Leading with Communication: Find ways to build others up, in writing. Offer praise and collect success stories.

Roles in which I would succeed: Marketing, sales, ministry, or media.

Strengths: Strategic

2011-03-09T10:54:00.000-08:00

Strength #2: Strategic

Wait, what does that mean? I am talented in finding alternate ways to proceed. I can quickly spot relevant patterns and issues. I develop action plans, sometimes finding solutions before others can even understand the question. I have little to no interest in repeating the mistakes of the past.

How do I use this knowledge? Suggested action steps:

Because I can see repercussions ahead of time, plan my range of responses in detail.

Consider all possible paths toward making a vision a reality - think of all potential obstacles.

Help others understand that I'm not a naysayer - I'm trying to examine how to accomplish the idea.

Trust my intuitive insights

Leading with Strategic: Discuss options candidly and thoroughly with all involved. Apply strategic thinking with relationships - map out how to invest and build the relationships with those who have the most influence in my life. Use my gift to see ways when others think it's hopeless.

Roles in which I would succeed: Management, producers, entrepreneurs

Song to Chew on

2011-03-02T11:14:00.000-08:00

Found this song strangely compelling yesterday:

Put your dreams away for now
I won’t see you for some time
I am lost in my mind
I get lost in my mind

Momma once told me
You’re already home where you feel love
I am lost in my mind
I get lost in my mind

Oh my brother
Your wisdom is all that I need
Oh my brother
Don’t you worry ‘bout me
Don’t you worry
Don’t you worry
Don’t worry about me

How’s that bricklayin’ coming
How’s your engine running
Is that bridge getting built
Are your hands getting filled

Won’t you tell me my brother
Cause there are stars up above
We can start moving forward

How’s that bricklayin’ coming
How’s your engine running
Is that bridge getting built
Are your hands getting filled

Won’t you tell me my brother
Cause there are stars up above
We can start moving forward

Lost in my mind
Lost in my mind
Oh I get Lost in my mind
Lost, I get lost, I get lost in my mind
Lost in my mind
Yes I get lost in my mind
Lost, I get lost, I get lost
Oh I get lost
Oh I get

Strengths: Input

2011-03-01T14:17:00.000-08:00

Strength #3: Input

Wait, what does that mean? I have a desire to know more; a lust to collect and archive information. I like to read - a lot, and collect what I read. (Helps explain why I have such a large collection of books!)

How do I use this knowledge? Suggested action steps:

Devise a system to store and easily locate information.

"Input without output can lead to stagnation." - Be aware of who can use the knowledge and use my other gifts to get the knowledge to them.

Schedule time to read books and articles that stimulate you.

Increase your vocabulary.

Roles in which I would succeed: Teaching, Research, Journalism

Something To Think About

2011-02-28T11:29:00.000-08:00

Been on vacation for the last week or so, so excuse the lack of posts. I meant to put up a post explaining why there would be no posts, but then I realized that was stupid.

Anyway, today's post is a "think and chew" post. Here's a video of Rob Bell describing his next book - a few of the questions he's planning to wrestle with. What do you think?

Strengths: Woo

2011-02-18T09:32:00.000-08:00

Strength #4: Woo

Wait, what does that mean? Woo apparently stands for "Winning others over." I derive satisfaction from meeting new people and making connections.I 'exude an exuberant outlook towards life' while 'regale people with illuminating accounts of incidents in my life.' Basically - I like being around people and charming them.

How do I use this knowledge? Suggested action steps:

Deliberately build the network of people who know me.

Learn the names of as many people as I can.

Whenever possible, be one of the first people others meet.

Practice ways to charm and engage others.

Partner with a person who is skilled in relating or empathy, so they can grow the relationships I cultivate.

Practice telling stories. I want to be a great storyteller (which relates to another one of my upcoming talents, hint hint), and to do that I need to practice more - identify what elements of story work and what don't.

Roles in which I would succeed: A job in which I can interact with many people over the course of a day (receptionist?)

I think this relates to how I am interested in small group communities.I like being in group settings and charming people. It reminds me of conversations my wife and I had when we were getting married - because she is very skilled in relating and empathizing (not my cup of tea, by any means). We were excited about the partnership - because she can relate one on one, and I can relate in group settings. I'm excited to see that identified as a positive step, and one I've started working on.

Strengths: Adaptability

2011-02-16T15:56:00.000-08:00

I recently took a "Strengths Finder 2.0" strengths assessment test. You buy this book which gives you a code to take the test online. It's 120 questions, or something, and the questions are all "continuum" questions. There are two statements on a line, and you have to choose which statement is more true. Frequently the statements don't seem to be related or contradictory, which is supposed to help you split the hair a little better.

So for the next week or two, I'm going to be reviewing my results, one 'talent' at a time. (They give your top 5). I'll count up from the bottom.

Strength #5: Adaptability

Wait, what does that mean? I go with the flow. (It's true. Most people know me as a rather easy-going fellow, one who doesn't make waves.) Gallup says that I tend to make plans through the day, but refuse to be held to an inflexible and rigid schedule.

This puts words to something I feel - why I prefer to drive everywhere almost exclusively. I don't like being somewhere at someone else's whim - I want the freedom to adapt and move where I want.

How do I use this knowledge? A few suggested action steps:

Don't let others abuse your inherent flexibility. Cultivate your reputation as a calm and reassuring person. Seek roles in which success depends on responding to constantly changing circumstances. Openly use your reassuring demeanor to soothe disgruntled friends or coworkers.

Roles in which I would succeed: Live action television/radio, customer service, emergency response.

One thing that the guy who introduced the program mentioned about this survey is that for many people, taking Strengths Finder isn't a revelation of their skills or talents - it's a vocabulary lesson, helping put words to feelings and actions that have already been apparent. I certainly feel this way about this talent.

On Provision

2011-02-10T10:04:00.000-08:00

A friend recently wrote a blog post about discovering the ways that God will bless him this year. I read it and wished that I would start to see that in my life.

And then my car broke. And life was paused.

And so my wife and I prayed for miracles, for solutions, for answers. We didn't have 3 grand to fix the car, but we needed a way to get around. We shared our need for cash and our need for rides with our communities, and lo and behold, our needs were met and answered.

Over the space of three weeks, we only took the bus three times. Neither of us needed to miss work or school once - because people blessed us with rides.

After making our needs known, we were gifted with 1500 dollars to help repair our car - with only 300 needing to be paid back.

And then, to top it off, I found an auto-repair shop that would be able to save me about 800 dollars on the repair. I brought the car there to get the repair done (a head-gasket replacement).

They called me about four hours after I brought it in. They couldn't find a leak in the head-gasket. Instead, there was an issue with the fan-cooling relay that would cause the car to leak fluid and look like a head-gasket issue. They repaired that for about 10% of the original estimate. I saved 2800 dollars, and was able to afford to repair the brakes as well.

We'll even be able to give back a majority of the money that was gifted to us.

Sometimes you have to sit back and be thankful. Jess and I have been so thankful for our friends and family that have supported us in this time. Thank you so much.

A List of 50 Things I Cannot Do

2011-02-09T13:03:00.000-08:00

1. Start a fire by rubbing two sticks together.

2. Clean a deer.

3. Slam dunk a regulation hoop.

4. Skate, blade, or ski.

5. Hotwire a car.

6. Change my own oil.

7. Do a backflip.

8. Climb a sheer rock wall.

9. Impersonate a celebrity.

10. Grow a uni-brow.

11. Make beef stew.

12. Ride a motorcycle.

13. Create an igloo.

14. Crack a whip.

15. Hack a website.

16. Build a tree-house.

17. Speak another language.

18. Swim the English Channel.

19. Create an origami swan.

20. Rebuild an engine.

21. Make lasagna.

22. Avoid tearing up while watching Up, The Iron Giant, or The Return of the King.

23. Repair a lawnmower.

24. Draw a straight line.

25. Take a gunshot without flinching.

26. Talk my way into a villain's lair.

27. Eat a 96oz steak.
28. Bring my car into a controlled spin.

29. Hang-glide.

30. Jump across rooftops.

31. Read someone's bluff in poker.

32. Name a player on the Yankees.

33. Sing in a public setting.

34. Win a drinking contest.

35. Use a pogo-stick.

36. Train a falcon.

37. Tell you who won the World Cup.

38. List the lyrics to "It's the end of the world as we know it."

39. Drink Guinness.

40. Build a Millennium Falcon.

41. Ride a unicycle.

42. Ride a horse.

43. Throw a knife.

44. Fly-fish.

45. Outrun a bear.

46. Wrestle a gorilla.

47. Grow a ZZtop-style Beard.

48. Play a bass guitar.

49. Build a computer from scratch.

50. Give a speech to inspire America to fight off the alien invaders.

Godzilla Threshold

2011-02-06T13:03:00.000-08:00

Some situations reach a point that any solution, no matter how devastating, is worth it. This is the Godzilla Threshold.

You reach a point where it becomes worth it to summon Godzilla, the "patron saint of collateral damage."

It's that point where nothing could be worse than not solving the problem, so any and all solutions are on the table.

I don't know why I find this so cool, but I do. It nurtures my inner geek.

What situations in your own life reached a Godzilla Threshold?

Superbowl Analysis

2011-02-04T01:23:00.000-08:00

First, I felt like I should share this video of the Marshawn Lynch Run:

So I'm at 3-7 throughout the playoffs - not a great batting average. I'll end at either 27% or 36% - by far my worst ever postseason picks percentage.

My season average is 58%, no matter where my Superbowl pick ends up. That's not a bad average, I don't think. Average, anyway (and 4% better than Dave).

And the Superbowl Pick...

We have Pittsburgh and Green Bay, with Green Bay being favored by 2.5.

Pittsburgh is more balanced; Green Bay is more explosive.

Here's the truth... When it comes to the Superbowl, you never know. The game can go anyway, and it's usually not the way you want it to go.

There's something about having to focus on just one game that really trips your brain up. When I was making regular season picks, it was much easier - because there are so many you can't really put detailed analysis into it.

So, onto my Superbowl picks. That's right, I said picks.

Bird Bowl Pick: Did you know that the Packers are named after their first sponsor - a moving company? So it's the equivalent of those shady furniture movers or a steel worker - I'll take the steel worker.

Spread Pick: If there's one team that would keep it close, it's Pittsburgh. If there's one team that would blow it wide open, it's Green Bay. I'm going to take Green Bay, I guess.

Head Pick: Green Bay in a dome. That's all I need.

Heart Pick: Green Bay Packers. I hope they win.

3/4 picks go to the Packers. So there ya go.

Sabbath Group

2011-02-03T13:52:00.001-08:00

A couple of days ago I asked you to imagine Church as it could be. It seems only fitting then that I tell you a bit about how Church is, right now, for me.

Church, in my experience and history, has always had two components; a heart and a backbone. I went to church for the heart, and the backbone helped support that. Let me explain.

When I first started going to church (First Baptist of Spring Lake), the church itself was the backbone. Sunday services, prayer meeting, etc. These supported what truly drew me to Church -Youth Group, which was the heart of it for me. I was drawn by the community and the relationships that Youth Group offered.

College had the backbone of Bible College and the heart of Monday Midnight Prayer. Post-College had Seacoast Church and EveryTuesday, but more importantly, "Family Dinner," a Sunday night prayer gathering. It was when I moved back to Michigan that things started to change. I bounced from community to community, not having a strong backbone. I did have "Friday Nights at the Muffin Place," which was a great way to grow in relationships.

And now I've moved to Seattle and have not found a typical "church" to partake with and of. I don't have the backbone that was so familiar and helpful as I was growing up. But recently, I've found the heart of a community that truly draws me - Sabbath Group.

We meet weekly in each others homes and have a meal and drink wine. We take turns sharing how our lives are going and what God is doing. We share hardships and successes, laugh and cry, drink and dream. Tomorrow, we'll get together and make homemade pizza's and watch the Superbowl.

So that's the place I'm in with Church. My wife and I have talked recently about finding the space and place to reintroduce some sort of backbone to our lives, but I feel no pressure. It's been an interesting journey to here; but it's helped me realize what's important and what's not; what I will fight for and what I will take a pass on; what's worth the trouble and what's not.

Life: Paused

2011-02-01T15:06:00.000-08:00

There is something so frustrating about the pause.

That moment where you have to stop where you are and pick it up again later. It drives me crazy when I have to pause a movie and stop in the middle of some cool action scene (or more accurately, when my wife pauses the movie).

What's worse is when you pause the movie and get so engrossed in something else, that you forget about your movie until a few hours later. My DVD player will shut off about twenty minutes after you pause it, if you don't do anything. Then you have to try to restart, figure out where you were, and hope the beginning of the movie remains fresh.

Life pauses too. And my life has been in a (meta)pause, and a (mini?) pause.

Last week, my car blew a head gasket. The repair will cost between two and three grand - money I just don't have. It's been so frustrating, because I've been thinking about all the things I wanted to do this year - look at my New Years Resolutions, for jeepers sake! And without a car, a lot of those seem unreachable or unattainable. I felt like I was growing and in a good place, and all of a sudden it was three steps backwards.

Isn't there a cruel irony in finally paying for YMCA membership and using it to get in shape and then your car breaks and you can't get there?

So my life is in a (mini)pause.

But my life is also in a (meta)pause.

My life had forward momentum until I got married. Now I'm married, but there isn't a momentum in my life, because I'm in the "supporting spouse" role right now. I'm not complaining - I love my wife, I love being married, and I love being in Seattle. It just seems strange that I haven't taken an active role at a church in two years. I haven't applied for a pastorate type position in about a year and a half.

And that's not necessarily bad. I think I burned myself out in those roles for a long time. Perhaps instead of using the word pause, I should think of this time in my life as a breather?

Breather: A moment of anticipation where you stand on the edge of a slippery dock and wait to jump into the icy water.

When I think in those terms, it's helpful. Pause, for me, is so negative, but breather is beautiful and full of hope. So currently in my life, I'm in a (meta)breather and a (mini)breather.

I don't know. Hopefully these thoughts are helpful - what do you think?

Postscript: I struggled to not make (meno)pause jokes the entire time I was writing this.

Tune in later for: The church experience I'm in currently versus Imagine Church

Imagine Church

2011-01-27T12:19:00.000-08:00

I used to think about starting a church. Or "planting" a church, depending on if I could convince someone to give me money. It's never went beyond the conceptual phase; my friend Geoff and I would discuss the things that made us most excited but never the challenges or steps we would need to take to get there.

In all of my/our conceptualizing, there was one idea that always stuck with me, something that I reflected on after Monday's post linking immaturity and creativity. It was simple - the idea of imagination.

It's even a cool tagline - Imagine Church. It's a name, but it's also a statement. It's a verb.

Imagine church... where we replace barriers with open arms.

Imagine church... where we swap exclusivity for diversity.

Imagine church... where people are more important than tradition.

Imagine church... where creativity is our worship of God.

