NFL: Week 1 Picks

This year, I'll be attempting to make picks for every game. I've picked the playoffs well every year (mostly), so here's my first shot at regular season. At the end of the column, you'll find a Mortal Lock pick - you can bet on that matchup. Also, the X-Factor or Upset of the Week that may throw a spanner in the works

Also, I have no memory. I don't remember what I wrote two weeks ago about the NFL; just that I thought Cleveland would surprise. If I contradict myself, that means I was right at least once, so there.

Vikings at Saints: Defending Champions, at home. This will be a monster game, and Drew Brees has supplanted Manning / Brady and Former Favre as the QB to never bet against. Down by 20 in the fourth quarter and I'd still take Brees. So for this game, Brees wins in a thriller, 35-30. X-Factor: When will the Madden curse hit?

Dolphins at Bills: Dolphins. Seeing as neither of these teams interest me, I have nothing further to say.

Lions at Bears: In the battle for first most irrelevant in the NFC North... I'll take the Lions in a surprise victory. And Cutler throws up a foul-mouthed immature media storm when he gets sacked by Suh four or five times.

Raiders at Titans: Both these teams should improve upon their last year. Hard to pick in the first week - but I'll take the Titans because of homefield advantage.

Bengals at Patriots: Both teams have glaring weaknesses. Patriots have duct tape for a defense, and the Bengals have more reality TV shows than my wife has shoes. Safe prediction: Tom Brady. Oh, and that homefield advantage again.

Panthers at Giants: Giants are under the radar again - like the year they won the Super Bowl. Panthers are perhaps slightly overrated - losing Jake Delhomme helps them, but losing Julius Peppers does not. Go with the Giants.

Falcons at Steelers: There's some hype about Matt Ryan, but not as much as other young quarterbacks. I think Dennis Dixon struggles in week 1, and Atlanta takes them to task for it.

Browns at Buccaneers: Easy lay up to start looking like Nostradamus. Browns have more talent than the Bucs, plain and simple. If Jake really does rebound like I expect, this could be a shellacking.

Broncos at Jaguars: Will anyone in Jacksonville care if the Jags lose but Tim Tebow scores a random touchdown? I think this is basically a home game if for Denver if Tebow goes out on the field once. So then I'll take Denver.

Colts at Texans: Can you bet against Manning in the regular season? I can't until the fourteenth week. I'll take Manning.

Cardinals at Rams: Bradford should have a decent game, but Cardinals will still win. You can't overcome a talent deficit with one QB (See: 2009 Detroit Lions).

Packers at Eagles: Rough game for Kevin Kolb to start. I'm rooting against Aaron Rodgers now, because I traded him, and don't want to look like an idiot, but I think the Pack will not struggle too much here.

49ers at Seahawks: San Francisco by a mile. Seahawks don't have a coach; they have Pete Carroll.

Cowboys at Redskins: It amuses me to no end when Dallas falters. So in my Upset of the Week, I'll take the Redskins.

Ravens at Jets: Joe Flacco just got Housmanzhasd (or however you spell it) to go with Boldin. Which is good, because the Jets just got Revis back. Still, I think Mark Sanchez is vastly overrated and will see some definite sophomore blues. Ravens in a close game.

Chargers at Chiefs: Mortal Lock of the Week: Chargers. You know why? Because Philip Rivers has the drive to win. When has Matt Cassel ever shown drive? And no, picking up Leinart or Brady's dry cleaning doesn't count.