I told you earlier that I think of New Years as a time to set your theme for the next year. It only seems smart then to think about the “theme” of last year, 2010 then.
In some ways, 2010 was a “down to earth” year. I spent time discovering that areas in which I told myself I would be skilled in were areas that I even struggled with competency. For example:
- · Discovering that I’m not the perfect husband I always imagined I would be (I hurt my wife a lot more than I imagined, sometimes knowingly so)
- · Learning that I still struggle at being a good employee (I still have trouble putting forth a 5/5 effort)
- · Figuring out that I like being a writer much more than I like writing (I wrote very little of significance this year – my blog totals were skewed because of Lost recaps and NFL picks)
- · Realizing that there are consequences to not being in a church (the few times I’ve lead devotions this year haven’t exactly been successful)
- · Seeing that I like to talk about new experience more than do them (I sure like to just go to the same restaurants over and over)
- · Heck, I didn’t even master Warhammer in the way I imagined (I took 5th out of an 12 player tournament, which isn’t that impressive)
So these are expectations I had for 2010, and ways in which I came short. There are two components to any sort of ‘failure’ in goal setting –
- 1. The Goal – did I set my expectations too high?
- 2. The Performance – did I put forth my best effort?
I don’t think any of the goals I set were poor. They are all good things to aspire to. But I struggled with reaching them. I struggled with an image I set for myself that I didn’t reach.
In some ways, the struggles of 2010 have resulted in the most aimless year of my life. I couldn’t hit my goals, and thus the idea of setting goals beyond those seemed like madness. There were literal parts of my life this year where I was looking forward to something coming that was many weeks away. I couldn’t enjoy the moments I was in.
There was no build to my life last year. I was in a stalling flight pattern, waiting for orders to land. A great movie or book builds the tension; each chapter further tightens and changes the narrative to come.
So this year, here to the build. Here’s to seeing progress. Here’s to being in a different place a year from now. I set 35 resolutions the other day, and it is my hope that these resolutions will help me to be the person I thought I was. I hope to be here in a year saying that I met each and every one of those resolutions (and more), but more than that, I hope to say in a year that I’m a better:
· Husband
· Employee
· Writer
· Christian
· Lover of life
· Gamer