It's that idea of emphasizing creativity and imagination over stodgy traditionalism and sentimentality that appeals to me. The idea first started percolating in my head when I read a book by Rick Bundschuh - Don't Rock the Boat, Capsize it. It's mostly a discussion of how Rick does church (in Kauai Hawaii).

The key thing I remember from the book is Rick's quest to make change a tradition of the church. After all, change is inevitable. Resistance is futile, so to speak. And if we can't resist something, shouldn't we embrace it and use it for the glory of God? Routinely, Rick's church reorganizes everything from the structure of the church service, the time of the church service, even the way the church sanctuary is designed, decorated, or oriented.

I don't want to work for or in or with a church that's is rigid and inflexible. The church I imagine is one that is willing and able to move and change - to become all things to all people. What do you imagine in a church?

(There appears to be two Imagine Church's already - one in San Bernardino CA and one in Westfield IN)

Creativity and Immaturity

2011-01-24T11:12:00.000-08:00

I wonder if there is a link between creativity and immaturity. I started pondering this idea over the weekend, as my wife and I watched The Social Network. I was listening to some of the commentaries, and one thing that stuck with me was when Jesse Eisenberg, who plays Mark Zuckerberg in the movie, commented that Mark was only 19 when he made some of these poor decisions. This is a good time to point out that the movie is certainly a dramatized version of events, but the point still holds.

Maturity is sometimes thought of as when you "put your childish dreams aside" or when you start living in reality - I am a full grown man, I need to stop playing video games and get a real job. It's that realization that you need to live in the real world that sometimes is used to define maturity.

But creativity happens outside of the real world. When we imagine something, we are by definition not looking at what is. And that, by our definition, is no longer a mature view.

It makes sense to me. When I look at places that are stark and unimaginative, they seemed to be filled with so called "mature" or grounded people. Look at a church that is lifeless and still; it seems to be full of good people, but they are grounded in what is. Same thing happens in the business world - the people without imagination run things, but they can never create anything better than what is.

Certainly sometimes the issue is that creativity comes with too much immaturity - as we see in The Social Network. You have to balance the immaturity with responsibility. But we also may need to embrace our immaturity to find our imagination.

NFL Conference Championship Picks

2011-01-20T09:51:00.001-08:00

Enough lovey dovey wisdom. Let's get back to football and a sad memorial..

To the 2011 playoff season... The first season since I started writing my predictions down that I will end with a losing record. Currently, I'm sitting at 2-6, with 3 games left. 2-6 against the spread as well. All that's left is to drag Dave down with me (he's sitting at 4-4).

Before we move onto the picks, let's review from October - my NFL Bias Rankings. Of the teams we have left, we have #4, the Green Bay Packers. That means they are my fourth favorite professional football team. Then we have numbers 30-32 - Pittsburgh, New York Jets, and Chicago respectively. Actually, disrespectively.

So the best case scenario is clearly a Green Bay / Pittsburgh matchup, which would average a 17 on the bias rankings. That's what I have to hope for - a matchup that averages the appeal of the Washington Redskins, who are the highest rated team in the bottom half of teams I don't like.

Of course, because God hates my sports picks, I'll be looking at a Chicago/Jets (average 31.5) superbowl, and have to decide whether I want to gouge my eyes out with a rusty fork dipped in tabasco sauce or allow my manhood to be repeatedly crushed with a hammer. Oh, and both the fork and hammer have Ebola.

Seriously, if one of those two teams wins, it might be a devastating blow to my sports appreciation. Following on Pittsburgh / Chicago Stanley Cup victories and the dismal Rich Rod experience, I might have to give up on sports altogether.

On to the picks.

Green Bay Packers at Chicago Bears (Pack by 4)

Here's the truth of the issue. I've picked against the Packers twice so far. They are tied with the Jets as the possible kryptonite team for me.

But this week, I'm taking the Packers. Aaron Rodgers? Can't bet against him in the playoffs. And Chicago is still one of the luckiest teams to ever make it to a conference championship - they beat two good teams all year (New York Jets and Philadelphia, who may or may not qualify for "good" status). They had at least one bogus win - week 1 against Detroit. And they played against approximately 24 backup quarterbacks.

So I shall take Green Bay to cover the spread. Heaven help me. Green Bay 27, Chicago 14.

New York Jets at Pittsburgh Steelers (Pitt by 4)

In the last two years, I have picked the New York Jets games in the playoffs at 1-4. I have never picked the Jets to win a game.

So dang it all, I'll pick them to win this game. And be happy either way. New York 24, Pittsburgh 20. Well, as happy as I can be with a Pittsburgh win.

Enjoy the weekend, and get those tabasco forks out!

Power of Vulnerability Discussion

2011-01-19T10:57:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I hosted a video on my blog. Not entirely sure why it didn't work right - the video is strangely cut off on one side. You can see the full (unmessed up) video here. You can also read the transcript here.

I think one of the interesting things that she talked about was the idea of vulnerability, and how we often try to numb the pain of vulnerability. The danger with that is that we can’t selectively numb – when we numb pain and vulnerability, we also numb joy and gratitude and happiness.

It’s something interesting to reflect on in regards to my life, and definitely interesting to think about with where I’m at currently. In the past, I’ve tried to ignore and numb the feelings of pain and hurt. I think back to my relationships with my parents and I have tried to just simply ignore the ways they did hurt me, and numbed the memories away. In doing that, I simply disconnected from my family. I don’t recall having a single deep conversation with my family after I reached high school.

So perhaps that should be my challenge today – to start entering into those relationships and having conversations, even where it feels dangerous. What about you?

Elements of Story

2011-01-18T14:01:00.000-08:00

I recently told 2 stories here on the blog - one about our temporary dog and one about my first kiss. I was searching for something in the stories that would allow me to use them as more stories. In reflecting on the telling of the story, I started reflecting on the elements of storytelling (a flashback to first grade!)

All good stories have these elements. I want to now examine the stories I told in light of these elements, and see where the strongest elements of each story lay.

1. Setting - where and when is the story happening?

Neither of the stories have particularly strong settings. "Chopper" takes place in Charleston, two or three years ago. The dominant location is our house, and I don't do a particularly strong job of laying out the geography of the house. "First Kiss" for the most part happens in a driveway.

In telling stories, I think this is sometimes my weakest element. I don't do well with laying out a scene in a particularly interesting or engaging way. This is an element I need to work on, clearly.

2. Plot - what is happening in the story?

Plot can be a hammer if you're not careful. I've written in the past to not let plot be the primary driver in any story, fictional or nonfictional. Plot should happen as a result of characterization. Looking at my two stories, the plot is more natural in the "First Kiss" story. There is a definite order to what is happening, but the reason it's happening in that order is because of the characters involved. The plot involved with "Chopper" is more by-the-numbers - x happened, then y, then z.

3. Characterization - who is the story happening to?

The primary drive behind any good story is solid characters. One of the reasons I remember Stephen King novels is because he creates wonderfully vivid and engaging characters. This is an element of story that occurs (for me) most unnaturally. I have to struggle to imbue the characters on paper (or on-screen) with the character that they have; it's a challenge to not end up in cliche. In writing Ashram, I worked the hardest at bringing out the essence of each team member. Writing the plot and conflict was easy - but making the characters true to the real life persona's was most difficult area. One of the notes I remember getting from Dave after he read the manuscript was "Um, could Keith and I not be idiots the entire way through?"

In the two stories, the characters are mostly flat. You don't get a sense of Steve through his actions in "Chopper" - probably the most developed character is Chopper himself. In "First Kiss," you can see some of my essence coming through in what I wrote (pretty easy to write for yourself!) but you can't really see Jess. This is an area that I need to remember to work on.

4. Conflict - why do the characters care about the plot?

Ultimately, why are the characters invested? Conflict should arise naturally as a result of your characterization. I reflect on Lost, season two, and one thing that seemed so clear going in was how epic of a showdown Mr. Eko and Locke were going to have. The reason you could feel that coming was that both had very strong characterizations, and those characterizations were in conflict. For them to be true to their characters, they needed to have conflict.

In "Chopper," the conflict is readily apparent - our house was being destroyed by a demon-dog. In "First Kiss," there are two conflicts occuring, but only one illustrated. The first conflict is between Jess and I specifically, about the status of our relationship. The second conflict, the one I didn't (and should have) addressed is the conflict inside of me - how should I respond?

Those are the elements of story, as I recall them. Thoughts?

Watch This: TED

2011-01-18T10:34:00.000-08:00

A great talk that we listened to at Sabbath Group recently, about vulnerability. Give it a listen!

NFL: 2011 Divisional Round

2011-01-14T09:41:00.000-08:00

So I went 0-4 in wildcard picking. I'm not prepared to panic yet - I did start 0-4 last year as well, and ended up with a winning record (6-5). I did go 1-3 against the spread.

The wildcard weekend was two coinflip games (GB/PHI and NY/IND) and two classic "85%" games. The 85% games are when 85% of the public picks the same team to win - in this case New Orleans and Baltimore. Can't say anything about the coinflip games; I just plain got those wrong (Thanks Jim Caldwell for that timeout! Thanks Vick for that interception! Jeez). But I did smell something funny in those 85% games and just picked the wrong one.

That's my excuse anyway. Let's look at the divisional round:

Ravens at Steelers (Pitt by 3)

Everyone's talking about how this game will end with one team winning by three points exactly. I don't think so. Just a hunch, but I'm thinking Pittsburgh by 6. I didn't feel too good about the Ravens in that KC game - KC just imploded. Flacco started to get rattled, which he has a tendency to do. The X-Factor, in my mind, is Ed Reed. Will he be distracted by his missing brother, or will it become one of those crazy games we hear about years later (like the game Favre played after his dad died?).

I'm thinking Pittsburgh 20, Baltimore 14.

Jets at Patriots (Patriots by 8.5)

The Patriots totally have that icy silence right now. They're totally just letting Rex Ryan (and Cromartie, etc) stick their foots (heh) in their mouths. Here's one thing I know: you can beat Tom Brady in close games. But you can't play a close game if Brady stone cold hates you.

Patriots 35, Jets 10.

Packers at Atlanta (Atlanta by 2)

An insulting line to Atlanta. Green Bay didn't play a magnificent game last week, but it was still pretty high profile, because it was against Michael Vick. I'm sticking with Atlanta - home team advantage.

Atlanta 23, Packers 17.

Seahawks at Chicago (Chicago by 10)

Too many weird things about this game. Let's look:

Seattle and the "nobody believed in us" factor.
Chicago hasn't scored a touchdown since December 26th.
Chicago is undoubtedly the luckiest number 2 seed ever.
Seattle knows they can beat Chicago at Chicago.
Chicago wants a bit of revenge.
Jay Cutler has never played in a playoff game, college or pro.
Two weeks in a row Seattle being double digit underdogs plays into Pete Carroll's coaching style.
Chicago was perhaps the one team that least needed a bye to rest.
Seattle has become the single greatest crappy "What If" team in recent history. Think of all the questions you can ask - could Seattle be 10 point underdogs throughout the rest of the playoffs? What if they won everything despite the opposing teams being favored by a total of 45 points? What if it's Seattle vs New England (Carroll homecoming)? Seattle vs Pittsburgh (Refpocalypse)? What if...?
I dreamt that Chicago would win by two points.

So bottom line, I have no idea. I do believe that either this game or the NE/NY game will be close, so I'm sticking with this one to be the close game. And who am I to argue with dreams? I'll take Chicago.

Chicago 14, Seattle 12. That seems like the most likely two point victory, right? Unless we're talking Chicago 30, Seattle 28. Either way.

Devotions

2011-01-13T07:46:00.000-08:00

I'm leading devotions today for the broadcasting team - a team that I don't really know. I've been experimenting over the last few days with stories, trying to see what is worth talking about... Well, I'm out of time to experiment, so I have what I'm going with. I'm going to share it with you, my blog readers, first - as an exclusive to you, and also as final practice of what I'm going to say. So... Onwards? Upwards. I don't know.

(I intend to open with the story of my mom's death)

There's a psychological model called the 5 Stages of Grief. Most people are familiar with it, but just in case you aren't, here are the 5 stages:

Denial - This can't be happening.
Anger - I hate that this is happening.
Bargaining - I will do anything to prevent this.
Depression - This is inevitable and crushing.
Acceptance - It's going to be okay.

Most psychologists accept that these are varying and indeterminate stages. Not everyone goes through in a strict order of 1 - 5. Some people skip around. Some people move through the stages cyclically. Psychologists also don't believe that there is a certain time frame for each stage. People spend different amounts at each stage, and how long they are in any one stage is determined solely by them.

I'm starting to believe that this model is not just helpful for grief, or at least the narrow definition of grief that it's usually applied with. Perhaps a more appropriate title would be the 5 stages of change? After all, grief is fundamentally a change in the world around us, right? We grieve because the change is irreversible and hurts us specifically.

Here's an recent example from my own life of a change I grieved, and how I worked through the stages:

At work, we recently changed the software that we use for scheduling. This turned out to be much more frustrating than we originally envisioned - partially because we at the Nursing Center did not envision or desire a change of software. We went through (in sequential order, actually) the 5 stages of change/grief:

We spent a lot of time just ignoring the request to switch to a new and confusing system. Since there was no real urgency to the request to switch, and no one shut down our old method, we just continued to use it and hoped noone would notice us.
When eventually we were noticed, we were told to switch to the new system. This made us rather angry - we didn't ask for a new system, and no one asked us for our input about the system. As regular users, this didn't really sit right with us.
After a bit, we cooled down and started thinking about how we could use (or not use) the system. We spent about a month emailing with people in charge of the switchover, trying to 'negotiate' how much we would be forced to use. What if we just switched over two of our half dozen calendars? What if we just made a note on the new software to call us to use the old software? What if...
Most of our what if's fell to the ground, and we moved into the new system, still upset about the ordeal. The next two months I spent comparing the new system to the old system; thinking of how great and easy the old way was, and how much I wished we could go back. All I could see of the new system was the flaws and the ways it came short of our old software.
Only recently have I started to see the ways in which the new software is useful, and stopped wishing to go back to the old software. I don't have a specific reason why - time heals all, I guess. Or perhaps it just from me playing around with the old software again and getting frustrated by it's limitations. Either way, I'm now at the acceptance portion of using the software.

So the 5 stages of grief can be used practically in our work place lives. It helps us to recognize areas of change where we're struggling, areas that we're grieving a loss (or change) in our lives.

I also believe that the 5 stages of grief is biblical, with a twist. I see it in the structure of the most grief-stricken book in the Bible - the book of Lamentations.

Lamentations is in the Old Testament, a small book nestled between Jeremiah and Ezekiel. It's only five chapters long, and the only book in the Bible consisting solely of Laments - sad songs. It was written about the fall of Jerusalem in 586BC. It's also a poetic book - the first 4 chapters are acrostics, each line starting with the next letter of the Hebrew alphabet.

And, interestingly, it's structure almost exactly fits the 5 stages of grief. Chapter by chapter even.

Chapter 1 is outlined in my study bible as "Jerusalem's Misery and Desolation." Here are a few key phrases:

how deserted lies the city, once so full of people (v1)
she who was a queen among the provinces (v1)
all the splendor has departed her(v6)
Jerusalem remembers all the treasures that were hers (v7)

The author seems focussed on what Jerusalem was, painting a comparison of what it is now. In some senses, the author is living in the past, living in denial. He (or she) can't avoid praising the Jerusalem that was, as if the act of praise will bring Jerusalem back.

Chapter 2 is called "The Lords anger against his People." That seems pretty self explanatory, but just in case it's not clear that this is the Lord's wrath, 5 of the first 6 verses all make explicit reference to wrath or anger. The first 3rd of the chapter is a description of the Lord's anger, and the second 2/3rds are the results.

Case in point - the first verse in the chapter: "How the Lord has covered the daughter of Zion with the cloud of his anger; he has hurled down the splendor of Israel from heaven to earth; he has not remembered his footstool in the day of his anger."

Chapter 3 is the "Basis for Consolation." The author makes a plea for the Lord to save him - verses 49-50 are a classic "if I do this, Lord will you do that?" prayer, the sort we make all the time. "Please let me be on time and I will read my bible every day for the rest of my life!" "Please let this be okay, and I will serve you." When I was in high school, I swore to God that if he provided me with a date to my freshman homecoming dance, I would read 3 chapters of the Bible every day. I forgot, and then spend the day before the dance frantically trying to read a month's worth of 3 chapters a day (90 chapters). That didn't really work so well, and I went single (that year).

Verses 49-50: "My eyes will flow unceasingly without relief, until the Lord looks down from heaven and sees."

Chapter 4 is the depression chapter... which starts out with this verse: "How the gold has lost its luster; the fine gold become dull!"

That seems pretty depressing.

And it all culminates at the end of Chapter 5 with this verse (19): "You, O Lord, reign forever. Your throne endures from generation to generation."

So that's the book of Lamentations in five minutes. Or less. Maybe more. I'm pretty bad at clocking myself. I think the most interesting parallel to the 5 stages of grief is the final stage - acceptance. Acceptance doesn't come from a false sense of "it will be okay," or a denial of what happened. What happened hurt, and that still matters.

Acceptance comes from the idea that despite how much it hurts, God is still good. Praising Him is still worthy. When we can come back around to praising God, even in the midst of pain and hurt, is when we can know we are healing (not healed) and that we are coming to terms with our grief; that we are learning acceptance.

Learning to Grieve

2011-01-10T12:38:00.000-08:00

My mom died January 10th 2008, three years ago today.

It's one of those things you don't really get over; something you can't ever quite put behind you.

There are moments of pure grief involved. I think of the last three years of my life - in many ways the best three years of my life, and think about how my mom never got to see those. She never got to hear me talk about my final months in Charleston; she never watched me pursue Jess; she never got to watch my wedding; she never really had a chance to see me grow up and be a man (in my humble opinion, of course).

But then there are moments of pure anger as well. Because it was her decisions that ultimately prevented her from seeing any of those moments. My mom was an alcoholic, and when she was brought to the hospital with a sudden onset of jaundice, it was discovered that she had lost her liver to cirrhosis. Worse - she had known that there was something wrong for sometime and had kept it hidden from everyone else. The lack of medical follow-through meant that when she was finally forced to go to the hospital, she had also lost the function of her kidneys.

Even at this point, she didn't want to stop drinking.

So it's a strange thing to look back and remember. Because I may have moments of grief, but sometimes they flow into anger, and vice versa.

The one thing I've noticed about losing my mom is that stories about her mean so much more now. At Christmas, I shared a story about my favorite Christmas memory at an office party, and I was surprised to find that the point of the story was just the look on my mom's face for one Christmas. It's a story that I probably would never have remember or thought twice of if my mom was still here.

I've wanted to write down my experiences of that two week period three years ago for some time. It's an amazing story the more I look back on it - not amazing in a good way, mind you. I lived in Charleston; went on vacation to Michigan; and came back motherless two weeks later. It happened that quick.

I've written some of those experiences down, but not all of them. I remember struggling to pretend to be strong for my family and for my dad; I remember anger at some of the ways family members responded; I remember the fumbling terror the morning where my dad called into the bedroom I was sleeping in that we needed to go to the Hospice center right there and I remember the numbing sensation that covered my entire self the moment I realized that it could only mean one thing.

But it's not all terrible memories. I also remember being overwhelmed with the grace and kindness of my friends. I remember crying on the phone with several of my friends, and friends crying on the phone with me. I remember the cavalry showing up and taking me out to dinner. I remember the morning she died driving to Cornerstone and just being with a friend who had no idea what had even happened and how that was exactly what I needed.

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote a few things about what I think this year is going to be about - a few of my resolutions. I think this is an important part of this year too, learning to face and confront this grief. I don't think it's a coincidence that I've recently developed a friendship with a man who lost his mom a few years ago. I don't think it's a coincidence that I'm wanting to write more and that this is one of the larger projects I've considered writing.

I'm not entirely sure where this is going, but I do know where it's been. I think even stepping out and writing this post could be a first step - a first step to healing; a first step to growth; a first step towards learning to grieve.

Fill in the ______: The First Kiss

2011-01-07T13:35:00.000-08:00

I'm supposed to lead a 30-45 minute devotional next week for a group of people I don't really know. I led a devotion for them last year, and told some funny stories about India (straight out of Ashram) and then connected them. I'd like to do something this year, but I don't want to talk about India again.

I have three funny stories that don't come from India. I'm going to tell them on the blog over the next couple of days, and I'd like you to tell me:

What elements interested you?
What elements bored you?
What meaning do you see behind the story?
Can you draw any lessons / parallels from the story?
Any advice on telling the story?

Today's story is "The First Kiss."

I moved across the country for a girl once. Not the long ways across, but from the south side to the north side anyway. This girls name was Jess, and I had fallen hard for her in college. After college, I moved away to pursue an internship at a church. We kept in contact throughout the years, and once my mom died, we began to tentatively explore the idea of being in a real relationship together.

I immediately packed everything I owned and moved back to Michigan. Well, not immediately, but that was how it felt. I left a great house full of great friends and a good job. With very little cash (and right after Hurricane Ike drove gas prices to 5 dollars a gallon) and no firm place to live, I drove north.

All of the housing and job stuff worked out (as it always does if you're patient), and I started seeing Jess on a regular basis. Well, I saw her once. We started dating on a Tuesday, and she invited me over to meet her parents on a Sunday.

We ate dinner with her parents and played some card games. Afterwards, I walked Jess to her car.

"I think we should break up."

I was stunned. We had been dating 5 days and I was pretty sure I hadn't screwed anything up yet.

Jess started explaining, without really looking at me, how she had talked to her sister and didn't feel like we were meant for each other. She said she wasn't sure that she wanted to date me, and wasn't sure if I was her Prince Charming.

She said I wasn't the man she fell asleep dreaming about.

After this verbal explosion, she finally looked at me and said "I would really appreciate it if you said something now."

I stood outside her parents house, in front of Jess's car, and had no idea what the correct response was. At this point, I didn't know if there was a correct response. I cared about Jess more than I cared to admit; and the thought of having moved across the country for this was a more foreign idea than anything I encountered in India. I could feel tears welling up - but I wasn't sure if they were tears of sadness and grief or tears of anger and rage.

"Please say anything," Jess begged.

And so I did.

"Screw it."

And then I kissed her.

WIldcard Picks: 2011

2011-01-06T10:29:00.000-08:00

Here are my picks from last year, where I went 0-4 first round...

And here are the rules (copied and compilated from that post) that I pick by:

1. Momentum Matters.
2. One team is overhyped, one team is underhyped.
3. When in doubt, take the home team. But pick at least one road team.
4. ~~Destiny Exists.~~

5. One team is kryptonite.

I gave up number 4 after last year's much feared Packers/Vikings Favrpocalypse never happened. I'm adding number 5 for me personally - there is consistently one team I pick incorrectly. The most blatant example? The 2007 Giants, who I picked to lose 4 times. So with those rules in mind, let's go to the picks.

New York Jets at Indianapolis Colts

Line: Indianapolis by 2.5

Jets have the ability to be my kryptonite team (they filled that role last year...), but I'm picking against them. They basically backed into the playoffs, losing 3 of their last 5 (and dropping from a potential 1 seed to the 6 seed). Indy's won 4 straight, so all the momentum is on their side. Also, Indy is home. Easy enough.

And the final nail in the coffin? Rex Ryan running his mouth. If there's one player you don't want to give reasons to psych up for a game in the NFL, it's Tom Brady. But if there's two players, Peyton Manning. So I think Indy wins this one. And I'll take them to cover the spread.

Final Score: Indianapolis 24, New York 13.

Baltimore Ravens at Kansas City Chiefs

Line: Baltimore by 3

Unsure. Kansas City might be underhyped, and Baltimore might be overhyped. Kansas City did lose their final game, killing any momentum (and home turf psychological edge). But Baltimore isn't setup to win games big; and a close game benefits the Chiefs running game.

And I do have to take an upset this round, so I'm going to take the Chiefs. Probably folly, but hey, these are my picks. Dang, that sounds so stupid. But I'm doing it. So I'll take the chiefs to win (which means they would by default cover).

It also plays into another theory - go against the grain. If most everyone agrees on something, you can try to get away with it. So I'll stick with it.

Final Score: Kansas City 20, Baltimore 17

New Orleans Saints at Seattle Seahawks

Line: New Orleans by 11

I have my upset special in Kansas City, and I have my road team special in New Orleans. Not often in the playoffs do those come in separate games.

Here's what it comes down to for me: in a game that New Orleans was only half heartedly in, they still gave Tampa a game last week. In a game that Seattle was fully in, they only beat St Louis on the incompetence of the wide receivers of STL. So when New Orleans comes out to play this week, there's no hope for Seattle. New Orleans covers.

Final Score: New Orleans 34, Seattle 9.

Green Bay Packers at Philadelphia Eagles

Line: Philadelphia by 2.5

This is a hard pick because there are two Green Bay Packers teams. There's the team that scores single digit points, and the team that scores 30 points. Team A (Single Digits) has no chance at Philly. Team B (30 points) has a 50/50 shot to outscore Philadelphia. So if we said each team has an equal chance of showing up, Green Bay has a 25% chance to win. I think. Math is hard!

I also think that Green Bay tends to lose to good teams. Their signature wins were over New York Giants (a team in collapse), Chicago (a team with nothing to play for), and the Jets (the game where Sanchez looked remarkably like I think he looks all the time). They couldn't hang with New England or Atlanta, both teams I think would (or will) struggle to handle Vick. So I'll take the Eagles. I'll hedge a bit though and take Green Bay to cover.

Stay tuned next week for the Divisional Round, or whatever the heck it's called.

Fill in the ______: Chopper

2011-01-05T08:20:00.000-08:00

I have three funny stories that don't come from India. I'm going to tell them on the blog over the next couple of days, and I'd like you to tell me:

What elements interested you?
What elements bored you?
What meaning do you see behind the story?
Can you draw any lessons / parallels from the story?
Any advice on telling the story?

The first of the three stories is "Chopper."

I lived in Charleston, South Carolina, for about two years, in a house with three other guys. We were all bachelors, which was something about ourselves that we wished to change. Over the course of two years, we hatched many plots to change our bachelorness. We tried creating groups and inviting women - swing dancing, prayer, 80's movies. We hosted bonfires every weekend. We pretended to like "The Notebook." And when none of that worked, we decided to break out the big guns - we were going to get a dog.

Having always been partial to Golden Retrievers, I lobbied for one. It was only then that we realized that dogs are not cheap. A golden retriever could easily run several hundred dollars on the low end! Even getting a dog from the shelter requires about two hundred dollars to pay for vaccinations and spay/neuter. We were desperate yes, but we were also cheap.

And then Steve, my roommate, solved our problems. His coworker was getting married and wanted to get rid of his dog - and he was giving it to us for free! This probably should have been our first clue.

I went with Steve to pick up the dog. I was convinced it was just some sort of mutt, with the lineage of forty different breeds or whatever. I did not expect to show up and find a 120pound pit bull named Chopper.

Okay, so this dog is huge and looks scary. Chopper didn't act scary though. He was nice - he definitely cried when leaving his old owner, and made pathetic mewling sounds.

Once we got Chopper home however, he dropped the act.

I generally like dogs. In fact, I don't think I've ever been scared of a dog before I met Chopper. Playing with Chopper was not recommended. I always enjoyed playing tug of war with a dog, wrestling them for control over a rope or a bone or whatever.

If you made a move torwards Chopper's current toy of choice (bone, shoe, stuffed animal, foodstuffs he had broken into), he would growl. No, scratch that. The frigging T-Rex he kept in his throat would growl. It sounded out of this world terrifying.

We didn't want to leave him in the house when we went to work, because of his propensity to eat the things we cared about. So the first day we left him in the garage, figuring that there wasn't really anything in there he could eat or kill.

I came home from work that day and found Chopper sitting idly on the living room couch. This concerned me, because our couch is not located in our Garage. I went to the garage to see how Chopper could have escaped - perhaps he broke a window or something.

No. Chopper chewed through the inner garage door into the house. Chewed through the door.

Steve and I replaced the door, and vowed to get rid of Chopper before he killed us. We couldn't do anything that night, so the next morning we tied Chopper to a post outside and went to work. Steve tried to contact his coworker to see if he would take Chopper back; this was to no avail. I contacted a few shelters, but none would take an unspayed pit bull. And spaying him brought us back to the fact that we were cheap. Putting him down was also annoyingly expensive.

I returned home that night without any success, only to find Chopper once again on our couch. Being as our couch is also not in our backyard, I was immediately filled with a sense of dread.

Apparently, while we were gone, Chopper broke part of the porch we had attached him to and then chewed through our back door into the house. That's right - Chopper 2, Doors 0.

The next morning, Steve loaded Chopper into his car. I was never really clear what happened to Chopper - Steve said he released him into the wild to destroy trees and eat more wood. I don't think Steve was lying, but I know I lay awake for two weeks, concerned that Chopper was going to go all "Homeward Bound" and chew through our front door in the middle of the night.

NFL: Week 17 and Season Quick Review

2011-01-03T08:58:00.001-08:00

Here's where I ended up week 17:

I correctly predicted that the winning teams would be: Atlanta, Lions, Raiders, Patriots, Tampa, Chargers, Packers, Colts, 49ers, Seattle (lock).

I also incorrectly predicted that these teams would win: Browns (upset), Bills, Bengals (upset), Redskins, Jaguars, Eagles. I didn't really state who I was picking in Dallas/Philly, but I meant to take Philly so that's a mark against me...

So the week record was 10-6. Not shabby for week 17. I really thought I was doing much better than I thought; but maybe that's because the only teams I remembered picking were the Browns/Bengals upset teaser and the Bills. Don't take teams that start with B's.

So my overall 2010 regular season:

Picks: 150-104 (59%)

Lock: 12-5 (71%)

Upset: 5-12 (29%)

Not bad. I miscounted somewhere, as there are 256 regular season games, and I only have 254. The two games don't impact my final percentage (I'm still at 59% either way).

Upsets and Locks seem about right for those categories... I did tear up the Lock category, because I started out 1-5. Just goes to show you that the beginning of every season is a crapshoot.

Stay tuned later this week for my "Playoff Rules" column. It will inform you how I make my picks for the postseason, and tell you what those picks are.

Also random factoid I realized last night that I haven't heard anyone announce yet, which may make me a genius ready to be a sportscaster: The wildcard teams are a combined 7 games better than the 3/4 seeds. No wildcard team has a worse record than the team it is playing on the road against.

Theme of the Year

2011-01-02T06:40:00.000-08:00

I told you earlier that I think of New Years as a time to set your theme for the next year. It only seems smart then to think about the “theme” of last year, 2010 then.

In some ways, 2010 was a “down to earth” year. I spent time discovering that areas in which I told myself I would be skilled in were areas that I even struggled with competency. For example:

· Discovering that I’m not the perfect husband I always imagined I would be (I hurt my wife a lot more than I imagined, sometimes knowingly so)
· Learning that I still struggle at being a good employee (I still have trouble putting forth a 5/5 effort)
· Figuring out that I like being a writer much more than I like writing (I wrote very little of significance this year – my blog totals were skewed because of Lost recaps and NFL picks)
· Realizing that there are consequences to not being in a church (the few times I’ve lead devotions this year haven’t exactly been successful)
· Seeing that I like to talk about new experience more than do them (I sure like to just go to the same restaurants over and over)
· Heck, I didn’t even master Warhammer in the way I imagined (I took 5^th out of an 12 player tournament, which isn’t that impressive)

So these are expectations I had for 2010, and ways in which I came short. There are two components to any sort of ‘failure’ in goal setting –

1. The Goal – did I set my expectations too high?
2. The Performance – did I put forth my best effort?

I don’t think any of the goals I set were poor. They are all good things to aspire to. But I struggled with reaching them. I struggled with an image I set for myself that I didn’t reach.

In some ways, the struggles of 2010 have resulted in the most aimless year of my life. I couldn’t hit my goals, and thus the idea of setting goals beyond those seemed like madness. There were literal parts of my life this year where I was looking forward to something coming that was many weeks away. I couldn’t enjoy the moments I was in.

There was no build to my life last year. I was in a stalling flight pattern, waiting for orders to land. A great movie or book builds the tension; each chapter further tightens and changes the narrative to come.

So this year, here to the build. Here’s to seeing progress. Here’s to being in a different place a year from now. I set 35 resolutions the other day, and it is my hope that these resolutions will help me to be the person I thought I was. I hope to be here in a year saying that I met each and every one of those resolutions (and more), but more than that, I hope to say in a year that I’m a better:

· Husband

· Employee

· Writer

· Christian

· Lover of life

· Gamer

New Years Resolutions

2010-12-30T07:43:00.000-08:00

Somebody told me they don't believe in New Years Resolutions today, because they are concerned about being saddled with unnecessary guilt.

I believe a New Year is an opportunity to set the tone for the next year. It's not about saying "I will lose 10 pounds." It's about saying "This year, I want to be a better person." "This year, I'm going to focus on being holistic."

It's not about specific goals, but about ideas.

So in that vein, here are my specific goals for the year. I'm intentionally aiming high.

1. Lose 50 pounds.

2. Rewrite Ashram.

3. Complete a new book/project.

4. Take a ferry.

5. Go to an NFL game in person.

6. Beat my record of blog posts (109).

7. Complete my Space Marine and Lizardmen armies.

8. Win a tournament with one of those armies.

9. Get 3 Stars on all Angry Bird levels.

10. Surprise my wife with flowers at least 1/2 dozen times.

11. Visit the Space Needle.
12. Run a 5k.

13. Get less holes in my socks.

14. Pay off our PT Cruiser.

15. Be published on a website (not blog).

16. Triple my monthly blog visits.

17. Create a 5 year plan for my life.

18. Move into a new apartment/space.

19. Engage better at work.

20. Rewrite the instruction manual at work.

21. Create a home budget.

22. Get a desktop computer.

23. Win a fantasy football league.

24. Improve my NFL picks.

25. Listen to more sermons.

26. Get internet for my home.

27. Try a new restaurant every other month.

28. Create a list of movies/books that I own.

29. Create a list of movies/books that I want to own.

30. Create a list of movies/books that I've seen/read.

31. Own all the Animorphs books.

32. Create 2 short films.

33. Write 3 sermons/devotionals (that aren't for anything specific).

34. Get Ashram printed/published (self publish if necessary).

35. Own a sportcoat.

That's good enough. We'll start there!

NFL: Crystallizing the Playoff Picture

2010-12-29T07:28:00.000-08:00

So, the AFC is locked in, and we're just finagling positions. The NFC has two spots up for grabs, and some finagling of positions. I'm not going to write much here, because in a week what I write will be obsolete. Might as well wait and see.

I'm going to review my predictions from the preseason now. Hopefully this doesn't hurt too much.

Correctly predicted that Dallas and San Diego were overhyped (and Green Bay and New York Jets are close to being overhyped).

Correctly predicted that Arizona would drop a ton, but also incorrectly theorized Pittsburgh would.

None of my surprise playoff teams made it in (Carolina, Houston, Cleveland).

Dead right about Seattle / Denver. Nothing new in their fronts.

Was wrong about worst team. Tampa turned out to be a good crappy team and Buffalo showed some spunk.

Ryan Matthews was a bust in San Diego. Glad I didn't draft him. Suh was a marvel though.

I did predict Detroit would challenge third place in the division.

My quarterback analysis wasn't bad. Flacco probably didn't belong in the top 6.

Cleveland wasn't bad down the stretch, but didn't come close to 9-7.

I picked 6/12 correct playoff teams. That's really not that good.

Let's just move on to some slightly better picks.

Week 16 in Review:

Correct Picks: Steelers, Patriots, Bears, Ravens, Rams, Colts, Packers, Buccaneers, Saints

Incorrect Picks: Cowboys, Titans (upset), Dolphins, Jaguars, Chargers (lock), Texans, Eagles

Week: 9-7

Overall: 140-98

Lock: 11-5

Upset: 5-10

Week 17 Picks:

Panthers at Falcons: A strange must-win game for the Falcons, and not a must-lose game for Carolina. I'd like to think Carolina would rise up and try to have a say in the division, but they just don't have the talent to compete with Atlanta. So Atlanta wins.

Steelers at Browns: Not a gimme game for the Steelers. The Browns have been playing to the level of their opponents - crappy against crappy teams, good against good teams. I'll take Cleveland as an upset.

Viking at Lions: I wasn't going to pick the Lions this week, but the Vikings play the weird Tuesday game, so they'll be done. I'll take the Lions. Although, I don't like the thought of Brett Favre having his final game against Detroit.

Raiders at Chiefs: As the Chiefs, I may actually want to lose this game and get the 4th seed. Because in round 2, I'd much rather play New England than Pittsburgh (if I'm a running team anyway). I think Oakland wins because Kansas City isn't worried.

Dolphins at Patriots: Patriots do play hard in these games, and the Dolphins are really not a good team. I think the Patriots will win, because Miami can't come back when Tom Brady buries them by 30 points in the first quarter.

Buccaneers at Saints: Probably a meaningless game for New Orleans, but a must-win for Tampa. So I'll take Tampa. (Although can you imagine the craziness if New Orleans somehow snuck into the #1 seed? That would be a blindside for the ages.)

Bills at Jets: The Bills, as they won't let Mark Sanchez get within ten feet (heh) of the field.

Bengals at Ravens: Baltimore has the potential to win their division, but they did play their worst game of the season against Cincinnati. Unfortunately, passionate revenge and Joe Flacco don't really go in the same sentence. So, in a stunning move, I'm taking the Bengals as a second Upset (mostly because for some reason I've only picked 15 upsets to this point).

Chargers at Broncos: Who cares! Chargers will beat up on Tebow to take out their frustrations.

Bears at Packers: Green Bay is sort of maddeningly inconsistent. Have they posted two or three good games in a row? Chicago is at least consistent (they win games but look like they should lose). I guess I'll take Green Bay.

Titans at Colts: Don't bet against the Colts, at least until the playoffs.

Cowboys at Eagles: Meaningless! Vick plays a quarter, and then Kevin Kolb picks apart the Cowboys secondary. I think this is a better game for Kolb to play in anyway, as Dallas does have a pretty bad defense.

Cardinals at 49ers: Uglyrama. Take the home team, don't watch.

Giants at Redskins: The Redskins are the Vikings of the second half of the season - a crappy team dominating headlines. I subscribe to the notion that the Giants have folded, so I will pick Rex Grossman. If I ever have to type that sentence again, you know there is a gun to my head.

Jaguars at Texans: I haven't heard, but if Jones-Drew is playing I'll take the Jaguars. Actually, I'll just take the Jaguars no matter what.

Rams at Seahawks: And it comes to this. The 7-8 Rams at the 6-9 Seahawks for supremacy of the NFC West and the right to be trounced by New Orleans. I think I'm going to take the Seahawks. Two reasons, neither having to do with football (because these teams don't really play football). Number one - After Seattle makes it as 7-9 team, there is bound to be an outcry to reseed the playoffs. Number two - I could potentially go to the New Orleans game and get drunk and make fun of Seattle fans. So Seattle is my Lock.

Predicted Seedings:

AFC (In Order): New England, Pittsburgh, Indianapolis, Kansas City, Baltimore, New York

NFC (In Order): Atlanta, Chicago, Philadelphia, Seattle, New Orleans, Green Bay

2010: Year in Review

2010-12-28T02:49:00.000-08:00

2010 was a good year. A decent start to a decade. Let's look back on it:

I'm anticipating 108 blog posts on the year. That's nearly double the year before (only 62 posts). That's not really that great, seeing as I didn't really accomplish much else in writing.

January: Slow month. I spent the month predicting the NFL playoffs (6-5 total) and also making Lost predictions.

February: Lost Season 6 starts.

March: I unsuccessfully start participating in 750words.com, and write some more Lost Reviews.
April: I have vacation, and it's my wife 1st Birthday since we've been married. Red Wings burn out in the second round.

May: The Lost Series Finale destroys my soul.
June: First time I was Best Man in a wedding. I also wrote a series on quantum physics that didn't go far.

July: Inception rocks my world. I create a short film for a film contest and then promptly forgot about it.

August: I start a few new writing ideas. I do my first guest post and my first blog giveaway. I also turn 24.

September: The NFL Starts, and I start making picks.

October: The immensely popular NFL Bias Rankings make their first appearance.

November: Second married Thanksgiving. I enjoy it even though the turkey doesn't come out as good as last year.

December: Christmas was a great time. I really enjoyed it. It was a good blend of intimate and public, small and large.

So that's the year in review. Later this week tune in for an NFL column and New Years Resolutions.

Coolest News I've Heard All Week

2010-12-27T15:52:00.001-08:00

Scholastic is going to relaunch Animorphs.

That's seriously cool, for my nerdy self. I used to own them all, and have recently decided to try to recollect them. The covers look pretty sweet:

Count me as interested.

Horror Movie Plots

2010-12-27T09:35:00.000-08:00

I've said in the past that many horror movies are cliched and uninspired. So check out this "horror movie" synopsis:

Two kids are dragged underwater in a remote third world country and killed, and no one manages to catch a glimpse. After the locals rise up to defend their children, no more attacks happen...

...for nine years. Several more attacks happen, and one villager manages to catch a confusing glimpse of the creature. To help fend off the attacks, the locals call for help, and a British biologist shows up to try to identify and defeat the creature. After ruling out all manner of possibilities for the creature (crocodiles, sharks, etc) the Biologist sees a creature that shouldn't be there - or at least shouldn't be that size.

The Biologist (our protagonist) decides to set a trap for the creature. Theorizing that the creature (s) has been feeding off the half burned corpse that the locals leave in riverside funeral pyres, he creates a fake funeral pyre, and actually manages to catch the creature.

The creature - which has grown to 5 times it's normal size because of the abundance of human flesh- is...

A giant, six foot long, 160 pound, catfish, of course. Oh, and the final shot? There's a whole community of giant man eating catfish (for the sequel).

That's a crappy movie. Why? Because it hits every cliche in the book. Biologist Expert? Check. Glimpse of the monster? Check. Small child eaten to raise sympathy? Check. Even the final trap sounds likes a cheap jaws ripoff. Also, doesn't a man-eating catfish sort of sound stupid?

Good thing then that it's not a movie. This whole story is true - including the entire community of killer catfish. It happened in Nepal, on the Kali river. (And It Could Happen To You!)

I've been on a river where they have these types of funeral pyres. The entire time I was worried about seeing a dead body. Turns out I should have been worried about being eaten by a giant catfish.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-25T08:45:00.000-08:00

"I Celebrate The Day"

by Relient K

And with this Christmas wish is missed
The point I could convey
If only I could find the words to say to let You know how much You've touched my life
Because here is where You're finding me, in the exact same place as New Year's eve
And from a lack of my persistency
We're less than half as close as I want to be

And the first time
That You opened Your eyes did You realize that You would be my Savior
And the first breath that left Your lips
Did You know that it would change this world forever

And so this Christmas I'll compare the things I felt in prior years
To what this midnight made so clear
That You have come to meet me here

To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me
In the hope that what You did
That you were born so I might live
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me

And I, I celebrate the day
That You were born to die
So I could one day pray for You to save my life

The Holidays

2010-12-24T08:08:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas (Eve)!

I hope you enjoy the holidays and spend time with the ones you love. I figured I'd share a few things...

My Favorite Memory: My mom once tried to convince me that I should open one of my Christmas presents early, because she was so excited to see me open it.

Random Christmas Fact: I had my first live Christmas tree last year.

My Favorite Christmas Gift I've Received: 24 Christmas's so far. I think my favorite gift was still when I was a kid (first or second grade I think). I received the Jurassic Park Tyrannosaur Rex (with realistic dinosaur skin!):

My Favorite Christmas Movie: What was the one with Arnold Schwarzenegger? Jingle All the Way! That was always an absurd favorite. Or catching a Home Alone on TV.

Another Random Christmas Fact: I just got rid of last years live tree two weeks ago.

My Favorite Christmas Tradition: Waking up super early, and making (probably horrible) coffee for my parents. That was always their condition - we could wake them up super early, but there had better be some coffee ready.

Dumbest Thing I've Given (or Tried to Give): Well, I tried to give my alcoholic great grandfather a pack of beer once. Turns out seven year olds aren't allowed to buy beer.

My Favorite Christmas Song: I do enjoy Feliz Navidad, only because it may be the most annoying song in the history of the world, and thus I have come to enjoy it. But alas, that is not my favorite. I'll post my favorite song tomorrow, with lyrics. Until then, have a Merry Christmas!

What about You?

NFL: Quick 16

2010-12-23T07:57:00.000-08:00

First a Review:

Correct: Chargers, Bengals (upset), Cowboys, Colts, Chiefs, Carolina, Falcons (lock), Oakland, Patriots, Bears.

Incorrect: Texans, Bills, Eagles, Lions, Ravens, Jets.

Week 15: 10-6

Overall: 131-91

Lock: 11-4

Upset: 5-9

Then the Week 16 Quick Picks:

Steelers, Cowboys, Patriots, Bears, Ravens, Titans (upset), Rams, Dolphins, Jaguars, Chargers (lock), Texans, Colts, Packers, Buccaneers, Eagles, Saints.

Writing Tip: Kill Your Little Darlings

2010-12-21T12:29:00.000-08:00

I can't figure out who said this, because sometimes the internet is too awesome for it's own good... It could have been Anne Lamotte, William Faulkner, Sir Arthur Couch, or Jessica Mitford. Anyway, the point is:

"Kill your darlings."

When we're writing, we sometimes get attached to something. A particular phrasing or joke, or even the style of an entire composition. If we become too attached, and cannot look at something with a critical eye, we end up writing something that in the end only we can appreciate.

I was reminded of this today when receiving some criticism of my book "Ashram," a story of my trip to Varanasi, India. As you may recall, I finished a first (and a second draft) of Ashram probably two years ago. I shopped it around some publishers and agents, but never received too much interest. Since then, I've given it out to individuals to ask what they think, but made few changes to it.

One consistent criticism I have received (and truthfully, also perceived) is that the book is repetitious. It follows a consistent pattern or style. It's a story from India, followed by a life lesson.

I've known since the second draft a far better introduction for the book. But that would mean I would have to kill the pattern and style of the book and rewrite the whole thing, or at least huge chunks. And because I think that pattern really works for a chapter or two, I've struggled to do what is necessary.

But I think I'm going to try. I'm going to kill my darlings.

For those of you that are in any way familiar with my novel, here's what I'm going to do, because I'm a visual thinker. Good luck interpreting!

Mashup: Disneyworld and Abortion

2010-12-17T08:09:00.000-08:00

Perhaps you've heard of Walt Disney? Well, of course you've heard of him. You've probably even heard about Disney World or Disney Land, the very successful theme parks. You may have heard some crazy things about these places and the lengths they go to be the best - they sort trash by hand; they retouch the paint every night; they even have a character who dresses up like a vine and hides around the park in plain sight.

Cool or crazy, right?

Well, one story I've heard that stuck with me is how Walt Disney designed the park. Walt toured theme parks around the world, trying to see what worked and what didn't work.

Oh, and he also counted how far people would walk. Specifically, how far they would walk to find a trash can. On average, Walt figured each person would walk 27 feet to throw away a piece of garbage. Much longer than 27 feet and an average person would simply drop the piece of trash.

Flash forward to Disney World / Land today. Trash cans are situated so that you are never more than 27 feet from a trash can.

Walt wanted a park that was clean and fresh. Instead of posting a sign "Please don't litter" which can be interpreted as insulting or demeaning, Walt simply removed the barrier. He made it easier to get rid of the trash.

I think this is one way that church can grow. Not just in the literal put-a-trash-can-everywhere meaning, but in a metaphorical one.

How can we as a church remove barriers, rather than post prohibitions?

Let's look at one issue that most churches abhor - abortion. I'm pretty sure most churches believe abortion should be illegal. I don't say that churches are "against" abortion because I'm pretty sure that everyone on all sides agrees that in a perfect world, they'd be against abortion.

But how has the church responded to abortion? It seems like there is a lot of guilt and anger directed at those who have done it or are thinking of it; it seems like a giant blinking neon "DON'T DO IT."

But what if the church found ways to stop posting prohibitions and start removing barriers?

Instead of ostracizing teenage moms, taking them in?

Instead of preaching about the immorality of premarital sex, having an open conversation about the beauty of a family?

Instead of basing political decisions on who vows the most to overturn Roe v Wade, vote for whoever shows the most compassion?

These are just the ideas on the top of my head. I think it's something to consider. And I'm not just talking about abortion here - it was a convenient example. How can we as a church remove barriers instead of just posting prohibitions? How do we get rid of our "No Trespassing" signs and tear down our fences?

NFL Column: Goodbye Brett Favre

2010-12-14T09:31:00.000-08:00

Well, it's over. 297.

Even after it became curiously cool to not like Brett Favre, there was a thrill in seeing him every week suit up. Even through the wincing pain and crazy interceptions, you couldn't argue with that.

And now it's over. Some will say good riddance; some will just say good bye.

I, for one, am sad to see Brett go. It's hard to remember if it was him or Barry Sanders that I first knew about in the NFL. My favorite play I remember seeing happened in some regular season Green Bay game, and I couldn't find the youtube link. It was a pitch play to some unnamed Green Bay Running back, and all I remember is Brett Favre leading the way down the field making three downfield blocks. It looked like something out of a college play book, and was pretty tremendous.

I have two regrets for Brett... He should have finished in Green Bay. And, barring that, he should have stayed home this year. I thought that he was milking the injuries and attention this offseason when he didn't come right back... but clearly there was something wrong there. Clearly he reached that line where he wasn't the same. And it was sad to see this season.

Anyway, good bye Brett Favre.

Seriously, good bye. Don't try to come back.

Week 14 Review:

I correctly predicted these winners: Colts, Giants, Steelers, Bucs, Falcons, Jaguars, Saints, 49ers (upset), Patriots, Eagles, and Ravens (lock).

I did not predict these winners: Bills, Lions, Dolphins, Cardinals, and Chargers.

Week: 11-5

Overall: 121-85

Lock: 10-4

Upset: 4-9

Week 15 Picks:

In honor of the corrupt and laughable NCAA, let's name bowl games this week!

49ers at Chargers: The Miraculously-Only-One-Game-Behind Bowl! It's our first West/West clash! Both these teams have slim playoff chances, but a loss effectively removes them from contention. I'll take the Chargers on homefield.

Browns at Bengals: The Formerly-Edge-Of-Elite-Quarterback Bowl! Bengals are bound to win one eventually, so I guess I'll take them in a mini upset.

Redskins at Cowboys: The Desperate-Fanbase Bowl! Seriously, are there any two fanbases who desperately believe they should always be winning but never are more than Dallas and Washington? At least Detroit fans know they're terrible. I'll take the Cowboys at home.

Texans at Titans: The Newly-Eliminated-From-Playoff-Contention Bowl! Saw this on my Milk Carton this morning: "Missing: Randy Moss. Was once a great Fantasy Receiver. Has not been seen in weeks; call Jeff Fisher if you have seen him." Um, Texans I guess.

Jaguars at Colts: The Seriously? Jacksonville? Bowl! Seriously? Jacksonville? I pick the Colts.

Chiefs at Rams: The Division-Leaders-By-A-Miracle Bowl! Both these teams must win to maintain their lead in their dangerous neck and neck divisions... Oh, sorry. I forgot these guys play in the West divisions. Take the Chiefs.

Bills at Dolphins: The Endangered-Species Bowl! Who knows. I hate Miami. I used to feel pity for Buffalo. Just take the home team and pray this game isn't on TV.

Eagles at Giants: The Finally-Someone-To-Tackle-Vick-And-Hurt-Him Bowl presented by PETA! Sorry, had to go there. But here's how good the Giants are at knocking out quarterbacks - they knocked Brett Favre out before the game even started... So I'll take the Giants.

Lions at Buccaneers: The 27-Is-Our-Lucky-Number Bowl! Unfortunately, the Buccaneers can beat crappy teams. Detroit is the epitome of crappy teams. Sidenote 1: through 15 weeks, I have misspelled the Buccaneers every time I tried. Even though my high school team was also the Bucs. Sidenote 2: Blogspot insists that 'Sidenote' is spelled incorrectly and wishes me to change it to 'Si denote.'

Cardinals at Panthers: The Win-By-Punt Bowl! If the defenses weren't so inept, I would have called this the "Win-By-Safety Bowl." Maybe Carolina can eke out a win here.

Saints at Ravens: The It's-Way-Hard-To-Think-Of-Clever-Names-When-Both-Teams-Don't-Suck Bowl! Although the Ravens may suck. They win, but have they impressed you yet? I'll take the Saints.

Falcons at Seahawks: The Bird Bowl! My greatest regret is moving away from Bird Bowl picking earlier this year. Even though Bird Bowling always sucked at making picks. This week, I don't care. I'm sticking with the Bird Bowling and picking Falcons. A falcon could totally beat up a seahawk, right? A seahawk is just a dumb name for a seagull, isn't it? Falcons are the Lock.

Broncos at Raiders: The Tim-Tebow-Introduction Bowl! Because you know that Tebow is coming in. You just don't know when. He's like a shark. You'll never know. I'll take Oakland.

Jets at Steelers: The Arrogant-Schmuck Bowl! Could you assemble a team of worst people? Rex Ryan, Ben Roethlisberger, Mark Sanchez, LDT, and the entirety of the Jets/Steelers organizations? Jets have been badly exposed the past two weeks, and that continues here.

Packers at Patriots: The Funny-Feeling Bowl! Because I have a funny feeling that after we spent the last three weeks comparing the Patriots to the 2007 we're due for a letdown. So I'll take the Packers.

Bears at Vikings: The Who-Cares-Now Bowl! Minnesota went from being the land of drama to the land of snoozes. Bears will probably win.

NFL Column: Playoffs Pictures Presented

2010-12-06T15:13:00.000-08:00

Thoughts

I watched a quarter and a half of football this weekend. And you know what? I appreciated it a lot more. Besides having more time to spend on other things, I didn't spend my weekend zoning out watching a crappy Seattle game. I watched a couple of good quarters of Baltimore - Pittsburgh.

I think that's going to be a good new rule for me. If the game on sucks, I'm just not going to watch it. Why spend 6-8 hours in front of the TV on Sunday watching Pete Carroll acting like he has a soul?

That's my random NFL thought for the week. On to the rest of the column!

Week 13 Review

I correctly predicted that the Eagles, Saints, Packers, Chiefs, Vikings, Giants, Rams, Seahawks, Falcons and Patriots (lock) would all win. I also incorrectly predicted that the Bears (upset), Jaguars, Browns, Raiders, Cowboys, and Steelers would lose. In one note of pride, I did predict that the final score of the Ravens / Steelers game would be 13-10. It was close to being my lock.

Week Record: 9-6

Overall: 110-80

Lock: 9-4

Upset: 3-9

I know my records don't add up, but I'm not sure why. I'm certainly not going back to try to add it all up. This is my best guess at what my records are.

Week 14 Picks

A week of spoiler games! Lots of chances to sort out the playoffs, for crappy teams to rise up and have an impact on the postseason! By my count, 48 teams could be eliminated with a loss this week. Let's get right to it.

Colts at Titans - Whoever loses this game is effectively out of the playoff race. I have no idea what to expect here... If Manning posts another game like that last one, how can Indy win? But what are the chances that he does? And the Titans have been terrible since 'winning' Randy Moss. I'll take the Colts, I guess.

Browns at Bills - Two teams that play to their competition's level, which means that this should be a horrible game, right? I think I'll take Cleveland; Peyton Hillis should have a good game.

Packers at Lions - First playoff spoiler alert! If the Pack doesn't win, they have a hard road to get to the playoffs, because they probably wouldn't catch Chicago. Ultimately, good teams win these games and bad teams lose them. I'll take Green bay.

Giants at Vikings - Another potential spoiler. Giants need to win. And I think they will; their pass rush should knock Favre out on the first drive.

Bengals at Steelers - Let down game for Pittsburgh? Another spoiler game? If Pittsburgh loses this, but Baltimore wins (likely), then Pittsburgh's statement game last week means nothing. Should be a smashmouth game either way, and I like Pittsburgh's chances.

Buccaneers at Redskins - Crappy good team takes on good crappy team? Note: this is potentially a spoiler game, but probably not. Tampa won't make it to the playoffs, but if they lose this one, it's definitely goodbye for that pipe dream. I'll take the Bucs.

Falcons at Panthers - Not a spoiler game, because the Falcons are going to the playoffs regardless. But Carolina can salvage a little bit of pride by giving New Orleans a shot at the 1 seed if the Panthers were to win here. I'm going to say that probably won't happen. Atlanta.

Raiders at Jaguars - Saw what I wrote about Indy/Tennessee above? Probably the same here. The loser doesn't get a playoff berth. I think Oakland has the letdown game here, and Jaguars hang on to their division lead.

Rams at Saints - Tough road for Sam Bradford. To get into the playoffs, he'll need to beat the reigning Superbowl champions, who certainly aren't shoo-in's for the playoffs themselves. The Saints have started to look like they have some of that Superbowl Mojo back, so I'll stick with them.

Seahawks at 49ers - So far, I've picked all the favorites. Time to switch up things, because I'll take the 49ers as my upset. Seattle can't play on the road, we all know this to be true.

Patriots at Bears - How many more teams must the Patriots beat to prove they're the best? I find it absurd that they're listed 2nd in the ESPN Power rankings. Patriots by a mile in this game.

Dolphins at Jets - Jets can beat teams that aren't any good, so they should win this one.

Broncos at Cardinals - Cardinals can't score touchdowns! You have to pick Denver in this game, right? They can at least score.

Chiefs at Chargers - This isn't as exciting a game, because San Diego might have blown their chance to make it to the playoffs last week. If SD wins this, they're still a game behind. I'm jumping off the SD bandwagon - past performance is no indication of future success. San Diego follows their absurd 48 game December/January win streak by an 0-2 December streak this year.

Eagles at Cowboys - Cowboys can save themselves some respect by trying to knock the Eagles out of the playoff race. Don't think they'll succeed. Eagles.

Ravens at Texans - Here's one thing I'm realizing - exactly what type of offense is Baltimore? They have some great receivers, but Joe Flacco doesn't pile up stats. Their running backs are solid, but not spectacular. They just don't seem to have a personality in the way that New England or Pittsburgh or Indy do. That being said, I'll take Baltimore (as a lock even) because Houston has a terrible pass defense. (also, this is a spoiler game!)

Spoilers: I counted 11 teams that can basically knock other teams out of the playoffs this week. (For your records, I counted Texans, Cowboys, Raiders, Jaguars, Rams, Saints, Colts, Titans, Lions, Vikings, and Redskins). So we have two scenarios that could be interesting. All the favored teams win, and we basically know the playoff picture, eradicating a lot of the bottom feeders. Or (my personal favorite) underdogs all win, and we basically set the playoff picture on hold for a week and make things even more muddled.

Week 14... Are you ready for some football?

NFL: Week 13 Picks

2010-12-02T10:28:00.000-08:00

A quick programming note: I'm done with the separate picks/reviews column. Next Wednesday there will be one column - review of week 13, preview of week 14. This must be done, so I feel like I have time to write something else during the week as well. If you don't like it, tough.

The Picks:

Texans at Eagles: This is the relative order of things: Vick > Texans Defense > Rusty Smith. Search your heart; you know this to be true.

Saints at Bengals: Does anyone believe the Bengals are any good? If they fired their coach, I would start to consider them. Stick with the Saints.

Bears at Lions: I'm taking Detroit as my revenge upset. Don't try to talk me out of it.

49ers at Packers: Troy Smith in the snow? Without Frank Gore? Please. Green Bay had so many chances to win last week - if McCarthy threw a challenge flag on any of five separate plays, they probably would have won, and we'd be talking about Green Bay as the best team in the country.

Jaguars at Titans: Flip a coin to see which team shows up. I heard Kerry Collins is playing, so I'll take Tennessee. Question: if Tennessee doesn't win another game this year, do we blame Vince Young or Randy Moss for the season torpedo?

Broncos at Chiefs: Chiefs looked pretty dominant last week. But hey lost very badly to Denver three weeks ago (the finger wagging game!) Plus, let's be honest. The Chiefs looked dominant against ... Seattle. My college flag football team would look good against Seattle, and we were a team of d-bags (even moreso than Cincy!). I'm taking the Chiefs, but I don't feel good about it.

Browns at Dolphins: Who cares. Dolphins.

Bills at Vikings: More who cares. Vikings.

Redskins at Giants: When the Giants win, they look preposterously good (minus last week). When they lose, they look preposterously bad. I think they'll post a good game this week.

Raiders at Chargers: Ah, the Chargers annual late bid for the playoffs. Do you think next year they should play their backups until week 5/6 and then play everyone? That would work right? (I pick SD).

Cowboys at Colts: What if the Colts lose this game? Can you imagine a situation where the Colts don't make it into the playoffs? It's a crazy game with a lot on the line for the Colts, and nothing on the line for Dallas. So, one of two things will happen. Manning will A) be clutch and win on the last drive in some spectacular fashion or B) fall under the pressure and throw a few more picks and lose badly again. I'm not picking against Manning three weeks in a row. It's been a good ride, but I'll go back to safety and take Manning.

Rams at Cardinals: Could the Cardinals go the rest of the season without scoring a touchdown? Believe it. I'll take the Rams. (Although I hope the Cards win so we can see what the worst possible record for a division champ could be).

Panthers at Seahawks: Don't back a crappy team on the road - I'll take Seahawks. See the Cardinals for why I hope Carolina wins though.

Falcons at Buccaneers: I already played an upset so I'll stick with the Falcons.

Steelers at Ravens: I'll take the Ravens. Can I set the Lock of the Week that this game is 13-10? Eh, probably not smart. I'll save the Lock...

Jets at Patriots: ...For this game! Patriots. Lock. I will never forgive you Bill Belichick if you let Mark Sanchez and Rex Ryan get a 1 seed. And that is that.

NFL: Week 12 Quick Review

2010-11-29T12:21:00.000-08:00

Teams I Predicted to Win That Did In Fact Win: Patriots, Jets, Falcons, Steelers, Browns, Giants (Lock), Texans, Chiefs, Ravens, Chargers

Teams I Predicted to Lose That Did Not In Fact Lose: Saints (upset), Vikings, Dolphins, Bears, Rams

Teams I Predicted to Win That Have Not Played Yet: Cardinals

Week Thus Far: 10-5

Overall: 101-73

Lock: 8-4

Upset: 3-8

Fantasy: Up by 23. All that's left is to not get gouged by Frank Gore

Thanksgiving Time

2010-11-25T01:24:00.000-08:00

This is from last year, but still appropriate - 101 (plus a few bonus!)

1. My beautiful wife.
2. Mountain Dew.
3. Jesus (I feel a responsibility to say that these are not in order).
4. A good job.
5. Dave Morgan Haikus.
6. The color blue.
7. Comfortable shoes.
8. Minesweeper.
9. A beautiful apartment.
10. Clean socks.
11. My freaking awesome wife
12. Letter openers that really work.
13. Stand up comedians.
14. Family.
15. Friends across the country.
16. My time in the "man house."
17. Contact lens.
18. Uncertainty of the plural spelling of lens.
19. Coffee.
20. Cool coffee cups.
21. Lost.
22. The Office.
23. An ability to grow facial hair.
24. Naps.
25. Raspberries. The fruit, not the tongue thing.
26. Raspberries. The tongue thing, not the fruit.
27. Kisses.
28. A good pen.
29. A sense of accomplishment.
30. That I don't go to High School anymore.
31. Rewriting stories to make myself look good.
32. A good shave.
33. The letter "A."
34. A nameplate that looks different than everyone elses.
35. Legos.
35. Eggo waffles.
36. Thanksgiving.
37. The Ballance's opening their home to us.
39. God providing in amazing ways as we moved out west.
40. Staple removers.
41. Zombies, in fiction and in real life.
42. The numbers!!! 4 8 15 16 23 42
43. When people write on my facebook.
44. Scratching a good itch.
45. Sleeping in.
46. Any day I don't receive a stupid text message forward.
47. Stanley cup victories for the Detroit Red Wings.
48. A good hockey fight.
49. Youtube clips of Patrick Roy getting humiliated.
50. The grin I get when noone realizes until now that I skipped #38.
51. Remembering serenading my wedding, and Geoff's wedding.
52. Hitting John Lotterhos's car that one time.
53. Crazy Trinidadians going the wrong way in go-karts.
54. Winning free stuff.
55. John Jurries proclaiming my post = win.
56. Jessica Notenbaum yelling at me for not posting.
57. When I beat the Fantasy Guru's predicted score by 60 points.
58. Spring.
59. Flip flops.
60. Bonfires.
61. New groups of friends who haven't heard my jokes 30 times.
62. Friends that don't know I stole a joke from someone else.
63. Moes Burritos.
64. A good yawn.
65. Coffee. Again.
66. Monday Midnight Prayer.
67. Trendy glasses.
68. Small groups.
69. Not using the word "moist."
70. Ipods.
71. My stunning wife.
72. The Sports Guy.
73. Tuesday Morning Quarterback.
74. Sunflower Seeds.
75. Cholula Sauce.
76. Wolfgangs.
77. DVD's.
78. Youth group memories.
79. Power tools.
80. Growing up.
81. Black olives.
82. Digiornios pizza.
83. Scott Adams.
84. An empty inbox.
85. Days off.
86. Presents.
87. Automatic doors that make me feel like a Jedi.
88. Lord of the Rings being better than Star Wars.
89. Surprises.
90. The time I put jolly ranchers in Jamison's shower.
91. The time I drunk wrestled Steve and won.
92. Proposing.
93. Making our wedding our wedding.
94. My groomsmen.
95. Hookahs.
96. My gorgeous wife.
97. That this list is almost over.
98. That 101 is more catchy than 201.
99. That M&M's melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
100. That's what she said.
101. Your name here!

BONUS TIME!!!

102. Cooking Turkey - I really enjoy it!

103. Snow days at the age of 24.
104. Fantasy football being based on luck, not strategy.

105. New cars.

106. Post-it notes.

107. Movie Theaters.

108. Fun board games.

109. A job that is challenging and rewarding.

110. Microsoft Word's "Search and Replace" feature.

111. Detroit Lions playing the part of Turkey every year.

112. The ability to make people laugh.

113. Arrested Development!!! Maybe the funniest show in history?

114. Tuna steaks.

115. Portabella mushrooms.

116. Strategy games.

117. Ordo Ludus.

118. Sabbath Group

119. The Baergens

120. Quelf.

121. New Music.

122. A new laptop!

123. Starcraft. What a great game.

124. Flashbang - an amazing book.

125. Relient K's Christmas albums - making Christmas music bearable.

126. Phone calls from friends.

127. Emails from friends.

128. Pageviews or comments on my blog.

129. My friends Rick and Natalie.

130. A great supervisor at work.

131. Facial hair.

132. The potential of a new house in February.

133. Smartphones. So neat.

134. Angry Birds finally coming to Palm Pre.

135. That one time I got to play a little of Starcraft 2.

136. Having hobbies I enjoy.

137. The Wii my wife gave me for my Birthday.

138. Football season.

139. Haircuts.

140.Eggnog latte's.

141.Sarcasm.

142. Converse All Star Shoes.

143. Funny bumper stickers (on other peoples cars).

144. My coworkers.

145. Secret Santa gift exchanges.

146. A working car heater this winter!

147. New sweaters.

148. Aprons, for cooking.

149. My amazing and thoughtful wife.

150. You!

NFL: Week 12 Picks

2010-11-24T14:35:00.000-08:00

Gah. Thursday games are the bane of me. It means I have to have my fantasy team set Wednesday and my picks on Wednesday. Oh well... Here you go.

Patriots at Lions: Brady will shred the Lions. No contest.

Saints at Cowboys: The Cowboys have started playing up to the potential everyone saw in them at the beginning of the season. So pretend it's last year - Saints at Dallas, who would you pick? Probably New Orleans. But the short week means I'm leaning towards taking Dallas as an upset. If I don't see a better candidate by the end of the review, I'll take Dallas. After review, I'm sticking with this pick. The other candidate is SD/Ind, but that isn't really an "upset" pick.

Bengals at Jets: Ugh. Two gross teams, but the Jets will continue to win.

Packers at Falcons: Game of the week maybe? In a close contest, you should probably take the home team. However, have the Falcons really dominated anyone? This should be a good test for them. I'll take ATL but only barely.

Steelers at Bills: Hoo hoo. I foresee Pittsburgh shutting down Buffalo. Then we have to deal with another week of people pretending Pittsburgh is the best in the league.

Panthers at Browns: There are a few stinker games this week, huh? But then a few great ones. I'll take the Browns here.

Jaguars at Giants: Don't back a crappy team on the road. And New York should win the bounce-back game. This is my Lock.

Vikings at Redskins: Will Minnesota pull a Dallas and suddenly start playing for a coach that they care about? I'm going to say "no" for now and take Washington.

Titans at Texans: What happened to Tennessee? Are they falling off the map? Oh wait, what happened to Houston? Are they falling off the map? I'm going to take Houston here; can you trust a guy named Rusty Smith?

Dolphins at Raiders: Take the home team. Whatever you do, don't actually bet on this game.

Chiefs at Seahawks: Or this game. I don't like either team. I'm going to pick against Seattle because I like rooting against them.

Eagles at Bears: Take Michael Vick until he looks mortal.

Rams at Broncos: Rough game to pick. I guess I'll take Kyle Orton.

Buccaneers at Ravens: Ravens should be win this one. Tampa Bay hasn't won against any good teams, I think. Maybe New Orleans.

Chargers at Colts: I'm going to take the Chargers. They always seem to have the Colts number.

49ers at Cardinals: Ugh. What an ugly monday night game. I'll take Cardinals (home team).

NFL: Week 11 Quick Review

2010-11-22T11:41:00.000-08:00

Correct Picks: Cowboys, Chiefs, Packers, Jets, Steelers, Ravens, Falcons, Saints (lock), Patriots, Eagles

Incorrect Picks: Bears, Bengals, Redskins, Jaguars (upset), Buccaneers

Still to Play: Broncos and Chargers (I have San Diego)

Week Thus Far: 10-5

Overall Record: 90-68

Upset: 3-7

Lock: 7-4

Fantasy: I got shredded by Peyton and Greg Jennings.

NFL: Week 11 Picks

2010-11-18T10:04:00.000-08:00

Bears at Dolphins: Don't back a crappy team on the road. But I've been letting my bias for Chicago play into my picks all year, and that hasn't worked well for me. I'm still taking the Dolphins - but if Chicago wins this week I may need to stop picking against them.

Bengals at Bills: Ugh. I hope this isn't the game they decide to play here in Seattle. Which, by the way, shows the crappiest games each week! If I'm not stuck watching Seattle (who seriously haven't played an exciting game all year - each week they either get blown out or the other team doesn't show up), then I'm stuck watching the dumb Vikings or something. I guess I'll take the Bengals.

Lions at Cowboys: Don't foresee that road streak ending this week. Although, it would be like the Cowboys this season to blow this game by 40 points. I'll still take the Cowboys and dare Detroit to make me wrong.

Redskins at Titans: Both teams come off losses; Tennessee's may have been more devastating as far as playoff hopes go. Now Ten has a very tight race in the AFC South where they could have been in a tie with the Colts. I think on home turf I'll take the Titans. Moss? I predict he gets 5 catches, 40 yards, and a garbage TD. Actually, I hope he does that well.

Cardinals at Chiefs: Um, Chiefs. Cardinals just have no weapons; they get to be next years Carolina Panthers.

Packers at Vikings: Don't let the door hit you on the way out Brett! Because once Rodgers embarasses you (again) I can't imagine you'll stick around much longer. Whether that's your choice, or Childress's, or Zygi's, I don't know. Side note: Isn't Zygi Wilf the coolest owner name in Pro Football?

Texans at Jets: I don't know. I want so badly to pick against the Jets, who are the clearly the worst 7-2 team. But here's the truth - Matt Schaub was in the hospital for a ?bursa? sac. Or something. And if that's the case... Dan Orlovsky. So I'll be safe and pick the Jets.

Raiders at Steelers: Ooh, possible upset pick. But I still don't buy the Raiders. This maybe their toughest game, so if they win on Sunday then I'll start giving them respect. Until then, I'll pick the Steelers.

Ravens at Panthers: Ravens by a mile? Actually, this could be one of those games where the Ravens win 13-3 or something. I'm starting Joe Flacco (as of now, perhaps change my mind by the end of this post) and hoping for the best.

Browns at Jaguars: Two teams that show up against superior teams and suck against inferior teams. I guess I'll take the Browns as my upset as the Jags are still probably celebrating after that crazy Hail Mary.

Falcons at Rams: Don't be a hero. I'll take the Falcons. I like the Rams in this game to keep it close; it's just that the Falcons have the ability to come through in the clutch. Roddy White pushing a guy down can do that for you, I guess.

Seahawks at Saints: La-la-lock! Here's a cool one: this is possibly a preview of the first round of the playoffs. Seahawks are going to win their crappy division (unless San Fran manages to pull it out, which is not entirely impossible) and take the 4th seed. So they're going to play the 5th seed, who will probably have 2-3 more wins on their record. So Seattle will play the fifth seed, which will be either Atlanta/New Orleans or New York/Philadelphia. At this point, I'm thinking it will be New Orleans. So New Orleans will come to Seattle and just flat out blow Pete Carroll out of the water. I'm so excited I'm getting tingles.

Buccaneers at 49ers: San Francisco, taking cards from San Diego play book? Crap out the first two months, then be good enough to squeak a playoff berth? I'll take San Fran this week.

Colts at Patriots: In 2008, the Detroit Red Wings had to play the Colorado Avalanche in the second round of the playoffs. There was quite a bit of history to that rivalry. What happened? Detroit blew Colorado out in 4 games, where Johan Franzen singlehandedly outscored the entire Colorado team. Why am I writing about this now? In some ways, this game feels like that - people are excited to renew the rivalry between these two perennial AFC champions. I have a sneaking suspicion we're about to find out that it isn't close anymore. I just have really zero idea who that favors. Guess I'm sticking with home team - New England.

Giants at Eagles: This (along with the IND/NE game) is a game of the week, in my opinion. For the lead in the division, am I right, or am I right? I'll take the Eagles; the only hope New York has is to hurt Vick early. Vick is a madman this year. Well, I guess he was always a madman. Literally. I like puppies.

Broncos at Chargers: Chargers have the third ranked pass defense. Bronco's have no running game, really. So I'm gonna take the Chargers. (and in researching the pass defense, I have decided to stick with Joe Flacco as my Fantasy QB this week).

On Maturity

2010-11-15T21:07:00.000-08:00

Interesting week. I'm prepared to chime in on a few different topics this week, but I figured I would start with a discussion on maturity.

To get the topic started, why don't you look at Donald Miller's post: I Know how Old You Are. If you're too lazy to click over, the main point that Donald seems to be making is that the vast majority of his criticisms come from young angry white male twenty year olds. And Don relates it to a discussion of maturity.

What made Don's post stick with me was something that happened to me last week - I received a verbal warning from my supervisor. I don't want to examine the content of the warning presently (perhaps later this week), but I do want to examine the possibilities I have for response.

The first response, the angry white twenty-year-old male response is:

"Well, that's unfair. Most of that is beyond my control. It's certainly not my fault; if other people took a second to listen to my side of it, then they would understand."

This would probably not be an unfounded response. I'm sure I could respond line-by-line from everything my supervisor said and justify and explain every single one of my actions that led to the warning. And I think, bottom line, this response comes from a place of fear; a moment where I (or whomever) is thinking only about protecting myself and my 'territory.'

So while that wouldn't be an unfounded response, it certainly wouldn't be a mature one. So let's look at the second response:

"You know what, you're right. I handled these situations poorly, and my response cost something, whether that's in relationships or reputation. I own that, and need to find ways to improve my ability to act and react appropriately."

Now, this post is not to set about and pat myself on the back for my response. I'm fairly confident that I responded in both immature and mature ways (and even if I didn't do so in the actual meeting, I did so in my head). This post is to help remind me to continue growing in that regard.

I look back at my life, and I see situations that have arisen where a response was called for. And there are far too many situations where the response I made was the immature and defensive response; one that wasn't made with growth in mind. I have made many responses in my life based on a fear of even looking bad; I have often entered into situations like the one I did this week with the sole thought of 'how do I come out of this intact? How do I not let this overthrow the status quo? How do I make it clear that this isn't my fault?'

What should I learn from this experience? What does this tell me about who I have been? What does this reveal about who I am? How does this impact who I want to be? These are much better questions to ask in this sort of situation.

In another way of looking at it, immaturity is about protecting my territory, and making sure I don't have to move. It's a turtle that just hides when ever any situation appears dangerous. A better, more mature response, is that of a whale - never staying in the same place, never settling, never retreating, never panicking.

I hope this makes sense and isn't just me rambling. Tell me what you think in the comments below.

Oh, and check back later this week for: NFL week 11 picks, further discussion of the warning, a discussion about being hip, and who knows what else.

Grace and Peace

NFL: Week 10 Quick Review

2010-11-15T10:10:00.000-08:00

Correct Picks: Falcons, Jets, Colts, Bucs (lock), Jaguars, 49ers (upset)

Incorrect Picks: Bills, Bears, Dolphins, Broncos, Cowboys, Seahawks, Patriots

Still to Play: Eagles vs Redskins (I picked the Eagles)

Week Thus Far: 6-7

Overall Record: 79-63

Upset: 3-6

Lock: 6-4

Fantasy: I'm up 104-84. I have one player left to play (Eagles - DEF) and the other team has none left. I won handily on the strong play of Roddy White and Kyle Orton.

NFL: Week 10 Quick Picks

2010-11-11T09:11:00.000-08:00

Correction from my post the other day: I'm really 73-57. Hard to keep track of.'

Here are the picks:

Ravens at Falcons: Gonna take the Falcons. I'm secretly worried about Baltimore - they haven't won resoundingly yet.

Lions at Bills: Shouldn't back a crappy team on the road, but I can't pick an 0-8 team either. And Detroit has been in every game but one, so I'll take Buffalo... Wait, that was a freudian slip. I'll take Detroit.

Vikings at Bears: Shouldn't back a crappy team on the road... But Chicago? I'll take the Vikes.

Jets at Browns: Shouldnt back... Just kidding! I'll take the Jets and hope for Cleveland to win it. How much would you pay if Colt McCoy winged a pass straight into Rex Ryan's stupid face?

Bengals at Colts: In anyone-but-the-Colts-Land, this might be a let down game. Oh wait, Colts already did that, last week. I'll take the Colts.

Titans at Dolphins: I like the Titans a lot in this game. I don't think Miami can keep up with Tennessee on offense, so we'll probably see another game like last week, when Baltimore won 26-10.

Panthers at Buccaneers: Buc's as the lock.

Texans at Jaguars: Two who gives a crap teams. Flip a coin and take the home team.

Chiefs at Broncos: Two things to know about this game: I'm picking the chiefs, but I'm also expecting Kyle Orton to have an amazing fantasy game.

Cowboys at Giants: I don't feel right picking the Giants as a lock two weeks in a row. It's putting Lock-Of-The-Week on easy-mode, so I'm just going to take the Giants. But not as a lock.

Seahawks at Cardinals: Cardinals. Don't back a crappy team on the road.

Rams at 49ers: 49ers. Don't back a crappy team on the road. I guess this is my upset.

Patriots at Steelers: Steelers, with the homefield advantage. On a neutral field, I would edge Steelers. In New England, I would edge NE. But at Pittsburgh? I'll be safe and take Pitt.

Eagles at Redskins: Ooh, a controversy to brew right before the second rematch. I'll take the Eagles this time - if Vick was in that last game, they would have blown out the Redskins.

NFL: Week 9 Quick Review

2010-11-08T11:40:00.000-08:00

Correct Picks: Falcons, Jets, Vikes, Saints, Ravens, Chargers, Giants, Raiders, Packers.

Incorrect: Bears (Forte had >17 carries but they still won), Patriots (me and the rest of the world), and Colts.

I nailed my upset (San Diego) and my lock (Giants). I'm going to lose in Fantasy and break a four game winning streak unless Hines Ward goes nuts and scores 20 points tonight.

Week: 9-3

Overall: 72-55

Lock: 5-4

Upset: 2-6

Quick Lions Thoughts:

1. Whoever called a throw on 3rd and 6 with 1:40 left when Jets had no timeouts deserves to be fired. As well as the knucklehead with the late hit on LT on the ensuing drive.

2. I thought it was cute novelty that Suh tried to kick an extra point. Then we lost in OT - that one point would have won the game.

3. Matthew Stafford. Hurt again. At this point, doesn't his Career Shoulder Injuries outnumber his Career Wins?

NFL: Week 9 Picks

2010-11-04T10:35:00.000-07:00

63-54 right now. Effectively tied with Dave Morgan. (A tie is like kissing your sister). Let's look at the picks for Week 9.

Buccaneers at Falcons: I'll take the Falcons. As Dave pointed out, Bucs haven't beaten anyone of note yet.

Bears at Bills: Jeez, who knows. Buffalo is terrible, but they have been quite frisky the past few weeks. Buffalo has the worst rushing defense in the NFL, allowing 188 yards a game. But, this is Mike Martz, who may never run the ball, instead throwing against what is the 6th?!? best pass defense in the game. And, repeat the mantra - don't back crappy teams on the road. Can I make this a conditional pick? If Matt Forte gets less than 17 carries, Buffalo wins. Otherwise Chicago.

Patriots at Browns: I don't think the Browns have two major upsets in them this year, do you? I'll take Brady.

Jets at Lions: Everything points to a Lions loss. They haven't won back to back games in forty years. Jets are a little embarassed. And Defense trumps Offense. And AFC trumps NFC. I could go on, but I'll just take the Jets and be extremely happy if I'm wrong.

Cardinals at Vikings: I had to laugh at Dave's blog, where he wrote that there weren't any crazy headlines for this game. Oh, so Childress releasing Moss without letting the owner of the team know isn't a headline? I think Vikes will win this one and relieve a tiny bit of pressure off Childress.

Saints at Panthers: Um, Saints.

Dolphins at Ravens: Unstoppable road team meats... good-to-great team? Ultimately, this is a dangerous game for both teams, but I'll take the home team.

Chargers at Texans: I shouldn't back a crappy team on the road, but the Chargers may be the best 3-5 team in history, right? I guess I'll take San Diego as my Upset?

Giants at Seahawks: Seattle isn't a good team. The Giants may be the best team in the NFC. Easy enough. Oh, and watch for Charlie Whitehurst once Hasselbeck gets ripped in half! That's my Lock.

Chiefs at Raiders: Flip a coin. I'll take Raiders at home.

Colts at Eagles: I want to say Colts are due for a letdown, but I'm done picking against them. Colts.

Cowboys at Packers: This game looks like it's headed for fluke territory. The Cowboys are terrible, but couldn't you see them coming out and be embarassingly good in a sunday night game? Couldn't you? No. I guess not. Take the Packers.

Steelers at Bengals: Monday night game - I do wonder if this could be a game that TO and Ochocinco might thrive in. And then I remember that they're still be thrown to by Carson Palmer. So I'll stay safe and take the Steelers.

In Fantasy, I'm 4-0 the last 4 weeks. I sense this week won't be as good though. Have to hope for big games from Joe Flacco, Roddy White, Matt Forte, and (gulp) Darren Sproles or Deangelo Williams

Doing the Guest Post Deal

2010-11-02T11:46:00.000-07:00

Hola loyal readers!

Today I'm blogging at Journey of a Dad. Come over and read it!

(P.S. No, I'm not a dad yet.)

NFl: Week 8 Review

2010-10-29T09:25:00.001-07:00

Overall a good week: here's the review (my picks in italics, winners in bold).

Dolphins at Bengals
Jaguars at Cowboys (lock)
Redskins at Lions
Bills at Chiefs
Panthers at Rams
Packers at Jets
Broncos at 49ers
Titans at Chargers
Seahawks at Raiders
Vikings at Patriots
Buccaneers at Cardinals
Steelers at Saints

Week: 9-3
Year: 63-53
Lock: 4-4
Upset: 1-6

Still Upcoming:
Texans at Colts (upset)

To clarify, I did take the Texans. I realize that the end of my picks post could have been interpreted as a Colts pick, but I am taking the Texans as an upset.

Also, my fluke of the week didn't turn out to be that fluky, I guess. Fluke of the week probably should have gone to Green Bay / NYJ - who would have predicted that game?

In Fantasy Football, I'm going to win my fourth game in a row if Donald brown doesn't score 17 more points than Jacoby Jones tonight. I'm only at 72 points; I think I have a tremendous luck streak going. Look at it like this - I had Felix Jones, Randy Moss, Nick Folk, and Hines Ward starting. I think those four spots totalled 5 points. But then I got monster games from Marcedes Lewis and the Oakland Raiders Defense, and mediocre games from Kyle Orton and Darren Sproles (my backup backup RB). Weird.

NFL: Week 8 Picks

2010-10-29T09:18:00.000-07:00

I'm having an up and down year. Two weeks ago, I went 5-9. One week ago, 10-4. This week, 4-10. Does this mean I'm due for another up week?

In fantasy, I started the season with a 4 game winless streak, and am now on a three game winning streak.This week, my MVP Roddy White is on a bye, along with "Matt good when Mike Martz remembers he's there Forte." So I've put in Jacoby Jones (definite underperformer this year, but NFL.com still predicts he'll get 15 points this week?) and Felix Jones. Dallas has to go to Felix with Romo out, right? Right?!?

A few things I'm thinking about this week, a few principles... The first and foremost is something Bill Simmons says. Don't be a hero - just try to win money. I'm not going to overthink my picks. The second principle? Don't back a crappy team on the road. If I had gone with this piece of common sense, I wouldn't have taken Jags, Rams, 49ers, Cards, or the Vikings. That's a five game swing.

On to the picks:

Dolphins at Bengals: I guess I'll take the Dolphins, who are pretty good on the road. Shrug. I'm also listing this as my Fluke of the Week. Who knows what will happen? But I think this is the game that has the most potential to have the weirdest outcome.

Jaguars at Cowboys: Jaguars are a crappy team, on the road. So I take Dallas. Also, Lock.

Redskins at Lions: Gonna take the Lions... Washington is a semi crappy team, and Donovan McNabb is secretly terrible this year; but no one notices because Washington is still doing better than expected.

Bills at Chiefs: Don't over think it. Take the Chiefs.

Panthers at Rams: Crappy team on the road. St Louis lost devastating last week, should rebound.

Packers at Jets: Two big principles in play: 1) when in doubt, take the home team and 2) when in doubt, take the AFC team.

Broncos at 49ers: I'm gonna break my rule already and take the Broncos. Geez, that sounds dumb. I wonder if I'm taking the Broncos so much because I have Kyle Orton in fantasy. But San Francisco is 1-6. Actually, I'm changing my pick right here to San Fran. Don't back crappy teams on the road. Say it with me!

Titans at Chargers: The Titans are bound to throw a game, and the Chargers are bound to win one by sheer talent, eventually, right?

Seahawks at Raiders: Repeat the mantra. I'm so tempted, because this is a classic let down game for Oakland, right? But Seattle can't win on the road. Unless they play Chicago. Who sucks.

Vikings at Patriots: Randy Moss is bound to have a huge game, but New England doesn't have the media ridiculousness (for once). This game scares me because eventually I think Brett Favre will singlehandedly win a game; I just don't know if it's here and now.

Buccaneers at Cardinals: Easy enough, because Buc's just won an emotional game on the last play or whatever, so they're due for a let down. I also think they're better at home then away.

Steelers at Saints: Remember for the GB/NYJ game when I listed two principles? They are at odds here... Home team vs AFC team. Ultimately, I think Pittsburgh realizes they escaped Miami barely and New Orleans is angry about losing to Cleveland. I think New Orleans can win this one.

Texans at Colts: And here we go... I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna play against Manning in a night game. I'm going to take the Texans as an upset. Screw that "don't be a hero."

Wisdom

2010-10-28T10:11:00.001-07:00

As you may know, I work for a Skilled Nursing Facility. One of the other staff members is our chaplain, Dave Passey. Dave shared yesterday from James 3:17, and particularly 7 qualities of wisdom, which I have reproduced below:

· Pure: Untainted by selfish motives.
· Peaceable: Diffuses conflict and brings the peace of Christ.
· Gentle: Seeks to understand before judging.
· Willing to yield: Not insistent on its own viewpoint.
· Full of mercy and good fruit: Showing patience and willing to give others space.
· Impartial: Shows no favoritism.
· Without hypocrisy: Lives a life of integrity, i.e. walks the talk.

I chose to put this on here today because I feel it's important to meditate on, because there is a veritable difference between Intelligence and Wisdom.

One of the gifts I have is intelligence. There is no real way to say this and sound humble, but the truth I very rarely do not feel more intelligent than anyone else in the room. It actually throws me off my edge when I'm in the company of someone who is smarter than me.

But I definitely don't have much wisdom some times. I make lots of mistakes that should be easy to see coming. And I think that comes from a realm of dealing with people (wisdom) versus a realm of the physical world (intelligence). I think you can see that most of those points above refer to relationships with people, rather than relationships with things.

Here's what I mean: Intelligence can tell me that someone needs encouragement. Wisdom can tell me how and when to encourage them. In some ways, Wisdom makes intelligence superfluous. If you can successfully understand the people around you, you can go far.

Most successful leaders are people of wisdom. Most successful managers are people of intelligence. I think I would be pretty successful as a manager but not that successful as a leader.

So that's one of my goals; to go from doing well with the world around me to doing well with the people around me.

NFL: Week 7 Review

2010-10-20T15:38:00.000-07:00

Shrug. I told you it was a pick em affair. I think next week I'll start a new type of pick, to replace the long forgotten x-factor - the Fluke of the Week (this week: Oakland!)

Bengals at Falcons

Redskins at Bears

Eagles at Titans

Jaguars at Chiefs

Steelers at Dolphins

Browns at Saints

Rams at Buccaneers

49ers at Panthers

Bills at Ravens

Cardinals at Seahawks

Raiders at Broncos

Patriots at Chargers (Upset)

Vikings at Packers

Giants at Cowboys (Lock)

Week: 4-10
Year: 54-50
Lock: 4-3
Upset: 1-6

NFL: Week 7 Picks

2010-10-20T15:32:00.000-07:00

Quite the slate of weird games this week. I think it's entirely possible to misread the week and end up with another 6-10 or 5-11 week. 10 of the 14 games have spreads of less than 5 points. Ah randomness, to the picks.

Bengals at Falcons: See, this is a game I don't know about. I wonder if Carson Palmer could rebound. But I also think the Falcons could rebound. The line for the game is ATL +4; I think I'll take Atlanta. Homefield wins in case of doubt.

Redskins at Bears: Jeez, two games in a row. Raise your hand if you think the Bears are any good. Now raise your hand if you think the Redskins are any good. Washington lost a close one to Indianapolis; and the Bears looked horrible against the Seahawks. If I was to guess, I would think Mike Martz will do the smart thing and actually use Matt Forte again. But Washington has to see that coming.... BAH! I'll take Bears.

Eagles at Titans: Both teams came off impressive wins last week. But I still think the Titans may be a great rough team in the making, so I'll take them.

Jaguars at Chiefs: The first 8 teams so far have been maddeningly imprecise. Who knows in any of these picks? Seriously, flip a coin. A hometeam gets three points for being a hometeam, and ATL is +4, Bears and Titans are +3. And Chiefs/Jags are even. I'm going to pick the Jaguars though; big rebound game for MJD.

Steelers at Dolphins: Now we start to get some games that are easier to pick. Steelers. Miami hasn't beaten anyone of importance yet (Minn? Green Bay? Buffalo?).

Browns at Saints: Ooh, possible trap game? Or are the Saints back to form? This is a good litmus test. If the Browns stay in or win this game, I think we can probably safely write off New Orleans. Since I'm not ready for that, I'll pick the Saints. (Maybe the Madden curse is hitting the players around Drew Brees, huh?)

Rams at Buccaneers: Can you believe these teams are both decent this year? And the winner has a decent look at the playoffs? I'm picking St Louis. I think they're a more complete team.

49ers at Panthers: Homedog syndrome. So I'll take Carolina... Crickets chirp. Wait, that's a dumb idea. I'll take San Francisco.

Bills at Ravens: Championship teams blow out these sort of games. See what the Jets did to Buffalo a few weeks ago, now realize that the Ravens are better than the Jets. I pick the Ravens.

Cardinals at Seahawks: Does anyone know if either of these teams are even average? I guess I'll take Arizona; Seattle didn't win last week, Chicago lost.

Raiders at Broncos: Denver, by a mile. They're getting desperate. (Side note: are they perhaps the most fun team to watch right now? They basically run a Madden videogame offense and every game seems to end on the last play.)

Patriots at Chargers: I'm gonna maybe cheat a little and take San Diego as my Upset. Patriots are traveling across the coast and just won an emotional game against the Ravens.

Vikings at Packers: Armageddon. Is Brett distracted? Is he finally going to have a Favre game where he throws a ton of passes that miraculously get caught? I think I'll take the Vikings. They played a solid game and let Dallas beat themselves; and I think it will help their confidence this week.

Giants at Cowboys: Giants are getting a little too full of themselves, so I'll take Dallas as the Lock.

NFL: Week 6 Review

2010-10-19T12:38:00.000-07:00

Woo! Let's take a look at the picks (mine in italics, correct in bold):

Seahawks at Bears

Dolphins at Packers

Chargers at Rams

Ravens at Patriots

Lions at Giants

Falcons at Eagles

Browns at Steelers (lock)

Saints at Buccaneers

Chiefs at Texans

Jets at Broncos

Raiders at 49ers
Cowboys at Vikings

Colts at Redskins

Titans at Jaguars

Week: 10-4

Year: 50-40

Lock: 4-2

Upset: 1-5

Heck yeah, what a good weekend. I went 10-4, won my Fantasy game by .8 points, and looked nearly prescient. My Denver as upset pick was my sole heartbreaker; and that I blame on the rest of the country jumping on my bandwagon and picking the same upset. Here's a rule: if 90% of the country thinks it's an upset, 90% of the time it won't be. So my upset got... upset?

Let's look real quick at a few other NFL predictions; I already detailed how well I'm doing having picked the division winners.

Best Prediction:

Overhyped: Dallas Cowboys, New York Jets, and one of either: Green Bay, Baltimore, San Diego. At least two of those teams will miss the playoffs, but they're all ranked in the top 8 of Sports Illustrated's Power Rankings.

I nailed that, huh? Dallas and San Diego for sure, and possibly Green Bay.

Worst Prediction:

Ultra Surprise Dark Horse: Ladies and gentlemen, the Cleveland Browns!

A swing and a miss!

Writing

2010-10-18T15:18:00.000-07:00

I've been musing about writing again for some time. I've been thinking about what I should be writing; which is encouraging. Too often I fall into the trap of I should be writing and stop thinking about the why or the content.

I see it on this blog. Other than my NFL posts, which aren't what I consider writing, the blog has been pretty sparse. Occasionally I'll break through and write something meaningful, but I'll confess that sometimes it feels like pulling teeth.

I've long believed that life moves in cycles. Specifically, my creative impulses move like the tides - there is a definite ebb and flow. I will go through a period where I absolutely devour books; another time where I am literally writing so much for the blog that I have to plan it out and think about what meshes well; and other times I'm very engrossed in gaming and strategic thoughts. Certainly, I do all of these at the same time; but one of them will tend to dominate my free time. For example, just because I'm reading a ton, doesn't mean I won't be playing Warhammer.

I think the cycles each represent something for me:

a) Reading is my input cycle. I devour books when I'm in this cycle. It's not uncommon for me to hit up a used book store and bring home four books of different genre's and read them in the space of a single weekend. I think this is what opens me up to new ideas and new thought processes. I let thoughts and concepts enter my brain and soak in.

b) Gaming is my vegetative cycle. I'm shutting down the input and output sections of my brain and testing what I've learned. Sometimes this plays out on a tabletop or in a video game; sometimes it just plays out in my imagination and thought processes. This is a period of testing; of divination; of sorting out the wheat from the chaffe.

c) Writing is the output cycle. After learning and after testing, I can go through a period where I find new ways to express and create what I've learned. I pour out what's been rattling around until I'm empty again.

Right now, I feel myself pulling out of the gaming cycle and moving towards a writing cycle. I'll still 'game' and still read, but I think I feel major creative potential welling. I'm planning to take advantage of that and write something; perhaps something more than can be contained on this blog. A few projects that have been more or less on hold:

1. Ashram - Needs a rewrite to get to a third draft.

2. My Mom's Story - Only ever wrote two chapters.

3. 337 - Mostly defunct at this point. Would need a few other life changes to get back to this.

4. Various Fictional Ideas - No work done besides preliminary dreaming and basic plotting.

Writing those out, my gut leans towards writing more of my Mom's story. That's hard, but the other projects seem harder in my mind. And it would be good to have this particular story out of the way. I think my goal will be to have something new completed (first draft) by Christmas.

Anyway, that's a bit of a peak into the creative process for me and a bit of my thought process currently. I would appreciate any encouragement you have!

NFL: Week 6 Picks

2010-10-13T12:36:00.000-07:00

Before we make the week 6 picks, I have a few thoughts:

Here are the 09/10 Division winners: Dallas, Minnesota, New Orleans, Arizona, New England, Cincinnati, Indianapolis, San Diego. They are currently 17-17, and the only one currently leading their division is the horrid Arizona Cardinals.

Now imagine if... You picked your preseason division winners as the above list and you're only change was to take San Francisco and Pittsburgh (respectable preseason picks). Congrats, you are 15-20.

For the record, my divisional winners were Ravens, Chargers, Colts, Patriots, Saints, Packers, Eagles, and Cardinals. I'm 24-15.

The Picks:

Seahawks at Bears: Well, this is getting ridiculous. I can't keep making excuses for the Bears, who keep winning despite being the worst 4-1 team in history. They're soon to be the worst 5-1 team in history, because Seattle is even worse on the road. Another big game for Matt Forte.

Dolphins at Packers: Will Aaron Rodgers play? That effects my pick, I think. If it's Matt Flynn playing, I'll take the Dolphins. In fact, if Green Bay wasn't edging into mental desperation mode, I would still take them, but I think if Rodgers plays I'll take the Packers.

Chargers at Rams: San Diego is still pretty bad on the road. But I don't think Sam Bradford can put up the 400 yards or whatever to beat Philip Rivers. Bradford is good, but he's not great. Yet.

Ravens at Patriots: Ooh, tough game to pick. I'll take the Patriots (homefield).

Lions at Giants: Could the Lions win two in a row for the first time since 1903? Uh, nope. I hope Matt Stafford doesn't play this game - the Giants still have an ugly defense who would be only too happy to break another quarterback. Giants win.

Falcons at Eagles: I sense that if I hated the Falcons like I hate the Bears, I would find lots of reasons to doubt them... So I'll pick Philadelphia.

Browns at Steelers: Lock of the Week. Colt McCoy on the road at Pittsburgh... That should be pretty terrifying for Cleveland people.

Saints at Buccaneers: It amuses me to think that I could almost take this an upset by picking New Orleans. But yeah, New Orleans wins. (Tampa Bay has a better record than NO; isn't that insane?)

Chiefs at Texans: I still think the Chiefs fluked out for three games. Texans are a solid team and should win this one.

Jets at Broncos: Home field advantage, and Kyle Orton has already shown that he can shred a good passing defense. And the Jets didn't exactly shut down Flacco/Brady/Favre. I'll pick Bronco's in my Upset of the Week.

Raiders at 49ers: Classic let down game for Oakland, right? And San Francisco has to win eventually. Might as well take them now.

Cowboys at Vikings: Who is more desperate? Here's my real question - at what point will Favre just say "This is ridiculous. I'm retiring effective immediately." Week 8? 9? Seriously, he has no reputation left. He's no longer "having fun out there." And would he risk his starting streak ended by a sexting allegation? I think Dallas comes out and throttles him, and he decides to pack it up. Thursday Update: I change my pick to the Vikings. Gotta remember they won 34-3 last year.

Colts at Redskins: When will the Colts start playing like the Colts? Probably this week. I tell you what scares me though... I have no doubt that the Colts will win 10 straight every season. And if they don't start the season with that craziness, they're going to end with it.

Titans at Jaguars: The Jaguars aren't a good team, and Tennessee might be a great team. Titans have lost to Pittsburgh, who may be one of the best AFC teams, and to Denver - the game in which everyone started to realize that Kyle Orton might start shredding records this year. Kyle Freaking Orton. Anyway, I'll take the Titans.

I'll be reviewing more of my preseason predictions with the review of these picks next week. Enjoy!

NFL: Week 5 Review

2010-10-12T07:54:00.000-07:00

Horrible weekend... Let's look at the picks (mine in italics, winner in bold)

Jaguars at Bills

Buccaneers at Bengals

Falcons at Browns
Rams at Lions
Chiefs at Colts
Packers at Redskins
Bears at Panthers
Broncos at Ravens (lock)
Giants at Texans
Saints at Cardinals
Titans at Cowboys
Chargers at Raiders
Eagles at 49ers
Vikings at Jets (upset)

Week Record: 5-9
Year Record: 40-36
Lock of the Week: 3-2
Upset of the Week: 1-4

0-4 Teams... I picked Detroit, San Francisco, and Carolina to win. Detroit did (largest victory margin since 1995, I think I read). On another note, I was 0-4 in fantasy and finally won. Pretty sure Buffalo will be the last winless team.

Fantasy Debate.... I picked up Kyle Orton at the season start for kicks and giggles... that's working out pretty well, I guess. Except I keep playing Flacco. I think I'm going to try and trade one this week for a solid running back to go with Matt Forte.

Week 6: I have no idea what to expect from this schizophrenic season. Maybe I should throw darts?

Goat?

2010-10-09T09:17:00.000-07:00

Some of you may be asking why that Goat is ruining my profile picture. More mean spirited readers may be wondering why Andy is ruining that Goat's profile picture.

Well, the Goat (I have decided his name is Rufus) and I have decided to partner up and promote World Concern's Global Gift Guide. World Concern is a Christian World Relief Organization, and part of CRISTA Ministries, where I work.

The Global Gift Guide is just that - a guide to donating money to World Concern. Instead of your standard donation, you can elect to buy a gift for people in other countries. The gifts range in price and include chickens, vaccines, teaching, and yes, goats (amongst other things).

I encourage you to take a look and see if you'd like to donate anything this year. The Global Gift Guide is found here; if you specifically want to buy a goat, try here.

And no, Rufus is not for sale.